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| Help me with my DHV story https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=55&t=59149 |
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| Author: | SummerNight [ Sat Jan 02, 2010 3:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Help me with my DHV story |
My native language is not english so I’m gonna try to translate this DHV story as precise as I can but..there’s always something that gets lost in translation. Anyways, I want you to help me with this story and tell me what I should improve and what points are good. Thank you! Singing DHV story Intro: You know, I just came from Mc Donalds and saw the XXX from the Estonian Idol (our version of American Idol). I was like WOW, this dude is fcking TALL [smile]. Do you like the show Estonian Idol? (her answer doesn’t matter) Ok, but..can you sing? (her answer still doesn’t matter, it’s MY frame also, the question is a little qualification also. Anyways, if she says she can sing, then I reward her with: cool, I like chicks who can sing). Story: When I think about singing, I always remember my Christmast party at school a few years ago. Every class had to peform something on stage. Everybody had a thing to do but our class was not very active and we had NOTHING to go up with. The I said to myself: fck this, I can do it, I’m gonna go up there and sing something [smile]. I don’t even remember the song anymore..it was something like..“Suudlus läbi jäätunud klaasi“ or smthing (a very romantic Christmas song in our country). So I went up to the stage and was like..wow..like..the WHOLE school is here [smile]. I started singing and it was AWSOME. The whole nervous thing..flew out of the window. The audience started to clap along and I was feeling like a fcking rock star [smile]. It was like THE MOST amazing feeling ever. I felt like..this is SOO right, I was born for staff like this [smile]. And the aplause was heartbrakeing, it was soo WARM.. You know the feeling when you feel that you are getting an ultimate credit for something that you LOVE doing.. It was like..you have seen the move „Fun with Dick and Jane“? Anyways, there’s this sceene where Jim Carry is being promoted at work and his moving up in elevator and then he just starts singing I believe I can fly and eventually doing all theese crazy movements [smile]. I felt the SAME fcking way, without the wierd movements ofc [smile]. The reality was that I was not a very popular guy in school and even the guys who used to make fun of me were saying: dude, you really can sing awsome and the girls were also all looking at me. I don’t know how can I put theese two things in the story without seeming DLV and try hard? |
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| Author: | Unknown001 [ Mon Jan 04, 2010 3:06 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I dig it! I think the story is full with heartful emotion. I stopped packing my stories with DHV spikes like Mystery. Im not trying to criticize Mystery but for me, packing stories with too many DHV spikes comes of as to try hard (like I said, thats my opinion. Mystery has some crazy DHV stories that amazes me as to how he picks up women with his stories and also dressing the the way he does). Seeing as this story is a little lengthy i suggest you use it say when your in A2 to C1. Like i said before i think this story is tight. Just practice delivery. Kudos! |
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