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| Talking about your Job!!! https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=55&t=15596 |
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| Author: | mike1234 [ Sat Jan 26, 2008 8:34 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Talking about your Job!!! |
I wanted to post my thoughts about talking about your job to a woman in the first night you met her. I rarely even talk about my job. And I'm a Film/Music Video/Commercial Director so I could go on and on about all of the famous people I've met, ect ect. Instead, I maybe casually mention it, and then move onto another topic. This creates a curiousity of my interesting job, but for the most part I really don't care about bragging about it. I'd much rather talk to a woman about how I don't think jobs are that important, but instead I think happiness is about developing relationships in your life (both romantic and non-romantic). I really believe this, and women love talking about this kind of stuff. Talking about relationships gets them thinking about being intimate with you. Talking about jobs will bore them. Sure its good to share a little so that they know you aren't a bum, but I wouldn't say more than a few sentences about your job, UNLESS you see her perk up and become really interested. And even THEN, you can still wait so that she is curious. You leave her wanting more. That's what we call creating intrigue. Intrigue is absolutely crucial in convincing a woman to talk to you longer, go on a date, ect ect. Of course eventually you'll tell her more about your job, but I would wait til you go on a first date. And even then, just be careful about babbling about your job for too long. I even say right out to some women "I'm a film director, but I know you don't give a shit about what I do, besides wanting to know I'm not a bum. What you really care about is connecting with me as a person." And then I steer the convo into talking about relationships, values, ect ect. Try this out, you will get a good reaction! |
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| Author: | feneix2012 [ Sun Jan 27, 2008 1:59 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
i generally do not talk about my job but then again my job sucks because im in college and work retail. many girls around here are so obsessed with their own careers that if you can be charming and funny then they could care less what you do. of course the girls i tend to be attracted to are in their mid 20s and divorced from their high school boyfriends that they married the summer after graduation. and then also if you are sarging a couger then the job thing tends to be irrevelent. feneix2012 |
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| Author: | Frozec [ Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:15 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Mike, I see what your getting at about your job.......I myself work at a Radio Staton as a producer and DJ at night clubs....I personaly don't brag about my career.....if a girl ask about what I do I just tell them I'm a producer/dj (I don't mention what station or clubs) and switch the convo to another topic...if they start asking you questions about it just answer them(make it short and to the point) and switch topic back to her....it will give you DHV (cause of ur job) and show her that your not into yourself and ur there to get to know her......hope that helped u |
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| Author: | Chino Kapone [ Wed Jan 30, 2008 5:16 pm ] |
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I run a modern furniture store. If im talking with a girl i meet for the first time i just say im a Professional Hop Scotch player. I don't remeber where i got that from, one of Deangelo's interviews i think. But it works great every time. I just never give a straight answer on what i do. |
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| Author: | frankj [ Fri Aug 01, 2008 4:39 pm ] |
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Was watching My Name is Earl and got this idea from there... I'm a newbie (hece my trawling through old posts) and have only done one approach (broke it off coz she didn't look quite so good up close!) so havn't used it yet... I'm circus freak, I'm the world's tallest midget. Can't wait to try it out |
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| Author: | Hyaline [ Mon Aug 04, 2008 7:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Great points mike..but I have a question. How do you go about this when the woman is older than you. I recently met a 26 year old at a club and n-closed. I didn't lie to her about my age, she knows I'm 21. On day 2 do I bring it up or will it show lower value for me since I just graduated and don't really have my dream job yet. On the other hand I'm going to be starting on my masters soon so that might show her that I'm not a bum and I'm pretty mature for my age. What do you think? |
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| Author: | cunning linguist [ Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Interesting. I #closed an HB9 on the bus months ago. She asked me what I did, told her I’m a gardener and she played along, asking me where I worked. PUA: around the city. its lots of work. Here, feel my palms… I offered both palms upwards, she places hers on them and I grab her hands HB9: but they’re soft! Number closed, she came over to my place a week later where I did more kino and fucked the brains out of her. So, maybe its okay to use your “work” to get laid. |
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| Author: | Bonita [ Thu Aug 28, 2008 2:07 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I went out with a lawyer tonight and he talked about his job for a bit and it was really boring (no offense to any lawyers here). But there was no way to build attraction when he was talking about his job. So like you said, it is okay to mention it casually so she gets a sense of who you are, but especially in my case, I didn't fall head-over-heels by him talking about his job. |
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| Author: | shaggy2299 [ Thu Aug 28, 2008 3:22 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I don't see anything wrong with talking about your job when it finally comes down to it, after the funny evasive stuff It should be ok as long as you use it as an oppotuinity to do dhv's paint a picture with words about how the job makes you feel etc. so which of these two would leave a better impression on a girl : I'm a gardener, it's hard work but pays well and I get to enjoy the fresh air, sucks when it rains, is good in summer though, I get to meet nice people and do some good gardens. OR I'm a gardener, I love the feeling of taking something barren and rough and creating a space where things flourish and people can take enjoyment, it's a bit like being an artist I guess so it's a really satisfying job and I enjoy every moment of it.. having said that if you can't think of anything positive about your job then skip it.. don't talk about it just because she expects you to, just say it's really boring, it isn't who you are but what you do for work at the moment. |
