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Day 2 With A Flake
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Author:  ilovenyc [ Tue Jan 25, 2011 6:14 am ]
Post subject:  Day 2 With A Flake

Hey All,

First time post but I've followed this forum for a few months now and posted on one or two others. Decided I like this one most and have an interesting scenario on my hands.

Skip this paragraph if you're not interested in background info but I'd like to get a full critique. I was leaving a bar to go to another one. Had my two friends waiting for me outside while I closed tab. While I'm waiting to close out see this solid 9 at the bar, no friends around her. Decide what the hell, nothing to lose, might as well go in for the approach. Open with a shot at the dark asking if she went to Wisconsin since there was a big party there for someone from Wisconsin that I was there for; figured 40% chance of a yes and immediate social proof. She said no, so transitioned into Style's Facebook stalker opener. I knew I only had 4-5 minutes max since we had people waiting for us at this other place so tried to stack and move quickly. Established some callback humor by telling her she was like the little sister I never wanted, then it just so happens that my friends and I had gone to a brunch so incredible that morning that we took pictures of some of the dishes. Remembering how much more into food women are then men I casually brought it up, then when she seemed interested actually showed her the pictures. I was now past my deadline so I closed by telling her to leave her number and if she played her cards right I'd take her there one day. She left it just as the bartender came to close my tab; I added two shots of Patron, headed out pleased with my five minute drill.

Long story short, she flaked on me three times after this for varying reasons, most of which were probably BS. The issue in my opinion was that I only had 5 minutes so not nearly enough time to establish comfort plus the fact that I basically number closed and left a minute later. After three flakes taking her out tomorrow. Curious on thoughts on the following topics:

- Frame: obviously don't want to make it seem like her flaking affected me; at same time, don't want to seem like a pushover.
- Length of time: usually try to go 2-3 hours and bounce around for time distortion; however might make it shorter and breezier due to history.
- Activity: was going to go with dinner and ice skating (I'm a hockey player so it's good to give lessons). However, once again don't want to send too strong of message considering flaking.
- Kino: usually go for it somewhat early; once again, however, feel that playing this one a bit more "hard to get" might be best.

This plus any general thoughts you guys may have on the situation would be greatly appreciated. Looking forward to hearing what you think!

Author:  furiousracer313 [ Tue Jan 25, 2011 3:08 pm ]
Post subject: 

Your doing good. Yeah she flaked you 3 times, but atleast now you got a date. So dont act bothered by the flakes. I think you'll be fine if the date goes well. And yes kino, just dont go over the top with it to where she gets unconformable.

When she flaked the first 3 times, did she call you or text you telling u she is busy? I recently got flaked with no reason yet. Thx

Author:  ilovenyc [ Tue Jan 25, 2011 4:35 pm ]
Post subject: 

All communication thus far has been via text (I should've called day after but was hung over and not thinking clearly).

I think the situations not completely lost but it seems like an uphill battle due to the three week delay between meeting her and having the three flakes. I normally don't like to go into these things where I've actually had to chase the girl and like to make myself the prize; will be tough to pull that frame off in this situation.

Author:  furiousracer313 [ Tue Jan 25, 2011 5:50 pm ]
Post subject: 

It may be tough, but still possible. Just relax and think about the date, dont look back on the 3 flakes. Let me know how ur date goes.

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