PUA Forum :: She thinks i'm TOO alpha

My response,

"If I was a player, would I still be calling you, and wanting to spend time with you?"

I would actually go in with a different approach. I would bring it up, and tell her if she believed the shit her friends were spewing then she can continue to shy away from me. Tell her you thought she could see the real you, but apparently her friends have too much of an influence on her. Then stop talking to her.

This, of course, is very risky. I would use only if you don't care if you lose her, because you could either come out way on top or indeed lose her.

wow thanks for all the responses guys, they all make a lot of sence and I will definitely take all of them into account...and alexxx, I really like the post about the different types of alpha male thanks a lot

update:
over the past week or two I have been taking the confident persistant approach calling her, texting, e-mailing so she would know that I am really interested but she didn't respond to me so I said "oh well" and maybe it's time to NEXT, but when I woke up this morning after not communicating with her all weekend I got a text from her saying "just wanted to say hi"

...i'm thinking that I should play this by making it seem like she lost a point in my book for not returning any of my calls, but that might me WAY off, im not sure....how should I play this guys???

Author:	rocket farm [ Mon Oct 22, 2007 3:50 pm ]
Post subject:	She thinks i'm TOO alpha
I am really into this one girl who I know likes me because we hooked up and we were laying in bed and she told me how much she liked me and the entire day the next day she kept saying how much she liked me....the problem is that her friends keep telling her that i'm a player who always who always says nice things to girls just to get some from girls, SO NOW SHE BACKED OFF...I want to show her that i'm not a player and genuinely interested in her but I don't want to look too interested in her by looking needy.......help me out guys thanks

Author:	atilla_the_hun [ Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:07 pm ]
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stop caring about that shit and just be alpha around her - but show some interest in her. Showing interest doesn't mean you're needy. Remember to use the word WANT instead of NEED, have a winner attitude even when loosing at something, always turn around things and put them in a very positive light (that will always attract some appreciation). Go for it man!

Author:	rocket farm [ Mon Oct 22, 2007 4:22 pm ]
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I appreciate the response...i'll deffinitely keep that in mind

Author:	horseradish [ Tue Oct 23, 2007 2:08 am ]
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won over her friends with your charms.

Author:	Aifia [ Tue Oct 23, 2007 4:59 am ]
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keep acting alpha, but make her feel like she's special to you and different from all the other girls youd flirt with

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Author:	Muse [ Sat Oct 27, 2007 6:40 pm ]
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Now this post was just a bit vague concerning her friends, but my guess is you either haven't had a chance, or just haven't won them over...yet. This actually happened to my buddy, Class. It put him in a shitty place when this chick's friends talked her into never seeing him again. You HAVE to win over her friends, in other words: disarm the obstacles. My advice is to ask her to do something as a group with her friends, possibly a couple of your own as well. Your buddies should keep them distracted, and it will give you a chance to show her friends you're not what they think. Everyone else is right too, do not stop being alpha. Lead the group and you'll have her for sure. If you win over a woman's friends, they will be your best asset... if you have them against you, they will be your worst enemy. It's social proof at it's best. If you aren't able to get the chance, ride this out while you can to see where it goes, but be ready to Next her.

Author:	ForgiveMyGame [ Sat Oct 27, 2007 11:08 pm ]
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I reckon you should continue to act as you would around her, any change in personality would come across awkward. You can never be too alpha, and one of the things and alpha embodies is an attitude where you don't really care of others opinions. Display that to her, if she brings it up make it clear you wont apologize for her friends opinions of you and make her feel silly for even taking it on board. Kinda make her feel like shes lost points for even listening to them (do this with care), she should be lucky to have your attention! That my two cents, Gud luck!

