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2nd date went well - but what now?
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Author:  Portugal.Thy.Man [ Mon Oct 19, 2015 7:58 pm ]
Post subject:  2nd date went well - but what now?
What up guys!

So I ended up taking this girl from one of my classes to a 2nd coffee date today. One hour in and I k-close. From there onward it's make out sessions every 10 min. I take her to college, my arm around her all the time, then I kiss her again, I tell her "Aight, talk to you later" and we each go our way.

She seemed perfectly fine with me having my arm around her and kissing her in front of everyone.
Now I want to push for an f-close.

3 questions regarding this:

1 - Tomorrow I have classes with her again. How should I interact with when her friends are looking
(and generally everyone in class)? I mean, do you guys think it's better to act like we did today (kiss normally) or just be a little cautious and greet her like a friend?

2 - Since I told her "I'll talk to you later", did that imply she's expecting a text from me until the end of day? I'm seeing her tomorrow still, do you think it's wise to text until then?

And 3 - If I want to invite her to a movie date at my place for tomorrow night, do I do that by text or in person? Take into account that I'll have class with her at the end of the evening and I want to have her over at night.

Thanks in advance!
Author:  R.C [ Tue Oct 20, 2015 7:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Quote:
What up guys!

So I ended up taking this girl from one of my classes to a 2nd coffee date today. One hour in and I k-close. From there onward it's make out sessions every 10 min. I take her to college, my arm around her all the time, then I kiss her again, I tell her "Aight, talk to you later" and we each go our way.

She seemed perfectly fine with me having my arm around her and kissing her in front of everyone.
Now I want to push for an f-close.

3 questions regarding this:

1 - Tomorrow I have classes with her again. How should I interact with when her friends are looking
(and generally everyone in class)? I mean, do you guys think it's better to act like we did today (kiss normally) or just be a little cautious and greet her like a friend?

2 - Since I told her "I'll talk to you later", did that imply she's expecting a text from me until the end of day? I'm seeing her tomorrow still, do you think it's wise to text until then?

And 3 - If I want to invite her to a movie date at my place for tomorrow night, do I do that by text or in person? Take into account that I'll have class with her at the end of the evening and I want to have her over at night.

Thanks in advance!
1. Personally I dislike this kind of displays at the workplace/class. It's highly unprofessional and straight up cheesy. So if you see her around campus that's one thing, but I wouldn't go shoving my tongue down her throat in class, in front of all your colleagues.

2. Does "see you later" imply you're gonna do it by the end of the day? of-course it doesn't. It's an expression. Read my texting guide if you're having issues in that area, but in short, text whenever you want and if you want. Don't do it out of obligation, out of boredom or whatever other reason other than you want to.

3. Never ask anything over text if you have the option of doing it in person. When you walk out of class casually tell her to come over for netflix and chill. Don't make a big deal out of it and if she says she can't just say: "A'right, another time then".

You're overthinking. I did answer your questions just to provide some perspective, but #3 is the only kind of legit one. #1 and #2 are just mental masturbation.
Author:  Portugal.Thy.Man [ Tue Oct 20, 2015 1:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Thanks man!

Yeah, when I think about it, those 2 first questions came out of sheer nervousness on my part.

Really good answers, will keep them for later.

Sadly, it's probably over with this one. She sent a text at night basically saying "listen, I don't know how and what happened today's morning. I'm really sorry for that. It wasn't me actually, I have never let boys do it. You were charming. I didn't say that I don't like it, but it's not right, not good. I know you will be mad having read this, but I don't think you*ll understand me" (for context, she's Bi)

Luckily, a really awesome dude heard my pleas last night in the chat and prevented me from making it worse. Here's what I texted her: "Hey, sometimes what feels wrong can feel so right... It's cool. We were just having fun, no big deal. You're a lucky girl for kissing me ;)"

Seriously, I don't think I can even count how many times you guys saved my ass haha
Author:  R.C [ Tue Oct 20, 2015 1:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Who suggested you say that?
Author:  Portugal.Thy.Man [ Tue Oct 20, 2015 1:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Quote:
Who suggested you say that?
I can't recall his name right now, but why?

Was that line so bad? I honestly think it conveyed that I wasn't really mad at her, that it's no big deal...
Author:  R.C [ Tue Oct 20, 2015 2:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Wasnt that bad, except I don't like the last part.
Quote:
You're a lucky girl for kissing me ;)
Author:  Portugal.Thy.Man [ Tue Oct 20, 2015 2:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Quote:
Wasnt that bad, except I don't like the last part.
Quote:
You're a lucky girl for kissing me ;)
At first I thought that part was kinda weird, but I kinda see it as "lightening the mood a bit".
Author:  DrEthanGregory [ Thu Oct 22, 2015 2:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
You did fine brother. I am not a fan of emoticons, but to each their own. There are going to be times when girls pull back because they might start to feel some guilt for being to natural or going with their impulses over their fear of being judged. I would check in with this girl in a few days, I still think she might be interested in more than just a make out session. Play it cool, and see if she wants to have a study date somewhere in public again. Friend zone her for a while, and then bring up your attraction after she is feeling safer about herself around you. Good luck.
Dr Ethan Gregory
@drethangregory
http://www.drethangregory.com
[http://www.amazon.com/dp/099678196X]
Author:  kart36 [ Thu Oct 22, 2015 4:52 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
I would be dubious...
Saying I want her, but showing I dont give a fuck for her... Always showing confidance.
Author:  Portugal.Thy.Man [ Thu Oct 22, 2015 8:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Both doc and kart make good points.

Next time I talk to her should be Monday, which is exactly 7 days after this little incident. I was thinking of inviting her to coffee like it was normal, and then ask her to clarify on what she meant by that text... Do you guys think that's the right move? I mean, I could also act normal, not asking anything, but then how would I know where we stand?
Author:  R.C [ Fri Oct 23, 2015 7:02 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd date went well - but what now?
Asking people to explain themselves is the same as calling them out. Save that shit for relationships, when you're actually entitled to it.

Anyway, there's a million different reasons for why she may have said what she said. If you make a big deal out of it, it won't end well for you.
Treat her as if nothing happened. If she complies, cool. If not, find someone who knows what they want.

Be willing to fold a losing hand.
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