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| Interested in hearing opinions on this https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=53&t=33897 |
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| Author: | intron [ Sat Dec 06, 2008 3:56 am ] |
| Post subject: | Interested in hearing opinions on this |
First off, I don't really care what happens with this one cuz I've got a couple other buns in the oven (I'm really starting to get the hang of this stuff!). But I think what I will describe below is a situation that I could have capitalized on but made a couple mistakes. So, I was tutoring someone at a starbucks a few weeks ago, and I guess these three HBs next to me thought it was really adorable or something (I was talking with lots of gestures, loudly and confidently b/c, well, it's my job). They all wrote their numbers on an index card and put it in my backpack, so that made for a good morning present the next day! Anyways, called one of them. Went through texting back and forth a couple times. A week or so later I get a call from one of them, and she's at a bar with one of the other ones, clearly drunk, and asks me to come. I couldn't so she said we should hang out another time and that was that. Anyways, I sent her a text (I know I should have called, but I have been genuienly busy during the day the past couple weeks and texting is way easier for me) asking if she wanted to go out this friday or next thursday. I figured that might make me look busy and whatnot (which I am, but either way). She responds saying she's busy this weekend but maybe next week, and asks what I had in mind. I reply the next day saying we should go to the comedy club then just go out to the bars afterward. A day or two later she replies saying sorry but she just started seeing someone, I'm flattered, blah blah. I responded with something like, "Haha no sweat. I'm probably not what you're looking for anyway (freshly single)." I figured she's either telling the truth, shit testing me, or just lost interest at some point (maybe cuz I didn't call?). I also figured my last response would either make me look like I wasn't really interested in a girl like her (the "can't have me" thing) or maybe came off as just looking for sex (oh well). But whatever. Where did I make mistakes? What do you think is really going on? I'm basically just curious for the sake of improving my game more, which is what it's all about right? |
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| Author: | Sexcellent [ Sat Dec 06, 2008 6:48 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Interested in hearing opinions on this |
Quote: I sent her a text (I know I should have called, but I have been genuienly busy during the day the past couple weeks and texting is way easier for me) asking if she wanted to go out this friday or next thursday.
mistake 1 - you asked her and gave her options to choose day x or day y. you can't do that with girls. you can't put the decision on them like that. their brain explodes. you have to let HER follow YOUR lead. next time probe her to see when she's free and then fire your guns by telling her when and where to meet you.Quote: She responds saying she's busy this weekend but maybe next week, and asks what I had in mind.
mistake 2 - i think you put too much pressure on the day 2 being like a date. you want to be specific about when and where it's going to be, but you want it to be a low commitment meeting for her so that she doesn't have to spend too much time with you if she is uncomfortable.I reply the next day saying we should go to the comedy club then just go out to the bars afterward. A day or two later she replies saying sorry but she just started seeing someone, I'm flattered, blah blah. Quote: I responded with something like, "Haha no sweat. I'm probably not what you're looking for anyway (freshly single).".
mistake 3 - i'm sure you didn't mean it this way, but it really does sound very needy/desperate/defeated/insecure/unconfident.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i think you need to improve your phone/text game and understand time bridging a lil better. sometimes hb's will go stale after a certain amount of time. the only way to fix that is with properly stated and well timed communications over the phone or text. it's not easy to do this. the best advice i can give is try to have her re-enter the emotional state she was in when she was all about you, and get her to commit to seeing you again based on that. be the prize and make her want to chase you. |
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