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Should I interrupt her while speaking?
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Author:  Dr^ZigMan [ Sun Mar 23, 2008 5:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Should I interrupt her while speaking?
I've noticed a lot that once I get past the opening and I start eliciting the target's stories they tend to talk and talk and talk and talk ... and talk about themselves. I don't mind, I love to hear people's stories. However, I want to identify with their story, to show our commonalties and build more attraction but I'm unsure as to exactly how to do it.

Should I interrupt them and identify with the story then ask them to continue?

Is it better to interrupt, then tell my story that identifies with them then tell them to continue?

Should I wait for them to finish the story (basically just listen) then chime in? I'm worries about that as by the end of the story we're usually talking about something else.

I want to make sure that I continue to build attraction and not just be another "listener." I remember from AFC days that listening was something I was great at but it never got me past the LJBF zone, just wondering how a PUA handles this.
Author:  Rapture7 [ Mon Mar 24, 2008 6:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
Interupt and add in your opinions and personal experiences. This shows your listening and your interested in what she is saying. She'll enjoy it more because she is getting feedback.

Don't worry she will remember where you interupted and continue from there once your done.
Author:  yokezg63 [ Mon Mar 24, 2008 7:10 pm ]
Post subject: 
Anytime two people are talking, one person controls the conversation while the other offers opinions. Being a good listener is a great quality that not many people possess; however, when you're trying to game a girl you need to be the one dominating.

This is crucial, because the one who controls the conversation is always the person of higher status. Your boss talks while all of his employees listen, right? Nobody tries to tell the boss what's up, because everyone know their place in relation to the boss. It's the same way with people. When women dominate the first conversation they have with a guy, the man runs risk of falling into Friend Zone. He's not a leader, he's a lower status male to bond with.

For some reason, you're doing something to give the girl the reins while you two are talking. It's natural to ask a girl how she feels about certain topics; there's nothing wrong with that. However, she's going to often look for you to respond with some confirmation of her beliefs or a different opinion. When she gives you this opening, you have to take control by speaking with authority. Don't ask for validation or opinions on what you're saying. Just say what you think, and end it there. This prompts her to either agree with you or disagree - she becomes the opinion giver. By doing this, you've taken control.

If she disagrees with you, then discuss things out with her reasonably - don't get defensive. An alpha male never feels like he has to validate his beliefs. And if you guys disagree on a LOT of things, then it's probably time to move on. You guys wouldn't work out, anyways.

Once you guys get to know each other, then it's OK to become the listener. Personally, I'd wait until you guys have established romantic and physical attraction. Don't be the sympathizer or nurturer until you've fully placed yourself out of the Friend Zone.
Author:  brookes12 [ Tue Mar 25, 2008 11:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
there right, interupt, but id say make sure you let them say the bulk of it then you can comment on what they have to say, it shows your listerning. But remember that you should be talking the most as you should be managing/organising the convo

you can also add a dhv story off it. eg.

hb: blah blah our best nyt out was in london when... (interupt)
you: omg, my best nyts out are in london becuse ...blank (Add dhvs)

This shows more attraction as it looks like you have more in common
Author:  HBhitman [ Thu Mar 27, 2008 4:58 am ]
Post subject: 
My favorite line to use in this situation is:

"Excuse me. Why are we talking about you when I'm obviously more important." (with a smile)

Now this isn't the exact line I use everytime, but if you're letting her ramble SHE holds the attention. That's not me. I better have the attention or I'm moving on to someone else.

I very often roll off a HB and on to a random person. The thought here is "I don't care if you're hot. You're not interesting. I'd rather talk to the fat bouncer than your boring ass."

Chicks hate it and WILL get the drift.
Author:  Zuek [ Fri Mar 28, 2008 2:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Should I interrupt her while speaking?
Quote:
I've noticed a lot that once I get past the opening and I start eliciting the target's stories they tend to talk and talk and talk and talk ... and talk about themselves. I don't mind, I love to hear people's stories. However, I want to identify with their story, to show our commonalties and build more attraction but I'm unsure as to exactly how to do it.

Should I interrupt them and identify with the story then ask them to continue?

Is it better to interrupt, then tell my story that identifies with them then tell them to continue?

Should I wait for them to finish the story (basically just listen) then chime in? I'm worries about that as by the end of the story we're usually talking about something else.

I want to make sure that I continue to build attraction and not just be another "listener." I remember from AFC days that listening was something I was great at but it never got me past the LJBF zone, just wondering how a PUA handles this.
Aaaaaand back to me.
Author:  parkour [ Sat Mar 29, 2008 5:23 am ]
Post subject: 
Sometimes getting bored/disinterested works just as well.
Author:  Diaz [ Sat Mar 29, 2008 2:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
I love to interrupt a hb when she is talking, as they are so used to guys just listening to all their stories..

