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What this girl thinking?
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Author:  Macine [ Mon Nov 10, 2008 5:23 pm ]
Post subject:  What this girl thinking?
Met this girl last Thursday. It was my first time back in the game in like 6 months, after getting out of my LTR. So my game was rusty, and was just a mediocre pickup.

Ended up getting her number and texted a funny comment/joke to her the next day (Friday). She replied to that a few hours later, and I said it was too bad we didnt start talking earlier, we could have gone and seen this comedian that was on that night.
She replied "Sorry bout that. I was working. We could always go to the pub one night I suppose. Hope you have a good weekend planned :)"

So my next text was today (a rainy Monday) and I invited her to come to salsa lessons with me.
She replied "Hi, shall we meet for coffee later in the week as its too horrid out. And i have two left feet. Ha Ha"

I asked her what day she was free, she said Thurs, which was perfect for me. I suggested a local pub with a nice SPAM.
She replied "Is it ok if its in town, would be better for me. I'm not really wanting anything at the moment so if you are, I don't want to give you the wrong impression. Just want to be honest."

So she agreed to meet me on Thursday at the place we met at. But I just wanna know what the womans mind is thinking? I am not after anything myself, just want to practice a day 2.
Author:  greenhorn [ Mon Nov 10, 2008 8:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
This sounds like a perfect chance to PRACTICE day 2's. I'm in a similar position. Even if she doesn't want a relationship with you, it seems like she's into you enough to want to get a drink or two. Use this opportunity to practice for the next girl you try to get with, you said you're rusty right?

best of luck
Author:  Psych_ [ Tue Nov 11, 2008 3:19 am ]
Post subject: 
If you look at this interaction it's filled with you seeking compliance and her rejecting and then leading the interaction which you then let her. One of the key traits that causes attraction is leadership.

She's comfortable with you but at no point did you break rapport or show her a willingness to walk away, therefore she's now gradually putting you into the friend zone. The reason she also bluntly said she doesn't want anything at the moment is because she doesn't want to feel guilty like she's leading you on. She thinks you're a nice sweet guy probably but like the girl I'm currently hooking up with now just told me "I can't stand passive guys...I need them to be a bit aggressive".

Honestly the whole meeting up for the day 2 thing was my biggest sticking point for a while for the exact same reason. What eventually happened was I just honestly stopped caring and quit being pushy, if I sensed hesitation or bad compliance I'd just start a new set.

Also a powerful way to ensure less flakes is the idea of positive momentum theory. Call the girl just to talk to her and joke around, get to know her a bit without pushing for a day 2. I might call or text every day or once ever three days depending on the girl until the day 2. A lot of guys might think this is needy behavior and chasing but the thing is I know that the more I interact with her the more attracted she'll be to me. This also builds more comfort and investment and also keeps you on her mind more (mental investment).

Hope this helps

Psych
Author:  shadyb [ Thu Nov 13, 2008 12:09 am ]
Post subject: 
i agree with Psych_. on your day 2 you are going to need to hit her with some negs from the get go, and dhv. you seriously need to walk around the pub like you are ten feet tall and bullet proof. you are way behind in the count, the way i see it. best of luck pulling this off, either way it will be good practice.
Author:  V1V [ Thu Nov 13, 2008 6:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
If you look at this interaction it's filled with you seeking compliance and her rejecting and then leading the interaction which you then let her. One of the key traits that causes attraction is leadership.

She's comfortable with you but at no point did you break rapport or show her a willingness to walk away, therefore she's now gradually putting you into the friend zone. The reason she also bluntly said she doesn't want anything at the moment is because she doesn't want to feel guilty like she's leading you on. She thinks you're a nice sweet guy probably but like the girl I'm currently hooking up with now just told me "I can't stand passive guys...I need them to be a bit aggressive".

Honestly the whole meeting up for the day 2 thing was my biggest sticking point for a while for the exact same reason. What eventually happened was I just honestly stopped caring and quit being pushy, if I sensed hesitation or bad compliance I'd just start a new set.

Also a powerful way to ensure less flakes is the idea of positive momentum theory. Call the girl just to talk to her and joke around, get to know her a bit without pushing for a day 2. I might call or text every day or once ever three days depending on the girl until the day 2. A lot of guys might think this is needy behavior and chasing but the thing is I know that the more I interact with her the more attracted she'll be to me. This also builds more comfort and investment and also keeps you on her mind more (mental investment).

Hope this helps

Psych
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