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Went in without an opener in mind...got laughed at.
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Author:  strimpboi [ Wed Feb 17, 2010 5:55 am ]
Post subject:  Went in without an opener in mind...got laughed at.
So, I was sitting in a coffee shop, and there was a cute girl sitting next to me. I like this particular place as my hiding spot from the world, so I don't normally talk to anyone here. But this girl was giving me signals hard. She kept looking over at me, playing with her hair, rubbing her neck, etc. So I figured I'd talk to her. So I finally look up and we eye contact. I say "hey", she says "sorry, what was that", so I just said "hi". She laughed, and said "hi" back. I couldn't think of how to play it. Instantly I thought negging her for laughing at me would make me look bad, so I just smiled and went back to reading my paper. Any tips on how I should have handled this?
Author:  super_m [ Wed Feb 17, 2010 7:03 am ]
Post subject: 
When I read how you describe it, it seems like a harmless friendly laugh, unless she was particularly brutal about it. The fact that she said "sorry" shows she was concerned about what you had to say, so when she realized you were just saying hi, it may have been more of an "aw that's cute" kind of reaction from her. Seems like you were being too harsh on yourself rather, which threw you off.

I'd probably ask her "whatcha doin/readin over there?" or some type of comfort building question. Since she was interested, she's probably waiting for an opportunity to talk, just waiting for you to ask anything.

I'm new to the community, but hope I was helpful in the least bit.

-Cheers
Author:  strimpboi [ Wed Feb 17, 2010 7:09 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
When I read how you describe it, it seems like a harmless friendly laugh, unless she was particularly brutal about it. The fact that she said "sorry" shows she was concerned about what you had to say, so when she realized you were just saying hi, it may have been more of an "aw that's cute" kind of reaction from her. Seems like you were being too harsh on yourself rather, which threw you off.

I'd probably ask her "whatcha doin/readin over there?" or some type of comfort building question. Since she was interested, she's probably waiting for an opportunity to talk, just waiting for you to ask anything.

I'm new to the community, but hope I was helpful in the least bit.

-Cheers
Huh, I hadn't thought about it like that. It was a little giggle, nothing brutal. Damn, I should have plowed forward. Oh well, leason learned.
Author:  Jayshine [ Fri Feb 19, 2010 1:27 am ]
Post subject: 
glad you approached even though u didnt have anything in mind...thats great bc you still fucking approached and thats all that matters!!!
Author:  Alsex [ Fri Feb 19, 2010 7:25 am ]
Post subject: 
I wouldn't take it as something bad that you made a mistake. I would pump my fucken fists in the air.

Not only did you lose 1 girl out of like the world population, but you learned something HUGE.

Really think about what you learned, when you discovered it, give yourself a pat on the back.
Author:  Impression [ Fri Feb 19, 2010 12:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
Maybe she was shy, and shocked, and a bit nervous, dont ever stop there, go for a secound question and see how she responds to that.
Author:  goodtimes09 [ Sat Feb 20, 2010 10:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sounds to me like she was probably dissappointed that you didn't try again.

I know some of the guys here are against routines but I think it doesn't hurt if you have no idea what to say at first.

I would not use them forever but as training wheels it may not be a bad idea.

Next time if you have nothing to open with at all, you could at lest try to notice what she's reading, make some guesses about her from it, and start off with that. Couldn't hurt. Especially if she's reading something like Harry Potter or w/e.
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