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2nd cold approach... making progress?
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Author:  Blues Guy [ Wed Oct 10, 2012 10:29 pm ]
Post subject:  2nd cold approach... making progress?
Wanted feedback.

Here's how it went.

At goodwill, HB8 (became HB7 when she started talking, but whatever) is looking at cups. I just decided to do something funny. So, I got an iron, brought it over to her and this is what happened:

Me: "Um, excuse me, did you lose an iron?"
Her: (laughs) "Oh no, that's not my iron."
Me: (stumbling) "I'm not gonna lie, I know this isn't your iron, I just felt like coming to talk to you."
Her (laughs again) "Oh well what's your name?"
Me: "_____"
Her: "Oh well I have a friend named ______ who's a comedian and would have loved your approach."
Me: "So what's your deal, are you the creative type?"
Her: "blah blah, yes,"
Me: "Yeah you seem like it... live around here, etc?"
Her: (goes on about yeah there's some bargain places here, I know where all the frozen yogurt places are, etc)
Me: "Well, you're really cool, we should do this again." (get out my phone)
Her: "Yeah you're more than welcome to give me your contact info, I'm not the type to give out my number" (if this was a shit test I failed)

At that point, I gave her my number, like an idiot. She asked my full name, etc... I dunno. I don't expect her to call, nor do I care, I did this approach mainly to get more comfortable with it. I guess the one strength I've always had is not getting one-itis very easily, if ever.

Let me know what you guys think.

And I lost so much focus that I walked to the checkout with an iron in my hand and ended up having to pay for it without looking like an idiot. Now I have an extra iron.
Author:  Sluggler [ Wed Oct 10, 2012 11:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd cold approach... making progress?
Quote:
Wanted feedback.

Here's how it went.

At goodwill, HB8 (became HB7 when she started talking, but whatever) is looking at cups. I just decided to do something funny. So, I got an iron, brought it over to her and this is what happened:

Me: "Um, excuse me, did you lose an iron?"
Her: (laughs) "Oh no, that's not my iron."
Me: (stumbling) "I'm not gonna lie, I know this isn't your iron, I just felt like coming to talk to you."
Her (laughs again) "Oh well what's your name?"
Me: "_____"
Her: "Oh well I have a friend named ______ who's a comedian and would have loved your approach."
Me: "So what's your deal, are you the creative type?"
Her: "blah blah, yes,"
Me: "Yeah you seem like it... live around here, etc?"
Her: (goes on about yeah there's some bargain places here, I know where all the frozen yogurt places are, etc)
Me: "Well, you're really cool, we should do this again." (get out my phone)
Her: "Yeah you're more than welcome to give me your contact info, I'm not the type to give out my number" (if this was a shit test I failed)

At that point, I gave her my number, like an idiot. She asked my full name, etc... I dunno. I don't expect her to call, nor do I care, I did this approach mainly to get more comfortable with it. I guess the one strength I've always had is not getting one-itis very easily, if ever.

Let me know what you guys think.

And I lost so much focus that I walked to the checkout with an iron in my hand and ended up having to pay for it without looking like an idiot. Now I have an extra iron.


LMFAO!!! Hahahah! Yoooooo i literally just fucking laughed out loud in front of my computer when reading this! #1 your approach was funny #2(The extremely funny part) You BOUGHT the iron! Why did you buy it man? You were to much in your head you could have just went and put the iron back down. haha. If she seen you again you could have just made a joke about.."Yeah, the iron is finished doing its job now." "Talk to ya soon". Or something...That had me rolling though man..Good one...Mind sending that iron to me? I'm a broke college student and could use it. HA!

Now to your game.

It sounds like you had a solid approach. She definitely wont forget you. Your approach was unique. It sounded like she was definitely interested in you.

The reason she didn't give you her number is because there wasnt enough comfort built...In other words she didnt feel comfortable enough to give you her number. Sometimes you will meet women who have had bad expeirences with giving their numbers out due to creeps and shit. But you want to make sure you build comfort(not to much, then chances are you'll get friend zoned).

In this situation you knew more about her than she knew about you. Which isnt the way you want it to be when you first meet a girl and you want to get her number or even hook up with her. In this interaction the only thing she knew about you was your name.

I Day game A LOT if you check most of my posts you'll see that. So what works best with building comfort is asking and connecting..Dont just ask and listen..CONNECT.

For example

You: "Cool, So you stay around here?"

Her: "Yeah i stay up on blah blah blah"

You: "Cool yeah i've been in the area for some time now. Its a nice area. Some evenings after work i like to go out to such and such place. They have delicious blank..What spots do you normally go to?

Her: I go to blah blah bla"

Here you can connect again about your experience at these places, and then you can change the topic to work..

You: "You seem like you are in a medical field..Am i right?

If she says no, and tell you her field of work. Then you can say something funny like "Omg i was going to guess that! But for some reason the first thing that came to mind was medical..You seem like you are a genuine person and really care for others...Especially your family".


See what i mean? This is how a conversation i have may go during day game.

Or if i notice something about her i like particularly, usually fashion, ill point it out how its unique and she must be a model, or have a job in the fashion industry. Blah blah..

Anyway, the point is you have to build comfort before asking for a number. Every now and then youll have a girl that is automatically attracted to you, for one reason or another, and she is already willing to give you her number...Duh, because she likes you and thinks you hot. If its just a random cold approach, chances are you will need to build comfort.

Good luck.

