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Where did I go wrong?
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Author:  Puaanus [ Mon Jun 08, 2015 9:59 am ]
Post subject:  Where did I go wrong?
Hi guys, below is an account of my first ever approach which I did yesterday. It would be cool if I could get some feedback.

It was a sunny Sunday in London. I was dressed good and smelled good. It was in a busy park. Me and the girl were both roughly 20 years old.

She was walking along alone so I approached from behind, putting my hand on her shoulder. Though I had a small spike in adrenaline, my body language and general demeanour were still portraying confidence. We kept walking as she took her headphones off and had a big smile. I asked her name, she responded and asked mine, all the while still smiling.

I asked what she was up to right at that moment. She said she wasn't doing anything, so I asked if she wanted to hang out. She laughed and said no.

She sad she was going to go home and tidy her house. She laughed when I made an incredulous face.

She asked where I'm from, I told her and said that she had a bit of an accent. She told me which country she's from and laughed when I joked it was typical of those girls to clean the house instead of have fun.

I asked again that she hang out with me. Again no. I asked for her number, she said no.

As I walked away I complemented her ass, she laughed and said thanks.

I'm presuming that if I had talked to her a bit more before asking to hang out or for a number she would have been more susceptible. What do you think?
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Mon Jun 08, 2015 1:24 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Where did I go wrong?
I think you startled her and prob came off a little creepy.

Try not to approach from behind.

You know who else sneaks up on people from behind? Rapists. LOL - that's an extreme example, but c'mon. The goal is not to scare her or surprise her. It's to come off as a good guy who is genuinely interested.

It may have been downhill from there - but it sorta sounds like maybe she simply wasn't attracted to you to begin with. It also sounds like you asked her to do something (hang out) WAY too early in the interaction. She didn't know anything about you, except you approach strangers from behind to chat about hanging out.

I'm not trying to come off negatively. Good for you for trying!

Now take what you learned and don't do it again. Improve next time.
Author:  Black Phantom [ Mon Jun 08, 2015 6:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Where did I go wrong?
Quote:
I'm presuming that if I had talked to her a bit more before asking to hang out or for a number she would have been more susceptible. What do you think?
That's exactly what happened. It was too soon. But also, you don't ask her to hang out, you TELL
her to hang out with you.

You might want to take this model:

1. START a conversation
2. HAVE a conversation
3. Be PLAYFUL and create some Attraction
4. Ask for NUMBER or invite to HANG-OUT

If you try to go too soon to ask for number, without building some connection through a conversation
and teasing through playfulness, then what you experienced will happen over and over again.

You could have talked more about her, asking her, "So what else do you do besides walking on Sundays...?"

Ask her about school, work and make her feel comfortable with you.

Then tease her - you did it already with that comment of how girls like that do clean on sundays. But even
more of that.

AND THEN tell her this, "Ok, well I gotta go. It was really nice meeting you. We should hang out sometimes,
here - put your number in my phone and I'll call you when I need a house-clean " and then give her the
phone and smile.

Make sense?

Lead the entire thing, from approach to a number, so it seems like a natural thing to do.

But good job with approaching in the first place. You say that was your first approach? That is awesome
work.

Guys, this guy might go places :)

Keep it up, good luck!
Author:  H4ck3rLarry [ Mon Jun 15, 2015 5:11 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Where did I go wrong?
Approaching from behind is wrong. Women are afraid when someone approaches them from behind and we (men) feel more tense when someone approaches us from the front.

In my opinion, a solid number close is a 40 min conversation. So pay attention to the amount of time you talked. Somewhere late in the conversation you could ask her some interview questions and talk mostly about her (that choice is not available at the beginning of the conversation, because most women unless they are attracted to you or looking for a boyfriend, dont want to strangers digging through their personal details experiences).

Anxiety among women is 4 times more common than in men. That is what pu artists dont know. She will simply flake if the conversation is too short or she knows little about you or you know little about her or/and you built little attraction/comfort value.

Attract first, it should take like 5 mins of the conversation. Talk about yourself a bit, have interesting/funny stories or facts about yourself that raise your value. Then the last part ask her questions (in assumption format or direct questions depending on how long you have talked and how much she likes you)..once you feel the engagement on her part is quite high ask for a phone number.
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