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Next day
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Author:  Omega [ Tue Nov 04, 2008 1:01 am ]
Post subject:  Next day

I got a k-close from a girl I went to HS with. I didnt get her number, but I am facebook friends with her. I was wondering what I should write to her?

She lives in the city and I live about an hour out side, so there is not chance of me bumping into her again. I need something quick before to much time passes. I see her friends a lot b/c they still live around me, but she never comes and visits. Im not sure If i want to ask her out yet. Id rather keep it casual for a few messages.

Any suggestions?

Author:  Swoop [ Tue Nov 04, 2008 10:29 am ]
Post subject: 

I would make some shit up.... Send her a private message along the lines..

I'm gonna be in the city doing (yatta yatta) on (such and such). Would be cool to see you when I'm done for a little bit if your interested. If not, I'll meet up with some other girl and just pretend its you. Hopefully she not as cute, otherwise I might forget to keep pretending :)

At this point all you can do is throw out an IOI without seeming desperate. Its pretty much a take it or leave it approach. I don't have a magic bullet but something close to the above should give you a decent shot at getting a number and a Day2. If not, you gotta forget it till you run into her again :T

Author:  Omega [ Tue Nov 04, 2008 11:59 pm ]
Post subject: 

I think I will run into her during t-giving b/c everyone from my HS goes to this one bar. So, at least ill see her than.

Im gonna shoot her a message along these lines- Hey, that was a pretty drunken Halloween. Just seeing what you are up. Maybe we will bump into each other over thanksgiving.

Thanks for the help though

Author:  Omega [ Thu Nov 06, 2008 11:03 pm ]
Post subject: 

So, This is the convo on f-book so far....

Omega: Hey, that was a pretty drunken Halloween. Just seeing what you are up. Maybe we will bump into each other over thanksgiving.
-Later

HB: Hey, It was a great Halloween! Ill be home for Thanksgiving so I'm sure will bump into each other if I don't see you before that.

So, it seems like she wants to see me again. Where should I go from here?

Only thing is im going to be away on Saturday and also for most of next week. I might be in her area tomorrow night.

Should I go with

A) Ask for # and tell her I might be in her neck of the woods tomorrow night and I'll shoot her a message if i am.

B) Leave it till t-giving but shoot her a few messages to keep interest level up. If B please give an example of where to go from here. or

C) Something else

Author:  Swoop [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 10:17 am ]
Post subject: 

Ok man.. heres the deal. I feel like youre starting to get one-itis over this chick. I know you like her, yatta yatta, but you have to act like its not that big of a deal no matter what the outcome is. That mindset in turn will be attractive to her and you have a better chance, although counter intuitive to all the scenarios youre running through.

Keep it simple "I know we will probably run into eachother over thanksgiving but whats your number? I'm thinking I might be in your area before then and we could probably catch up for a bit. aslong as you don't mind hanging out with my invisible friend who is a total jerk when he meets new people."

It sounds like shes into you so understand shes 99% likely to be perfectly fine giving you her number. OR

You could just play it cool till you actually do run into her, with playful messages over FB. Either way, it comes down to how quickly you want to become intimate with this girl. The ball is always in your court.

Personally, I'm a fan of offering no commitment invitations, ex. I'm gonna be at such and such on thursday after this and that. It would be fun if you went.

This shows you wouldn't mind hanging out or not. either way, you are in your own reality. Girls are looking to be invited to the party, they dont want to BE the party. Don't be bummed if she says no tho, because it should not affect you either way.

Post updates

Author:  Omega [ Fri Nov 07, 2008 10:57 pm ]
Post subject: 

Thanks a lot for the help. I'm actually not gonna see her until thanksgiving, my plans fell through.

What are some good canned FB messages that will keep her interested? Thanksgiving is two weeks away, so i'd like to send her two maybe three messages to keep the interest level up and not seem too into her.

Author:  pushyouredge [ Sat Nov 08, 2008 9:59 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Thanks a lot for the help. I'm actually not gonna see her until thanksgiving, my plans fell through.

What are some good canned FB messages that will keep her interested? Thanksgiving is two weeks away, so i'd like to send her two maybe three messages to keep the interest level up and not seem too into her.
Canned Facebook lines aren't gonna help you. Changing up your mindset will. Don't worry, I'm not going to give you bad news without giving you a good (field-tested) solution.

I don't think you realized it, but you set yourself back on the first FB message:
Quote:
Omega: Hey, that was a pretty drunken Halloween. Just seeing what you are up. Maybe we will bump into each other over thanksgiving.
-Later
The sub communication is that you two kissed because it was a "drunken Halloween", not because she was attracted to you.

That's a lot different than saying something like, "Hey troublemaker - Damn, you were something else at the party hehe" and leaving it at that.

The follow-up is also not helpful, "Just seeing what you're up to. Maybe we'll bump into each other again." I don't know why, but it reads with a degree of desperation. To me, it reads like, "Hey, you were drunk and you probably weren't actually interested in me, but I am interested in you and maybe if you are actually interested in me you'll throw me a bone or something."

I know that you don't want to hear that, but I am saying it to help you as best I can.
Quote:
HB: Hey, It was a great Halloween! Ill be home for Thanksgiving so I'm sure will bump into each other if I don't see you before that.
Her response is polite, but it doesn't have any flirty characteristics. There's no ";)" or "lol" or anything like that. It's neutral.

You're not cooked, but you need to shift your mindset - you're making something small into something bigger... You are investing your thought into seeing her as the prize and then trying to figure out how to capture that prize. A much better solution would be to see yourself as the prize (even if it feels unnatural or even psychotic at first) and baiting her into seeing YOU as the prize.

What would I do? I would send her one more message and say, "Definitely... Send me your number and we'll hang out this Thanksgiving."

And then I would make it my MISSION to go out and meet as many women as possible. You will have so much more power if you have multiple women to focus on. If you are interested in only one women, your mind will naturally slip into seeing her as a prize and chasing her.

I am sharing all this with you because I have been in your shoes before, definitely more than a handful of times. And yeah, disappointment did it's part in polishing my game, but I want to try and save you the heartache if I can.

Good luck.

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