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| Girl at the office... https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=51&t=50033 |
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| Author: | frosticewind [ Sat Aug 08, 2009 1:04 am ] |
| Post subject: | Girl at the office... |
There's this girl at the office (different department though so a relationship can't get in the way) and she's real cute. She's never had a boyfriend before. so i try to make a move. I try to ask her out for coffee or lunch or whatever but she's always "busy" or "going to the gym". Yesterday, i asked her to come get coffee with me. she said sure since she'd be getting a cup later anyway. so later that day, i said "let's go" she said she already went with my friend to go grab one. now that just sucked. i busted her balls for it though (in a david deAngelo way) and pretended it was alright. I ignored her for the rest of the day. Later, that evening, she sent me a message asking some stupid question about HTML (about the tag being used for creating a new line... hell, everyone knows that)... anyway, i didn't respond. i went to sleep again. Any advice on how to handle her? UPDATE: It's been a week since all this, and she's still difficult. I've learned from her that she's got self-esteem issues since her father always criticizes her about her looks which makes her insecure.(She's an HB9.7, by the way). She feels awkward when i compliment her, but i really don't want to neg her any more since i know about her issues. I really do like her though. i just wish she'd stop pushing me away like she did to all the other guys who tried to get her. (she's never been with anyone.) |
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| Author: | NonStopReaper [ Sat Aug 08, 2009 8:08 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
well first of all gaming a girl at your work isnt the best idea (even if she in a diffrent department) but if you must i suggest keeping her in the loop. for all you know she might have that policy of not dating any guy from work. I know most of my female friends have that policy but it doesnt say they can not mess around with you. Just text her back and invite her to more event like " hey me and some of my friend are going to grab some food, i thought you might like to come along." if she feels insecure with her looks, i personally wouldnt complement her look unless she deserves it and earned it from me. instead complement her personality like" you know you give off a positive energy when you are around" or " i like your sense of leardership" ect ect. make stuff up if you have to. Just like kino make her use to your complements, then you can start complementing her looks once you get more IoI and comfort with her. |
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| Author: | Marc [ Sat Aug 08, 2009 9:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girl at the office... |
When the girl is in the office or in closed community she should be digging you big time, she should be the one stopping by your desk and suggesting coffee or work lunches But lets try to look at your situation. Quote: There's this girl at the office (different department though so a relationship can't get in the way)
Not true. Rumor spreads like wild fire and if things go down south then she would be talking.Quote: so i try to make a move. I try to ask her out for coffee or lunch or whatever but she's always "busy" or "going to the gym".
You communicated interest too soon. What kind of rapport do you have with herfor her to have coffee with you without thinking that you are interested. Ofcourse she is too BUSY for you.Quote: Yesterday, i asked her to come get coffee with me. she said sure since she'd be getting a cup later anyway. so later that day, i said "let's go" she said she already went with my friend to go grab one.
So far she is not digging you. She went with your friend because she knows that you would be back asking her again anyways, so who cares.Quote: I ignored her for the rest of the day.
I hope you didnt sub communicate that you were affected. So she sent you that message IMO to check whether you have ejected or still interested.Later, that evening, she sent me a message asking some stupid question about HTML (about the tag being used for creating a new line... hell, everyone knows that)... anyway, i didn't respond. i went to sleep again. Quote: It's been a week since all this, and she's still difficult. I've learned from her that she's got self-esteem issues since her father always criticizes her about her looks which makes her insecure.(She's an HB9.7, by the way). She feels awkward when i compliment her, but i really don't want to neg her any more since i know about her issues. I really do like her though. i just wish she'd stop pushing me away like she did to all the other guys who tried to get her. (she's never been with anyone.)
Ok so for this girl. She isnt comfortable with relations and dating (some girls have this in them). So I would say dont ask her for coffee or anything. Just give her a big ass smile and say hello and go on to doing your stuff. Kind of not giving her attention but at the same time being polite and everything. She should be wondering whether you are still into her or not. So talk to her very briefly and have something fun to say (may be not C&F) but fun that would make her laugh. And then walk away. After doing this a couple of times if you still dont ask her out it would get her wondering and in my experience they make subtle indications of just haing out in the common area or grabbing a quick coffee or lunch. Now you need to do more of push and less of pull now because you have already communicated interest even before she started digging you. You striked when the iron was not just yet ready. But nontheless, lesson learned. And please dont invite her out to hang out unless you ahve been on 2-3 coffee breaks or have had one-two work lunches. Remember when she is at work she should be the one digging you big time. |
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| Author: | Rockbar [ Mon Aug 10, 2009 12:02 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Use the elevator as a FTC. I once did at my work and got a date+number after moving 4 floors. You'll get social proof from all the jealous males in the elevator that look at her every day of the week and wank off on her at night. Also, I'd neg her about her issues but do it subtly. That's perfect, because h er father is probably a very important male person (the only one?) in her life and if she is linking those same fraternal characteristics to you she may become sort of submissive towards you, the way she is towards her father. |
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| Author: | bchtreffendy22 [ Mon Aug 10, 2009 12:04 am ] |
| Post subject: | girl at the office.. |
That girl seems to play hard-to-get.  Well if you really like her, you should make some research about her first so that you will know her hobbies or favorites for example playing badminton and then you kinda relate it to her like inviting her. If she says yes then It's you time to make your move. Just a tip, Girls really love guys who can make them laugh. They become so transparent. 
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| Author: | frosticewind [ Tue Aug 11, 2009 7:33 am ] |
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I see.. Thanks everyone. I don't get to see her though and i was wondering what you would suggest is a good way to get her attention. She works one floor below me and i don't really pass by her office. The only means of communication i have (short of going down to her cubicle) is through chat and sms. Is there anything i could do to get her closer (without asking her out)? |
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| Author: | Marc [ Tue Aug 11, 2009 7:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: I see.. Thanks everyone. I don't get to see her though and i was wondering what you would suggest is a good way to get her attention. She works one floor below me and i don't really pass by her office. The only means of communication i have (short of going down to her cubicle) is through chat and sms.
Chat is good if you mean the office IM. You could come in on a Monday morning and be like 'hey hows it going' and after her reply ask 'did you have as great of a weekend as I did, I had a blast !' this would intrigue her to ask you what did you do and after a good or a fake EXCITED story just say talk to you later. IM is good too. builds comfort.
Is there anything i could do to get her closer (without asking her out)? |
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| Author: | Rockbar [ Wed Aug 12, 2009 9:38 am ] |
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Don't forget to ask her name. If your company uses Windows messenger you can just look up her name and tell her something casual on IM, then move from there and tell her this IM thing isnt working and you'd rather go out and have lunch with her. Its usually Firstname.lastname at companyname dot com. So if you work at microsoft and she told you her name is jennifer jones it would be jennifer.jones at microsoft dot com or w/e |
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| Author: | Bronco [ Thu Aug 13, 2009 4:40 am ] |
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Just be that friendly, easy to get along with guy at work who is cool but handles his shit. She'll come to you just relax. The guys put some good advice in here. I'm sub'd |
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