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Help me calibrate this - "we'll see what happens"!
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Author:  atestsn [ Mon Mar 16, 2009 1:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Help me calibrate this - "we'll see what happens"!
Hi,

This is my first post. I have read a lot of pua material, but I am having this problem: I have been seeing this girl (who's actually an old friend) about once a week for the last month. Sometimes it seems like she's really into me, and sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes we hook up, and sometimes we don't. I have been having a verrery difficult time figuring out how she feels about our situation, so last night I figures be a man and just ask her (afc mistake??). I told her she was hard to read and told her I really like her and asked how she felt about the situation, and she replied that she just figured we'd "wait and see what happens.". So my questions are: WTF did that mean??? What should I do from here??

Thanks for your help!
Author:  Stetson [ Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
Well you weren't actually blown away even though you did a stupid thing back there. Actually it was kind of a positive answer.

And to answer you'r question...

Escalate to kiss.
Author:  atestsn [ Mon Mar 16, 2009 2:44 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Well you weren't actually blown away even though you did a stupid thing back there. Actually it was kind of a positive answer.

And to answer you'r question...

Escalate to kiss.
Thanks for your input. I've already been kissing her and hooking up with her - that's not really the issue. I just can't tell how into it she is. Anyway, glad you think it wasn't a bad response. Any other thoughts guys???
Author:  Flashpoint24 [ Mon Mar 16, 2009 9:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
if you're hooking up and she's not committing yet...then one possibility is "we'll see what happens"...really just means she enjoys your physical presence and the physical attention...but she hasn't made the emotional connection with you. I'd continue to try and connect with her on a deeper level if you want a relationship with her...She is definitely stalling for time and probably doesn't know what she wants yet.
Author:  atestsn [ Tue Mar 17, 2009 12:36 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
if you're hooking up and she's not committing yet...then one possibility is "we'll see what happens"...really just means she enjoys your physical presence and the physical attention...but she hasn't made the emotional connection with you. I'd continue to try and connect with her on a deeper level if you want a relationship with her...She is definitely stalling for time and probably doesn't know what she wants yet.
Thanks. I thought that could be it too. This is going to sounds strange for these forums, but I do really like her, and I want more than just hooking up. Any tips on how to try and connect with her on a deeper level?
Author:  bot [ Tue Mar 17, 2009 7:10 pm ]
Post subject: 
Yeah, she is committed to seeing you. I would txt / call her more and make sure you are always on her mind.

I personally wouldn't of asked what she thinks - in time you'll be able to gauge it based on her response. But like they said she didnt flat out say no she 'wants to see how things develop'

Just assume that she said yes, and act as though she did. What would you do in that situation?

If you have any other specific questions, reply em here

Cheers,
Author:  atestsn [ Wed Mar 18, 2009 2:28 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Yeah, she is committed to seeing you. I would txt / call her more and make sure you are always on her mind.

I personally wouldn't of asked what she thinks - in time you'll be able to gauge it based on her response. But like they said she didnt flat out say no she 'wants to see how things develop'

Just assume that she said yes, and act as though she did. What would you do in that situation?

If you have any other specific questions, reply em here

Cheers,
Thanks - I think this is really good advice. I like the idea of just assuming that she said yes and acting accordingly.

Here's an update: I figured I'd push-pull a bit so after calling her I didn't call or text her anything for a while, and a day and a half later, she randomly re-opened me by txting me something about her work. I'm guessing that's a good sign/IOI, right?
Author:  Fathom [ Thu Mar 19, 2009 1:00 am ]
Post subject: 
Proper roles here are totally reversed! She made a sweet play off your slightly AFC move, and got you hanging at the end of her pinky finger, waiting for her. Step up and assume the masculine role in this relationship before she finds someone else to fool around with. She should be waiting on YOU. Specifically, this means neg the crap out of her. Also tempt her with light kino that leaves her wanting more. I would agree to talk to her a lot to ensure that you're always on her mind, but be very careful to always assert control of the convo, and not make it look as if you're begging for her.

gl :D
Author:  atestsn [ Thu Mar 19, 2009 1:50 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Proper roles here are totally reversed! She made a sweet play off your slightly AFC move, and got you hanging at the end of her pinky finger, waiting for her. Step up and assume the masculine role in this relationship before she finds someone else to fool around with. She should be waiting on YOU. Specifically, this means neg the crap out of her. Also tempt her with light kino that leaves her wanting more. I would agree to talk to her a lot to ensure that you're always on her mind, but be very careful to always assert control of the convo, and not make it look as if you're begging for her.

gl :D
Thanks, I was afraid of that. I'll give negging a shot. I haven't contacted her in a couple of days, so that should be a neg in and of itsself, right?
Author:  Thymology [ Thu Mar 19, 2009 8:07 pm ]
Post subject: 
I think the best thing you could do here is display pre-selection. Even if she's your target start flirting with others girls. Better yet, go out somewhere and have a good topic ready. Start discussing it w/ her and then say something like "alright, hold up" and then open other HBs with an opinion opener on the same topic. Let her see you gaming other hot girls and you'll see her get jealous in a flash. You don't have to get a # from the other hot girls but get them attracted to you right IN FRONT of the target.

Remember not to send the other HBs any IOIs unless they send one to you first. That way if none of them are attracted to you it'll seem like nothing other than you trying to settle a dispute w/ your girl and you can eject safely.
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