Sluggler
Author:  Sluggler [ Wed Oct 10, 2012 11:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
Also Approach, approach approach. Get rejected, keep approaching. Its amazing the results youll get. You start to meet and hook up with so many women till you totally come from a mentality of abundance.
Author:  DaveUrkel (BlackWhitePU) [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 12:11 am ]
Post subject: 
I love that style of going direct, by the way. I do it all the time. "Hey do you know where XYZ is?" (We're standing right in front of XYZ) "I'm totally messing with you, I just wanted an excuse to come over here and hit on you obnoxiously in the middle of this mall/bookstore etc."
Credit Sinn for that style of direct.

Anyway, you're approach was damn good if its only your 2nd approach ever.
HOWEVER, here's what you did wrong. You didn't reward her when you qualified her.
When you asked "So whats you deal, are you the creative type?" you didn't reward her.
Instead of just asking her another question right after she answered (questions back to back are usually no good) you should have said something like "That's awesome. I love creative people. I just get along better with them. I mean, I just feel like everybody should have a creative side, but a lot people don't. What kind of creative stuff do you do?"
When a girl answers a qualifying question like that, you HAVE to reward her for it and then just dig slightly deeper.

YOU HAVE TO HAVE AT THE VERY VERY VERY LEAST, JUST ONE REASON THAT YOU LIKE HER OTHER THAN HER LOOKS BEFORE YOU GET HER NUMBER.

This is most likely the reason she didn't give you her number. You only thought she was cute and didn't actually find out any reasons that she's a cool person other than her looks, which shows that you don't have too many standards.

Hopefully that helps.

But honestly man, you're doing awesome for only having done 2 approaches. Keep it up!
Author:  BombshellBrunette [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 2:43 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd cold approach... making progress?
Quote:
So, I got an iron, brought it over to her and this is what happened
Bringing an iron to game? Don't you think it's a bit bizarre and weird? Reminds me of the time when some guy approached me with a dildo at the bar and asked me if it was mine.
Author:  Don Horneone [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 6:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd cold approach... making progress?
Quote:
Bringing an iron to game? Don't you think it's a bit bizarre and weird? Reminds me of the time when some guy approached me with a dildo at the bar and asked me if it was mine.
Instead of complaining you should just politely say "thank you for bringing me back my dildo, I can't seem to keep track of its movements", then you've got yourself a free dildo!
Author:  Blues Guy [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 8:57 am ]
Post subject:  Re: 2nd cold approach... making progress?
Quote:
Quote:
So, I got an iron, brought it over to her and this is what happened
Bringing an iron to game? Don't you think it's a bit bizarre and weird? Reminds me of the time when some guy approached me with a dildo at the bar and asked me if it was mine.
Yes, that would be bizarre. Here's an idea though... read my whole post. For some reason you were the only person in this thread who didn't realize I pulled the iron off the shelf in Goodwill. Maybe I need to "girl proof" my messages... :)

That being said, thank you guys (and I emphasize the word GUYS) SO MUCH for your insight. I took it all into account and I feel great. I'm totally cool about not getting the girl's number, I think she was interested to a degree and I just went too quickly for the number without establishing comfort or rewarding her for being an actress.

This shit really helps to post it here and realize I did a good approach. I'm definitely doing it tomorrow and if anything noteworthy happens I'll be sure to post!
Author:  puaninja [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 12:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
Too quick on the number close. I'd say the only reason you should rush a number close is if you have genuine time constraints and she's about to leave. Because even after getting her number you should keep talking to her for a minute.

Also, asking if a product the store sells is hers is a little corny. But I appreciate your balls for making that your opening.
Author:  Hazze [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 9:26 pm ]
Post subject: 
not half bad. however you seem like you asked a lot of questions, 'where do you live etc.'
never ask questions. ever. unless of course, it's an assumptive question
Author:  Blues Guy [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 10:20 pm ]
Post subject: 
@puaninja That's great advice. It may have been a little corny, and I'm definitely not a corny guy, maybe try to get something that fits my style more. I'll keep at it.

@hazze - So true. Honestly man I felt my heart pounding, which is weird, I'm very social. I'm a good looking guy, a touring musician, I dress decently, and I've been with a LOT of women... but this cold approach shit is just a whole different animal.

Going to try again at World Market today.
Author:  StarRacer [ Thu Oct 11, 2012 11:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
That is really good. She was interested from the start. Just keeping approaching girls. You will get numbers. What I have learned is the longer the conversation the better. Because they will see you not as a stranger, but a person they are interested in getting to know.
Author:  puaninja [ Fri Oct 12, 2012 5:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Don't feel bad about impromptu openers. I was at an art gallery the other day and the best I could come up with was to start telling the girl "my motivation" behind the painting she was looking at. I was acting as if I was the artist, but in an obviously playful manner so she knew I wasn't actually the artist. She kind of half-way laughed and said "That's about the fourth time I've heard that tonight..." then walked away.

It was an AFC move, but at least I opened her.
Author:  Blues Guy [ Fri Oct 12, 2012 5:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
That's a really good opener. That's something that would fit my personality perfectly, that's really shitty that she already heard it. Fuck those other guys. Haha
Author:  puaninja [ Fri Oct 12, 2012 6:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
That's a really good opener. That's something that would fit my personality perfectly, that's really shitty that she already heard it. Fuck those other guys. Haha
Me and my wing werent' sure what exactly she meant tho. Because it's likely that she was actually talking to the original artists about their work, which is common there. But I didn't know if she was being literal, or making reference to being hit on. She looked like a HB6 fixed up to be a HB7, so I didn't feel like she was worth the extra effort of clarifying what exactly she meant, lol. Plus she kind of ejected, and I wasn't chasing.
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