PUA Forum
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/

Need HELP ASAP
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=53&t=12015
Page 1 of 2

Author:  dp9103 [ Fri Nov 30, 2007 7:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Need HELP ASAP

Hey guys,
Well let me start of by saying im super new to this. I have read the MM book and Styles book. I haved serged it, im not a big bar person. So I decided to try opening sets in public. (i though if i master public then i can master bars.) So i was at the dog park and I saw a HB8 (Monday night). So I started talking to here and it was going great. We exchanged numbers. The next day (Tuesday) she texts me and asks if i want to walk our dogs together so i said yes, it when great we talked, we laught she gave me IOIs and at the end she told me that she want to do it again. on Thursday I called her and asked he out. Now today Friday Im picking her up and were going to dinner and then dancing.

The help i need it a kiss close. I am get at talking and starting convertions but Im a total pussy when it comes to kiss closing. Can you guys help me. And i dont want to ask her "do you want to kiss me"

So please help.

Author:  JSmooth [ Fri Nov 30, 2007 9:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Kiss Close

Glad you like the Mystery Method and Style. I do as well. So, I'll give you the advice I think Mystery and Style would or try to. To remember back on something he said in his book. The AFC makes too much out of kissing. And because he builds it up in his mind, he makes it a "big deal." The Venusian Artist knows this isn't a close. The only close is a F-close thus he doesn't put as much pressure on himself and the "Kiss Close" is easier.

With that in mind, you need to get out of the headspace that kissing is a big deal, or you'll make too much out of it during the course of the night. When you go out with her, I would assume you are at some point in the comfort stage or late in attraction stages. So you need to Kino escalate, start small, brushing against her, holding hands, touching on the small of her back, etc. Until you get to kissing. You need to be that touchy feely person so it's "no big deal"

Since you are going to dinner and dancing you should have all the opportunities you need to Kino escalate and kiss close. I know you can do it! Now get out there and win her over!

Author:  snubby (aka Zen) [ Fri Nov 30, 2007 9:28 pm ]
Post subject: 

I agree with everything jsmooth says. I'll add that in that kino escalation, you can put her hand on your arm. If she leaves it there, that's a good sign. If you've gotten other IOIs at this point, you can lean in and smell her hair, and say, "I'm trying so hard not to kiss you."

that's pure MM

Good luck.

Author:  JSmooth [ Fri Nov 30, 2007 9:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Mystery Kiss Gambit

Nice Zen! Of course my favorite Mystery Kiss Gambit. "You want to kiss me?" Yes or Maybe, kiss the girl. If she says No, "I didn't say you could just looked like you had something on your mind!"

Above all else relax and have fun! 8)

Author:  dp9103 [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 7:11 am ]
Post subject: 

Thanks guys for your help but im sorry to say im a fucken pussy who embrasses all you PUA. I neg'd her and she negs me back, I counted 24 IOI's the kino was great. I touched, i tought here how to swing dance, we held hands and she would grab my hand when i wans holding here, i played with her hair and she payed with mine. BTW tonite she looked like a HB 9 maybe a 9.5 for sure the hotest girl i ever went on a date with. but she was a little shy so i know she wouldnt have kissed me in public. So i waited until i drop her off. and then she goes in for a hug, i think she wanted to kiss me but i didnt kiss her but she kissed my cheat. I think i REALLY FUCKED UP. Im a fucken pussy. I know for a fact she likes me.

PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT TO DO.
do u think im in the freind zone?
should i call her? how long should a wait?

please help this pussy out.

Author:  snubby (aka Zen) [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 1:37 pm ]
Post subject: 

You need a plan. Instead of planning ahead, you seem to be reacting to the latest "disaster", and beating yourself up for perceived mistakes.

Take a deep breath and relax. This is not a disaster, it's an opportunity for you to learn and grow. She's obviously interested in you, but probably confused right now as to whether you want to be just friends or more.
Here are some thoughts:

1) don't come off as needy. You could call or email just to say hi, and hold off on setting up the next "date". If she brings up a date idea, go for it. I'd wait a few days before you bring it up. When you do, it should be more like, "I was planning on doing (whatever fun thing), why don't you come along?"

2) next time you're out together, build comfort again, get her to a secluded area of the venue you're at, kino escalate, look her in the eyes and say, "I'm trying so hard not to kiss you right now" and see what her reaction is. If she says, "good, because I never kiss in public," well, there you go. If she says, "who said you couldn't" go for it. If she says, "that's a coincidence, because I'm trying really hard not to rip your clothes off and fuck you", take her home.

3) stop thinking anyone on this forum is better than you, or that you're worthless, or other pointless bull shit. Even a Master PUA is always learning and improving.

4) I personally think any budding PUA would benefit from meditating. Daily meditation is one of the cornerstones of my Zen Method. It will help you relax and just be in the moment, and also help you let go of all your past "mistakes" and see them for what they really are, just learning opportunities. This frame of mind makes a huge difference in all areas of your life.

Good luck.

Author:  dp9103 [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 3:31 pm ]
Post subject: 

Thanks jsmooth37076 and snubby (aka Zen) for all you advice
and Zen thank for making me feel better. I couldnt fall asleep last night because i was thinking of what happened. im a nice, smart, fun and confident guy. but when it comes to kissing and sex im chicken out. I know it all in my mind. but i cant not help it. Zen i will take your advice and i hope, if i see her again that i wont chicken out again.

