A lot of guys use texting as a way of building attraction (thru teasing, etc.). My approach is different. Though I text a lot, I rarely try to ‘achieve’ anything thru it. I focus instead on:
1) being brief & matter-of-fact.
2) asking fairly basic questions & giving honest, direct answers.
3) not trying to get anything from her.
I’ve found that this approach to work quite well for me; in most cases, women end up taking the initiative.
I’ve included an example to illustrate.
NOTE: The following story happened several years ago. I ended up saving the exchange for posterity. There are some things I’d do differently now.
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It started one morning when I woke up and had this text message on my phone:
Her: R u awake? This is Sarah.
At the time, I had a number of “Sarah’s” on my phone, but not this one.
Trying to jog my memory, I text back:
Me: Hey, just got ur text. What’s up?
Her: Time to go running. What does your schedule look like hottie?
Me: Not sure, lots of options. What were you thinking?
Her: When can u hit the pavement?
Me: Are you asking me out?
Her: To run, u said u could when I met u. Do u remember me?
At this point, I run a quick search on my email inbox, using her phone number.
It turns out I contacted her on a dating site, but that was somet time ago.
Me: Um I think you might have the wrong guy.
Her: Nope. We talked at Club x, a while ago. I had the twin.
Haven’t been to Club x in ages.
I’m tempted at this point to tease and respond with something like “I remember the twin, she was hot, but I don’t remember you.” But here, again, is where my lazier approach is different…
Me: How long ago was that?
Her: 2 or 3 months. U would remember if u saw a pic.
Me: I’m sorry, I get a lot of women texting me, but I’m usually better with faces.
Her: I know what u mean, I get a lot of women texting me as well.
I figure she’s just being facetious (little did I know she was actually being serious; see below).
Me: LOL I’m sure ur cool, if I gave u my #. Thing is, I’m seeing a few women casually and only capable of a purely physical relationship at the moment. Still interested?
Her: To be honest, I’m really only into women but tolerate men bc my girlfriend likes them. Maybe if u can us a pic I can run it past her and we can plan something. Still interested?
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-Dan
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