Author:	Rye Lee [ Sat Oct 27, 2007 11:19 pm ]
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Make it clear that you are not a player, you don't seduce women just to have sex with them and drop them. You are a nice person and that's why people say you act nice to other girls. You can't help it that they find you attractive and you enjoyed their company as well, so you had a relationship, and unfortunately it didn't go anywhere. When a relationship ends, the healthy thing to do, is to move on and when you find someone else who's company you enjoy... look her in the eyes and run your hand down her upper arm ...there's no reason why you wouldn't become close as well. Simple. Don't let her stop you while you're doing this, it is something that you say honestly and without joking around or any big smiles, small ones are fine at certain points.

Author:	crash1 [ Sun Oct 28, 2007 10:40 pm ]
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My response, "If I was a player, would I still be calling you, and wanting to spend time with you?" Also, the advice on winning the friends over is GREAT. You HAVE to win the friends to get the girl...or at least to keep her. Be strong, and don't put up with BS, but also be kind.

Author:	96Firebird [ Sun Oct 28, 2007 11:31 pm ]
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I would actually go in with a different approach. I would bring it up, and tell her if she believed the shit her friends were spewing then she can continue to shy away from me. Tell her you thought she could see the real you, but apparently her friends have too much of an influence on her. Then stop talking to her. This, of course, is very risky. I would use only if you don't care if you lose her, because you could either come out way on top or indeed lose her.

Author:	Rye Lee [ Sun Oct 28, 2007 11:44 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: My response, "If I was a player, would I still be calling you, and wanting to spend time with you?" This leaves too much chance that there will be doubt in her mind about you, because if you haven't slept with her, then yes, you would still be calling her and spending time with her. Quote: I would actually go in with a different approach. I would bring it up, and tell her if she believed the shit her friends were spewing then she can continue to shy away from me. Tell her you thought she could see the real you, but apparently her friends have too much of an influence on her. Then stop talking to her. This, of course, is very risky. I would use only if you don't care if you lose her, because you could either come out way on top or indeed lose her. This is good, but read the fine print.

Author:	96Firebird [ Mon Oct 29, 2007 2:03 am ]
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Ah, I see he is very interested in her. You can still try it, but like I said, its risky.

Author:	alexxx [ Mon Oct 29, 2007 5:49 am ]
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My friends and I have discussed at length our belief that there are two distinct classes of alpha males. Alpha status can be achieved through bullying, insults, slights and sheer physical dominance, or it can be achieved by being the 'generally nice guy who doesn't get pushed around.' I believe that the large majority of girls will prefer the latter. You can be funny, outgoing, social and friendly, still assert dominance, and do it all without stepping on anyone's toes or AMOGing anyone. Be a true alpha male, not a player, and her friends should come around.

Author:	rocket farm [ Mon Oct 29, 2007 12:58 pm ]
Post subject:
wow thanks for all the responses guys, they all make a lot of sence and I will definitely take all of them into account...and alexxx, I really like the post about the different types of alpha male thanks a lot update: over the past week or two I have been taking the confident persistant approach calling her, texting, e-mailing so she would know that I am really interested but she didn't respond to me so I said "oh well" and maybe it's time to NEXT, but when I woke up this morning after not communicating with her all weekend I got a text from her saying "just wanted to say hi" ...i'm thinking that I should play this by making it seem like she lost a point in my book for not returning any of my calls, but that might me WAY off, im not sure....how should I play this guys???

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Author:	Rye Lee [ Mon Oct 29, 2007 1:44 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: wow thanks for all the responses guys, they all make a lot of sence and I will definitely take all of them into account...and alexxx, I really like the post about the different types of alpha male thanks a lot update: over the past week or two I have been taking the confident persistant approach calling her, texting, e-mailing so she would know that I am really interested but she didn't respond to me so I said "oh well" and maybe it's time to NEXT, but when I woke up this morning after not communicating with her all weekend I got a text from her saying "just wanted to say hi" ...i'm thinking that I should play this by making it seem like she lost a point in my book for not returning any of my calls, but that might me WAY off, im not sure....how should I play this guys??? Stop calling her constantly, its AFC. Why do you want her to think that you're really interested? What book told you that that would work? Go back to the basics man, this is all solved with basics.