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Had decent date, need some ideas on next move
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Author:  Mattr1984 [ Fri May 17, 2013 12:29 am ]
Post subject:  Had decent date, need some ideas on next move

I met this girl at a bar last Saturday night as I was leaving (to watch my beloved City lose to Wigan in the FA cup final lol), so I quickly number closed. Set up a date for last night, it went OK she laughed when I teased her, tried to qualify herself (I told her I'm a football fanatic, she told me a few cool stories), I was a little tired from work so wasn't totally on my game plus I had a few nerves (hottest girl I've been out with since getting out of a long termer). We chatted for a couple of hours over a couple of drinks, at the end of the night I asked her if she'd like to hang out again, she said yes definitely (those exact words, but then again I've had enough experience to know that this doesn't make it a given).

I kino'd a little bit but no kiss or anything (didnt feel right).

Anyway, it's now the next day and I wanted to plan my next move carefully. I was thinking of waiting until tomorrow (mini freeze out) then texting with something like "hey nerd, how was work last night?" Going to go out and game tonight, so I'm not in a hurry but she is quite hot and can hold a decent conversation so I'd like to maximise my odds of hanging out again.

Any suggestions?

Author:  RiRi [ Fri May 17, 2013 3:57 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Had decent date, need some ideas on next move

Progress looks fine based on your description.

The one thing I would do is tap into any “inside jokes” or anything that you were able to develop in conversing with her (for example, a funny aspect of a story she told) and incorporate that into the messaging. This elicits a reaction from her (“OMG HAHA”) that will break any strange tension, if there was any. Little inside jokes/topics are very intimate and engaging. So instead of “nerd”, try something like “Hey bath salts fiend, lets go rock climbing next weekend.” (IF you had talked about bath salts, etc.) Just incorporate a funny episode, words, characters into your interaction with her and it will take you a long way.

You already know this: the more she laughs and has fun with you, the more she will want to hang out and thus, more attraction. Most importantly, have fun, she’ll notice.

Author:  Mattr1984 [ Fri May 17, 2013 4:10 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Had decent date, need some ideas on next move

Quote:
Progress looks fine based on your description.

The one thing I would do is tap into any “inside jokes” or anything that you were able to develop in conversing with her (for example, a funny aspect of a story she told) and incorporate that into the messaging. This elicits a reaction from her (“OMG HAHA”) that will break any strange tension, if there was any. Little inside jokes/topics are very intimate and engaging. So instead of “nerd”, try something like “Hey bath salts fiend, lets go rock climbing next weekend.” (IF you had talked about bath salts, etc.) Just incorporate a funny episode, words, characters into your interaction with her and it will take you a long way.

You already know this: the more she laughs and has fun with you, the more she will want to hang out and thus, more attraction. Most importantly, have fun, she’ll notice.

Thanks man, good advice. I should add, her being a nerd was actually something we talked about. I kind of DQed her on it though (basically teased her for not being nerdy enough after she claimed to be one).

Actually you do give me an idea, one of the things she talked about was a horible date she had with a guy that reminded her of the dudes on jersey shore. How about something like "hey nerd, just drove past a tanning salon and a hat store (part of the story she will laugh) and it made me think of you. Ever been rock climbing?" (Kudos on the awesome second date idea btw).

Author:  RiRi [ Fri May 17, 2013 4:27 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Had decent date, need some ideas on next move

Quote:
Thanks man, good advice. I should add, her being a nerd was actually something we talked about. I kind of DQed her on it though (basically teased her for not being nerdy enough after she claimed to be one).
Perfect. Just remember not to dwell on the one inside joke, make sure to keep refining it with new inside jokes to escalate the engagement and keep things fresh.
Quote:
Actually you do give me an idea, one of the things she talked about was a horible date she had with a guy that reminded her of the dudes on jersey shore. How about something like "hey nerd, just drove past a tanning salon and a hat store (part of the story she will laugh) and it made me think of you. Ever been rock climbing?" (Kudos on the awesome second date idea btw).
Again, perfect. By citing a shitty date, and you planning awesome ones, you are effectively using the shitty one as a stepping stone to making yourself look that much more of a cool dude. It’s a great situation for you, and one that you can control (which is all that a man can ask for at this point).

Can try this too, “Hey nerd, about to get my GTHS on. Let’s go rock climbing.”
her: GTHS?
You: Yeah, gym, tan, hat-shopping. I want to feel sexy when trying on hats.

Its ultra-dry, but also self-deprecating. A good combo if you have the ball in your court. She’ll most likely respond by laughing and/or calling you a dork. To which you can always respond, “dorks are so much cooler than nerds though.”

It just creates a situation where shes chasing you while you fire off sarcastic, intimacy building jokes/phrases. And then after a while, you show a deeper side to yourself and instantly you’ve become a multi-dimensional, cool guy persona. She wont be able to get enough. The rock climbing will be a walk in the park if the attraction is already super high.

Author:  Mattr1984 [ Fri May 17, 2013 4:33 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Had decent date, need some ideas on next move

Haha GTHS is hilarious... Not sure if she'd get it though (don't know if she actually watched the show or not so I'd rather not risk it). Still very funny

Thanks for the advice man. Very helpful.

Author:  Crypto [ Fri May 17, 2013 1:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Had decent date, need some ideas on next move

"I kino'd a little bit but no kiss or anything (didnt feel right)." - Didn't feel right??? Did you want to kiss her? I ask because if the answer is "yes" then it DID feel right! Remeber you can't control her feelings, only yours. A man goes after what he wants!

"I'd rather not risk it" - Brother, if you're not willing to risk it, then you have already failed! If the reference makes you laugh/smile then say it, it is not your job to entertain her! Entertain yourself and she can join in your fun/happiness if she wants to.


Peace...

Author:  Mattr1984 [ Sat May 18, 2013 1:48 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Had decent date, need some ideas on next move

Lol very true, honestly though I didn't feel like kissing her at the time. Maybe it was nerves though which is weak, I'll see, escalation is definitely a part of my game that needs work.

If I see her again it will be a different story. If not I got laid last night so who cares? Haha.

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