Author:  dp9103 [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 4:24 pm ]
Post subject:  what do you guys think

I though I really fucked up but at 11am today (Saturday) I got a text from her which reads “morning mate! Thank you very much for last night, it truly was fun times:) I’m sorry I had to go early. I have millions plans for today… Do you have time tom, maybe we could meet up go for a walk?”

so i guess i didnt fuck up too bad
what should i do from here
i havent responded to her yet

Author:  JSmooth [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 4:27 pm ]
Post subject: 

Here is something I would like for you to do before you go out on your next date. It's a David DeAngelo method to center yourself mentally. It really works. You'll have to read this first but here's the way it works.

Close your eyes for a moment. Breath in through your nose and out your mouth. As you do imagine blowing tension right out. Inhale calmness, relaxation, and peace. Exhale tension, anxiety, and anticipation.

I want you to detatch from your past. Image cutting a cord or something. All the things you've done, right or wrong. Just let it go, it doesn't exist. The cord is cut.

Now I want you to detach from your future. Let go of all your expectations, all the things you want to have happen, all the things you are commited to just let it go.

And now detach from the present. Detach from what you think you're here for, what you're trying to do, and you anxiety. Make your outcome unimportant. Just forget it, just relax, and be here for a moment.

Finally, release your identity from yourself. Just let go of your self image for a minute. Now notice how you feel. :)

When you do this it helps get you in a mental, and emotional state where you can think more clearly. I think you know what to do. I personally think that when you are out with this HB, your mind is running at 90 mph, and you think too much about every little thing. I've been there! This exercise with help calm you down. When you get use to it takes seconds to do. I do it in the field before approaching at times.

Author:  Slick_uk [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 6:16 pm ]
Post subject: 

the hug moment there was definitely the time to ask if she wants to kiss you. Or you could've disengaged with the hug, and tried some triangular gazing, I have 100% success with that lol but i've only done it twice!

You're doing great though don't worry, nearly there. Relax but remember the more you delay the more you'll get put in the LJBF box

Author:  snubby (aka Zen) [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 6:39 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
You're doing great though don't worry, nearly there. Relax but remember the more you delay the more you'll get put in the LJBF box
So true. It's time to make your move. And remember, a kiss and just be a simple kiss on the lips, it doesn't have to be tongue gymnastics. Start by getting back in the comfort zone. A kiss on the lips along with kino escalation is all part of comfort building. You can save the all out French kissing for when the two of you are someplace more private.

Good luck, relax and have fun.

Author:  Claire [ Sat Dec 01, 2007 6:53 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
So i waited until i drop her off. and then she goes in for a hug, i think she wanted to kiss me but i didnt kiss her but she kissed my cheat. I think i REALLY FUCKED UP. Im a fucken pussy. I know for a fact she likes me.

PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT TO DO.
do u think im in the freind zone?
should i call her? how long should a wait?

please help this pussy out.
LOL you guys kill me with laughter sometimes I agree with the guys here
you had that in the bag and got scared. Like Slik_uk said the longer you wait the your chance of LJBF increases.

Here's what you need to do---now this well take "Balls" not a "Pussy":)

So what Slik said with the Triangular gaze Do from the start next time you see her your house, her house or whatever.... when she's walking into the door. Give her the sexy eyes---not clueless amateur eyes-- then tell her there's something i got to do and BAM kiss

I think you can redeem yourself if you do it that way or you wait to the end of the night again and blow it yet again........

Author:  dp9103 [ Mon Dec 03, 2007 5:12 am ]
Post subject: 

HEY ALL thanks for all of your advise.
btw J SMOOTH your advise was great.

so this is what happened.
she texted me asking if i would go walk our dogs together and i said yes.
we walked and talked for about 1.5 hours and it was going great then i said "ok so i will see you later" and we went home (i when home and she went to her house)
about 45 mins later(6pm) she texted me saying she needs to talk to me and if i can come over. so i told her im out with freinds (not to seem needy and after i was done i would stop by) so around 9.45pm i stop over her house and she got in my car and we went around the corner. I parked and he talked for 2 hours in the car.
she told he she just broke up with her bf (last week) and she is not ready for a relationship. so bababababaaa..... sometime later i said "i have been trying so hard not to kiss for the past 3 days" and she said "why" i said "i didnt want to scare you away by moving to fast" she said "im not scared" so i went in for a kiss and it was one of the greatest kiss's every. we made out for about 30 mins and then i stop. i say " well i have to get you home now" she said "i dont want to go" i said "you have no say because im dropping you off" she said "i dont want to go home, can i come over" I said "nop, not everyone can sleep with me, you havent earned it yet". so we kissed good night and i went home.
As soon as i get home she texts me saying "i miss you, i cant get you out of my mind, i cant wait to see you again" i texted her "thanks, good night"

so what do you guys think...

Author:  JSmooth [ Mon Dec 03, 2007 12:38 pm ]
Post subject: 

Awesome man! On one hand you could have closed it and you know that. If you like this girl as much as I think you do, and want a long term relationship with her you so played your cards right. You finally kino escalated and obviously she was waiting for it (30 min makeout session). I like the fact that you told her to stop leaving her wanting more, that'll definately keep her interested. Pure "Cat String Theory".

Knew you could do it! :D

Author:  snubby (aka Zen) [ Mon Dec 03, 2007 12:44 pm ]
Post subject: 

And THAT, my friends, is how the game is played.

Well done. I'm impressed.

Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/