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A story of dancing: Need advices
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Author:  TrafalgarLaw [ Tue May 26, 2015 5:03 pm ]
Post subject:  A story of dancing: Need advices
Good morning Guys il post this little story to learn how to correct my mistakes
I'm motivated and ready to progress

2 weeks ago i started taking salsa class, I really enjoy the dancing and you can meet a lot of people particularly women ;)

Then at a lesson I meet a HB8 that i knew from another group of friends, We don't know much about each other. Basically in the past i used to hang out in the same bar with my friends.

After few lesson we start talking. I was dancing with her and other girls, took her number.
After a lesson I told her :
Dancing is a lot about practicing , we should dance at a practice night (same place)
She said : okk let me know where and when..

The next course I invited her to dance on a Friday a special event at our dancing school. She told me that she got a birthday party that day but she will come and if it's okk if she brings her friends too so she will leave with them after the dance session with me

I say yes of course no problem..

Friday came and I was 30 min late (miss my bus)
She was texting me asking me all along to know where I was. When I arrived I apologize for the delay and say hello to every one( kiss in the cheek), she was there with 2 friends.
Well her friend didn't stop bitching , taking her to "dance" between girls, asking me weird questions.. Anyway We didn't dance that much ( 2 times actually) plus there were 3 chair around their table...i took another table and sit with guys from my class...
At the end I left the place with the boys... Tell her that I have something to do before I leave she ask me to come to her birthday party next week, I said yes, she was surprised in a good way.

Few days later I saw her at the next lesson she re invited me at her birthday party + on Facebook event, at the end I couldn't go because I had to go to New York for this weekend..
I texted her at my return she answer a week later lol
Next week I was texting her about my great week end and after few text she told me that she missed dancing.. I ask her out on Monday for dancing.

Monday arrive and we dance, had some fun but nothing really happened to be honest I haven't any problem opening, get the girl comfortable With me, I'm having trouble to show my interested sexually

I learn she told me she will travel for 2 months in fews days I need to make a critical moves before she leaves
How can I can switch the balance, do you have advices Guys?

Appreciate !
Author:  R.C [ Fri May 29, 2015 12:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A story of dancing: Need advices
Quote:
but she will come and if it's okk if she brings her friends too so she will leave with them after the dance session with me

I say yes of course no problem..
Are you sure you're sexually interested in her? Because responding "yes, ofcourse you can bring your friends to what I wanted to be a date between the two of us" is hardly what I'd call letting her know what's up.
This is exactly why I always said girls never friendzone a guy. Guys friendzone themselves.

Besides, you're asking her out to "practice dancing" when in reality you want to practice something entirely different. You're not framing these meet-ups as dates because you're hiding behind the curtain of you two sharing a hobby.

You're not being honest to your own desires and as a consequence you're playing it safe. Your problem isn't how to convey sexual interest, it's being afraid to convey sexual interest.

Ask her out on a proper date. Go bowling, laugh at fat people at the mall or drinks at your favorite bar. Then invite her over to hang out a bit more and escalate. Personally though, I wouldn't hold my breath with this one.
Author:  Dragula [ Fri May 29, 2015 12:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A story of dancing: Need advices
I haven't read RC's reply but I'm sure my post will be of similar points...

This is a simple case of lack of intentions. You're hiding behind the dancing and using that as an excuse to get a girl's number.

If you were to say you want more than dancing and to take her for a drink then she knows your intention is to get to know her in a romantic dynamic.

She still might be interested though so you will have to make a move next time you hang out. Please sure it's just YOU and HER only. No friends. That is not a date dynamic. That is called a salsa social circle.

Dont confuse seduction with salsa
Author:  Eddie Fews [ Fri May 29, 2015 3:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A story of dancing: Need advices
To me it sounds like the only thing you need to do is ask her out.


Seeing her in dance class is cool and all, but if you genuinely have interest in the girl why haven't you asked to see her outside of dance class?

Sounds like the attraction could be fading like most you come to the forum or ask for advice once you've already wasted too much time before taking action and the women begin taking their interest else where.

Text her or call her man. Tell her you want to meet her for coffee. But do something. Otherwise you just become the guy at dance class. Things have to have outside the confines of that dance studio or it will all be for nothing if it isn't already.

Take action immediately. As soon as you see this.
Author:  TrafalgarLaw [ Fri Jun 05, 2015 4:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: A story of dancing: Need advices
Thank you Guys for the answers much Appreciated!

To be honnest when you Guys say that: "You're not being honest to your own desires and as a consequence you're playing it safe. Your problem isn't how to convey sexual interest, it's being afraid to convey sexual interest."

When I take a step back...that's kinda true, Well I guess that I see her more like a potential serious girlfriend then just a one time hit, and I want it to do it so right that my game collapsed very bad.

Plus, I will take her on a date out of the salsa's context to make it more intimate.

She already travelled, but I'm putting this file on hold and I will get back to it!

Very honest and useful advice guys!

Thxx
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