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| How to proceed - just wants fun and not relationship https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=53&t=80110 |
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| Author: | Conker [ Wed Dec 01, 2010 4:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | How to proceed - just wants fun and not relationship |
It's great because I don't want a relationship either. She's very hot, obviously quite popular, bit of a hippy. But I totally wooed her in the street and we swapped numbers. Things could have gone better but I got slack/complacent/uncertain and didn't call when I should have, I reckon. We've met once since - for a quick lunch. Her body language was good - she stayed close - leant into me when I hugged her sideways, thanked me for coming, and had a bit of a spring in her step after I left. Whenever I called, she either picks up, or txts back later apologising for missing my call. I think I've quite possibly let things drag out a bit. Due to not wanting to call too much. But I think I should have called more and had better inner game to support that. So things have fizzled a bit afaik. For the first time, she didn't reply to my txt. Admittedly it's PROBABLY not a big deal - but I'm looking to make sure this one doesn't go awry. Also the text was pretty dumb. I vaguely remember her wanting to see Harry Potter (I may have been mistaken) and after it rang out, I sent a text saying "Just looking for someone who interested in seeing Harry Potter and hasn't seen it yet..." Anyway - last time we had a talk (before that text), she told me she'd just gotten out of a 4 year relationship. I said "You told me that to let me know you don't want to get into another one soon" she said "Yes" I said "Cool because neither do I" and we talked about how fun it is to be single, I mentioned some of my female friends, and and she let something slip, she said "Yep I certainly have my... yep... yep..." and she just trailed off awkwardly. I laughed - to me it sounded like she wanted to let me know there are "other guys", this is fine with me. Just looking for a vibe, a style, a way to approach this. I've never really flirted with a girl who actually potentially just wanted to "have fun". I've been too used to keeping them at a distance when they wanted a relationship. |
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| Author: | Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Wed Dec 01, 2010 5:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
"You know, I think the way society works is really fucked up. If a guy goes around having loads of women [you can self-point here for a bit of NLP], he's a casanova and is generally respected by other men. If a girl does the same thing [do NOT point at her], even her girlfriends will call her a slut. I think that's wrong, don't you? (If she doesn't say yes, something's wrong) The way I see it, I think we need to separate sex from love from relationships. They're all different. I think a guy and girl [point to you and her] should be able to enjoy each other sexually, then if it's good and they get on, they can have a relationship, and then if they find their both sexually and emotionally and intellectually compatible, then you can start talking about commitment and love, but not until then." |
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| Author: | Conker [ Wed Dec 01, 2010 11:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Ah yes, that angle! I like that story, have said it many times, but not nessecarily in that way. I like the subliminal stuff you mentioned - naturally it needs to be said honestly, which I can do because I already believe everything you just said. I did feel like I had to "lay the cards out on the table" because I do get the vibe she is unsure about what I want to do still. She even offered for me to come over and watch DVDs, but has been holding back on that one. Thanks heaps. Hm just - how to bring it up. I think the time for working it into the conversation was back then, maybe we are still due for another similar conversation and I could work it in still. I don't think I should build up to it / draw attention to it by saying "hey we need to have a chat, when's a good time to call" etc. Do you agree? |
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| Author: | Ryan Black SashaPUA [ Wed Dec 01, 2010 11:59 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote:
I don't think I should build up to it / draw attention to it by saying "hey we need to have a chat, when's a good time to call" etc.
That's right. You're having a conversation about how society's norms are screwed up, maybe in the context of male-female interactions or something. Areas like psychology, male/female dynamics, past relationships, etc. are great subjects to bring up because girls always have a lot of opinions, and you can easily turn the conversation sexual very quickly.I can't imagine a situation where it's ever better to say "we need to have a serious conversation" than it is to just bring it up in the context of a story and see what she says. |
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| Author: | Conker [ Thu Dec 02, 2010 2:51 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Hahah "you can easily turn those conversations sexual very quickly" had those words echoing in my head tonight when I was out. Good news - I called her while I was walking to the next club - alone, in a lion costume (like something out of Cats) was a dress up party, I got approached in the street so many times by girls wanting a photo with me, and I was talking to HER on the phone, and she heard it all - all the girls flirting etc. So much DHV that she invited me out there and then, to a harry potter movie next saturday, without me even asking. And she said we should dress up. Hahah. I'll let you know how the conversation goes... thanks for the vibe. |
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