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Heavy Interest, Make Out Day 1... but Stays with BF on Day 2
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Author:  TheRedBaron [ Tue May 31, 2011 11:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Heavy Interest, Make Out Day 1... but Stays with BF on Day 2
THE STORY:

I've had terrible, terrible puppy love for this girl for almost a year. But she's been in a relationship since the fall, and I'm just now getting better at PU after being an AFC, so it never went anywhere. We hung out only 2 or 3 times since the Fall. And we dated for 2-3 weeks about 3 years ago. Whenever we bump into each other on campus, she gets noticeably excited, so I figured there was some kind of attraction there.

So last Thursday I bump into her at a club, and she's ecstatic to see me. She's kind of drunk, I'm not, so we hold hands and talk for a long time. Twice she rests her head against my chest.

We get dropped off at her dorm community and make out at her door.

Not wanting her to think I'm a sleaze (b/c I actually do care what this one girl thinks of me) I pull back and tell her I'm not sure about this, she's drunk and has a boyfriend... really regret it now, but whatever.

She replies she's not that drunk and believes in living in the moment. So, back to making out.

Pause.

FAST FACTS ABOUT THE BOYFRIEND:

-Dating for 9-10 months
-They only see each other about twice a week from "9pm to 9 am" (I figure it's long distance)
-She doesn't feel compelled to say "I love you" to him
-She's going to a camp over the summer, won't see him at all
-She's moving to LA in Fall, making commute even longer

Alright.

So the next day, she ignores both my calls. It really, really bugs me because I really, really like this girl, and this feeling never EVER happens to me with a girl. I finally text her laying everything out.

I said I didn't know where her head was at after last night, if it was in a good place I'd like to take her out, if not then I just want to know for peace of mind. She responds she absolutely did not regret last night and believes in living in the moment, but she does have a boyfriend and isn't emotionally ready or willing to leave him or cheat on him, and that her life is crazy right now (with graduation, I assume).

I told her I respect that, and that I'm still down to hang as friends. She agrees, but says she thinks we should wait a little before we do, "to let things settle."

EPILOGUE:

And that's the last I heard from her. I've completely frozen her out since Saturday, but I'm not really sure what my plan should be from here on out.

Do I just ignore her until I hear from her?

Do I hang out with her and act as if she doesn't have a boyfriend?

My main fear is falling into LJBF land, which I think might happen if I hang out with her and don't handle it properly.

Help from the experts! Please!

-Baron
Author:  jfp [ Fri Jun 03, 2011 6:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
You might've intentionally friendzoned yourself my man. That's a horrible place to be. The thing about it is that you have to make her want you more than you want her, or at least an equal amount. You gave her everything in this situation whilst getting nothing. She made a mistake, and that mistake is you. You've got to get her to want to make that mistake over and over again ;). If she's ignoring your calls you don't call again. One call is enough. If she ignores the first one she will ignore the second one and it's sever DLV to call again. If she /wasn't/ ignoring the first call then you'll here from her as soon as she gets done doing what she needs to do.
Also, for the future:
If a girl ignores one method of communication, don't try another. It makes you look "thirsty" and DLV's you substantially. Especially because whoever is with her will be like "who the hell is that?" or something along those lines, and she'll reply with something like: "this guy that just keeps calling me".
Author:  kinorc [ Fri Jun 03, 2011 6:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
Wow...you literally did everything wrong and I mean eerything.

First off, who gives a fuck if she has a bf?! You stopped making out n then cockblocked yourself lmao. After she gives u the live in the moment line you should have fucked her. Instead you cut it short and brought up her bf!! That is the biggest misplay possible. After that you called n layer all your cards on the table. That was a horrible misplay. You gave her the option to be your friend?! Why would you want to be in the friendzone. You do know girls don't fuck their friends right?? You got excited n thought "oo shucks I like her im just gonna level with her". That's the dumbest thing possible. The game never stops! There is no reason to tell her you like her or ask her if she regrets anything. Show her how you feel, and don't bring up regret or any negative emotion. This is by far one of the worst plays I have seen posted here. Step up your game, and play better!!
Author:  jfp [ Fri Jun 03, 2011 6:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Wow...you literally did everything wrong and I mean eerything.

First off, who gives a fuck if she has a bf?! You stopped making out n then cockblocked yourself lmao. After she gives u the live in the moment line you should have fucked her. Instead you cut it short and brought up her bf!! That is the biggest misplay possible. After that you called n layer all your cards on the table. That was a horrible misplay. You gave her the option to be your friend?! Why would you want to be in the friendzone. You do know girls don't fuck their friends right?? You got excited n thought "oo shucks I like her im just gonna level with her". That's the dumbest thing possible. The game never stops! There is no reason to tell her you like her or ask her if she regrets anything. Show her how you feel, and don't bring up regret or any negative emotion. This is by far one of the worst plays I have seen posted here. Step up your game, and play better!!
:shock:
Although true, I would've taken a nicer approach to saying it. Encourage, don't bust balls. Lol :shock:
Author:  kinorc [ Fri Jun 03, 2011 7:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
Lol...after reading it again I may sound a lil harsh....its all tough love tho buddy. I just want you to play better next time, n im sure you will. Remember, there are no mistakes, just lessons to learn. Gl.
Author:  TheRedBaron [ Fri Jun 03, 2011 8:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
Lol.... little harsh man but I appreciate what you're doing. I know I fucked up. Just wondering if the situation is in any way salvageable, because this is one girl I do care about.

Right now my plan is to just not contact her for a while until an undetermined point in the future; i.e. if she breaks up, contacts me, I'm in the area, etc.
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