Kiss closing for me, I think I always wait for the right moment, like I somehow think I'm in a movie and the music should come on and I should be like "oh shit this is the moment." I can do everything else, build comfort, attraction, kino escalation to the point where it's hands on her waist, lower back, on her thigh. Just going for a decent kiss close is my sticking point, I guess it's fear of rejection..

Thanks Slywalker for starting this thread. I'd like to have some help with my sticking point: taking girls home directly from bars/clubs.

I'm doing ok with the usual number-close, day-2/day-3, followed by full close, when I play my cards right. I always journal, so when I screw up, I can analyze what I could have done differently and take steps to improve.

But when it comes to taking girls home directly from bars/clubs the same day I met her, I find that even when I have solid IOIs, I find it hard to go for a full close the same night. I think part of it is just panic, that she might have some STDs or something. Part of this is just plain inexperience. Part of this is just not being comfortable enough to do this, after having known her for such a short while.

So, what would be a good strategy, to move steadily through this sticking point? What is the type of mindset you have during such SNLs?

For example: Just a month back, I was trying to get past this sticking point with a girl I had just met, an HB9. I managed to bounce her, but then did not make more effort...and let her go with n-close. When I talked to her a few days later, I found out she's separated from her husband and has a kid. And that she really wants to see me again.

Now, although at the moment I had felt she's a really nice girl, after having heard she has a kid, I am unsure about whether I want to get involved with her any further. And experiences such as this probably works to reinforce my conditioning against SNLs, which is a sticking point I am trying to get past.

Thanks for helping out.

Showing interest and asking her out on a date. I have no problem building attraction and comfort, but I don't know how to make it clear that I am interested in her and ask her out. I end up waiting too long and her attraction eventually dies.

My most recent example of this is a coworker I really like right now...she gives me IOIs and I flirt with her, but I can't pull the trigger for some reason. She is showing less interest everyday...probably because she thinks I'm not interested in her.

What I noticed when I first learned about these situations is that it is all about making yourself available.
I am sure you have heard of the benefits of always carrying a condom, you are basically always ready for sex, and this gives you sort of a sense of security. When it comes to same night lays it is the same things. Most guys fail because of inhibitions such as STDs, location, consequences, their performance with a stranger etc.
The main step to become successful and have a lot of one night stands is to train yourself to remove all these inhibitions. This is why people have an easier time to bring a girl home when they are drunk and or on vacation, because they have less inhibitions in these situations.
Sit down one day and identify your inhibitions, think about what it would take for you to have no issues with bringing a girl home or following her somewhere. Now try to bring that feeling of confidence with you to the club/bar/party. The actual act of picking her up is the same as day game, just see it as an instant date. Basically, approach, build attraction, maybe make out for a bit, suggest an after party or some bullshit.
If you have no fear about taking girls home on the first night you will notice that it starts happening a lot more! But be aware, she may have the same fears that you once had, so you have to be ready to "help" her with them as well.

Hope this helps.

Posted this one over here.

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Would appreciate any insights.

I feel like being bold will get me results also and I will get myself to do it more often, but in my particular case with the coworker, If I directly ask her out and she says no, it would create a very awkward situation and I wouldn't be able to save face. I can deal with rejection from random people at bars, but if my coworker rejected me, that would be embarrassing and awkward. Also, there are few customers I flirt with, but these girls all know my coworkers one way or another, so again being bold might backfire since word would most definitely spread...any thoughts on this matter?

PS - on a separate, but related topic...can you talk a little about timing? I feel like ALL girls' attraction dies out drastically after the initial "window of opportunity." Why is this? Is it because they think you aren't interested or they get bored that easily? I think I get attraction and think to myself I don't have enough comfort to ask her out yet...let's not rush this and blow it...let her feel more comfortable around me so there is no doubt when I pull the trigger. But it gets tricky because girls will be all flirty with me and literally a day after they will be cold and uninterested...are girls really that fickle or are they gaming you?

Sorry I'm rambling...The most frustrating part for me is finding a balance. When I show interest, they back off and become cold and distant. Then when I back off, they fight for my attention...I don't get it!

Hello, so this is my sticking point, with new girls I'm just BAM and I am in, getting physical, don't care, gold comes out of my mouth, my frame is strong, flirts .... but with girls that i know, I'm confident but fear to touch or get physical; e.g. girls in school, i care too much, i don't know how to care less. Also i like a girl and i fear she will not like me, i act so needy, i need some help.