Here is one I really like:

Me: hey, so how was your day?
HB: Oh, blah blah blah.. and then I blah blah blah..
(after a minute or so she usually starts to get into details)
Me: ok, ok.. hold it.. I don't need to know your every single movement.. like... [start repeating things she said really over acting it in a funny way and adding EXACT times to things]

For example, if she told you that she first after work went to see a friend and then to a coffee shop, say "Oh, and then at 4:06 PM I got from work and then at 4:12 I saw my friend Lizzie and then at 5:27 I went to that coffee shop"

Tell me what you think :)
Have used this on the field very often, nice way to bust her.
Author:  imnotghetto [ Wed Apr 02, 2008 12:26 am ]
Post subject: 
"He's such a good listener" That leads to just friends zone. You're letting her do all the talking when you ought to be controlling the convo. Yes, it's okay to interrupt. Just don't go out and tell her to shut up or anything lol.

I always remember that funny/saracasm is the easy way.
Author:  Mr. Amador [ Wed Apr 02, 2008 1:07 am ]
Post subject: 
Ok....firstable you seem to be talking about a conversation after opening, a couple minutes in the set.

So if she talks too much you have the best chance to neg:

RedMole: "jesus, you talk way too much (to the others) is she always like that?"

Dont lisent to a girl during attraction phase, why would you care about her, if you have just met her?. AFCs pay attention to every word ever spoken by a girl, it conveys too much interest and the girl finds that boring: you get blown out. A PUA? doesnt.

When a girl is talking too much I just...yawn. Even if the conversation is going great...even if she is the most interesting person in the world...I yawn.
Author:  Mr. Amador [ Wed Apr 02, 2008 1:18 am ]
Post subject: 
and if you are past attraction, and doing EV...just tease her to break tension. Remember you arent her therapist, its a two way thing!!.

This one is my favorite ones is:

Red: "Hey, do you have a pen? let m show you something, this is really live-changing stuff!!!, there was a race, of three mice, a blind one, a dumb one and a deft one. (grab her hand) here the blind one starts, tell me when do you think he would stop

(start making a line on her wrist, go up her arm and stop when she says so)

Red: "Now thw dumb one"

(Repeat as above)

Red: "Now...the deft one"

Start drawing the line and when she says stop; just keep going, remember....is a deft mouse.

Its a funny, teasing thing to do. and if you just performed the cube or something, it breaks tension and puts conversation back in normal topics.
Author:  AlphaX [ Fri Apr 04, 2008 12:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
I agree with the basic idea up there: Just take control of the conversation, interrupt her. Just start off with: Hey, I gotta show you this one thing.
Gor for that in the middle of her conversation. It negs her, is a IOD and gives you a DHV. It really doesnt matter what it is. Act like it just came on your mind, but have that one canned. if you hesitate for one second it wont work and she'll feel offended because you interrupted her intentionally, thinking about it beforehand. also dont wait for the right moment, just do it anytime. well , not really anytime, but you'll know when, just use your intuition. So make sure the routine you're using to interrupt her is in the can for good and it should probably involve some kino, a test of some sort.
Author:  rockin_out [ Sat Apr 05, 2008 7:05 pm ]
Post subject: 
When they interrupt, let them speak for a minute, then with a waving motion, as if you're pointing the attention back to yourself, say "aaaaaaaaand back to me. so anyway blah blah blah" You can see Mystery do it in that 2 minute video on youtube with the hidden cameras in the club where he starts off by saying "this is called opening a set" and then winks. it's towards the end of the video that he does the "back to me" thing
Author:  Ka [ Sat Apr 05, 2008 7:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Id mix it up, one time cut her off, identify then let her continue (dont ask her to)...next time cut her off and tell your own story, see if she keeps going and if not be ready to continue yourself.

If she tries to cut you off neg her. The only point at which you wana let people talk and possibly finish if they arent to long winded is in comfort building.
Author:  Rye Lee [ Wed Apr 09, 2008 4:54 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Id mix it up, one time cut her off, identify then let her continue (dont ask her to)...next time cut her off and tell your own story, see if she keeps going and if not be ready to continue yourself.

If she tries to cut you off neg her. The only point at which you wana let people talk and possibly finish if they arent to long winded is in comfort building.
This is what I would go with.

I interrupt people all the time, because they're gonna end up trying to interrupt you too. You let them talk and they'll just keep going and it will get boring for you and them, plus you won't escalate things at all.
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