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| Author: | Chino Kapone [ Thu Aug 28, 2008 3:37 pm ] |
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Bonita, My guess is that he was trying to use his job to DHV. Most guys along those lines expect a woman to naturally be attracted to them because they have a good job drive a nice car or blah blah blah.... My opinion is that guys should know that once they are out with a woman they do not have to DHV as much anymore. The woman is already out with the guy. So she was already impressed by something. |
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| Author: | Benign [ Thu Aug 28, 2008 8:19 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Talking about your Job!!! |
mike1234 hit many good points. It's important to take into account the very first sentence when reading the rest of the post. The bulk of mike1234's (solid) advice is specifically tailored for the first night you meet her. Key point here is to quickly steer away from the job conversation if it should arise (let her save that for her parents and AFCS) and instead use your limited/precious time to bond with her on subjects proven to build attraction and invoke thoughts of intimacy, like the subject of relationships. (READ THIS PARAGRAPH 1 MORE TIME!) This can effectively change a common conversation into the perfect grounds to mirror and relay her thoughts back to her (which you should be doing at somepoint anyhow). Remember, words at this point in your interaction, should have no other purpose than to seduce. I love the idea of just saying it outright. I feel doing it just as suggested delivers several messages about you boldy, quickly and very efficiently. I'm going to do this everytime from now on (thanks mike1234). (Outside of the 'first conversation' context, your job can successfully be used as content for DHV/whatever ) Benign |
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| Author: | Benign [ Thu Aug 28, 2008 9:52 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Talking about your Job!!! |
Also, if you're able to successfully switch gears and you receive positive reactions as a result of mirroring her thoughts/ideas. You can follow up with this (as it very briefly, references work): "You know whats interesting is while I was taking lunch the other day (1), I read an article (2) on the whole 'Opposites Attract' idea. At the end the article it suggested that while it IS sometimes true, commonality with another (3) tends to make you regard that person as more trustworthy(4), because you see that part of yourself, in them. What do you think?" I'm sure the key strengths and purpose of the above are obvious. It is open ended, keeps the convo on the right track and puts the ball in her court. ------------------------------------------------------------ (1) Reinforces the fact you have a job (2) You read on your lunch break, indicates intelligence (3) Make sure you use the worth "another" and not "someone". I'm not exactly sure why, but overall it feels more genuine. (4) NLP: You can anchor here by subtlety placing your hand on your chest (optional) Benign |
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| Author: | Eyeline [ Fri Aug 29, 2008 8:58 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I agree and I think you're making good points. I'm a designer but sometimes I get sick of telling people what I do. A couple nights two girls asked me what I do. I told them I'm a stripper at a gaybar. They sort of started giggling about that. Then at one point one of them sort of got a bit pissed off and asked why I can't tell her what I really do. She didn't like to play along I guess keep on keepin on. |
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| Author: | jurupa [ Fri Aug 29, 2008 11:01 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I went out with a lawyer tonight and he talked about his job for a bit and it was really boring (no offense to any lawyers here). But there was no way to build attraction when he was talking about his job. In my experience with lawyers is pretty much stay away from them unless you need them or they are family. Quote: So like you said, it is okay to mention it casually so she gets a sense of who you are, but especially in my case, I didn't fall head-over-heels by him talking about his job. I found the way you describe your job is huge. If I told a girl I do security I basically lost all chances with the girl. But if I tell a girl that I deal with performers and make sure the patrons behave, it sounds a heck a lot better and the performer part is a huge DHV spike.Quote: Key point here is to quickly steer away from the job conversation if it should arise (let her save that for her parents and AFCS) and instead use your limited/precious time to bond with her on subjects proven to build attraction and invoke thoughts of intimacy, like the subject of relationships. (READ THIS PARAGRAPH 1 MORE TIME!) I highly disagree with this. There are jobs out there that can DHV. Plus what girl wants to go out with a guy that has no job? I am not saying to go in full detail of what your job is, but just give a brief overview of it and move on. When you meet the parent you then go in more detail about the job.
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| Author: | kasabi [ Sat Aug 30, 2008 7:59 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Different for everyone in different situations so I don't think there a right answer here. If the women you approach already tell you their legit professions and it's somewhat on par with what you do, there's nothing wrong telling them what you do just as a dull conversation piece. However, it's so gay to display your career as a value crutch when all you're trying to do is open up conversation and have a good time. Also, all women want to do is piece up the big pieces of the puzzle.(Mostly on a subconscious level) They don't want to know your schedule, industry, blah, blah. Women can spot good fabric right away. They can tell from a watch looks 20k or 20 dollars. They can tell how proficient you are through your mannerism and presence. If your working the set well, I think the only thing that "work talk" can do is . . . yeah, make everybody talk about "work". Who the hell wants to hear about work at a bar or night club unless it involves some taboo inter-office sex orgy? |
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