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"Why did you approach us?"
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Author:  fook [ Mon Jul 02, 2012 8:05 am ]
Post subject:  "Why did you approach us?"
Sometimes when I enter a venue and there's a set right in front of me, I can just jump straight in. But most of the time that's not the case.

When a set is not right in front of you and there's a bunch of people spanning the distance between you two, how do you justify (implicitly or explicitly) approaching the set?

The point of things like opinion openers is so that they don't think you're hitting on them. But "just happening" to stop and think of this question while walking past the set is about as subtle as a flying brick.

This isn't theoretical. I've gotten reactions like, "Why did you ask us?" "Are you asking everyone else?" And of course any guys in the set never warm up to me because they know what's up.
Author:  On A Rampage [ Mon Jul 02, 2012 9:14 am ]
Post subject:  Re: "Why did you approach us?"
Quote:

This isn't theoretical. I've gotten reactions like, "Why did you ask us?" "Are you asking everyone else?" And of course any guys in the set never warm up to me because they know what's up.

LOOOOOOL

This is how it is where I'm from. I find just saying "hey" to a girl has been way more successful.
Author:  fook [ Mon Jul 02, 2012 9:24 am ]
Post subject: 
Thing is, that opener may be working better for you and not for me because you're more physically attractive (even if just due to my race and height)
Author:  On A Rampage [ Mon Jul 02, 2012 9:37 am ]
Post subject: 
Maybe but height shouldn't be a huge factor and most certainly not your race, unless the girl is a total bitch.

Have you tried just saying 'hey'? If they say 'hey' back thats an immediate ioi.
But what works for me may not work for you. By the sounds of it opening sets dosen't work for you either(Has never worked for me) so you may need to try a different approach.

If you find opening girls who are by themselves try that. I have had success with this. Maybe try opening girls who are already at the bar while you are both standing in line? Easy way to open by just saying 'hi' there no matter who you are. You don't have to #close, f-close-k-close every single girl. It dosen't hurt to be friends with chicks sometimes. And all that involves is being friendly with a girl. Sometimes you may have to walk before u can run.:)
Author:  Energetica [ Mon Jul 02, 2012 9:47 am ]
Post subject:  Re: "Why did you approach us?"
Quote:
Sometimes when I enter a venue and there's a set right in front of me, I can just jump straight in. But most of the time that's not the case.

When a set is not right in front of you and there's a bunch of people spanning the distance between you two, how do you justify (implicitly or explicitly) approaching the set?

The point of things like opinion openers is so that they don't think you're hitting on them. But "just happening" to stop and think of this question while walking past the set is about as subtle as a flying brick.

This isn't theoretical. I've gotten reactions like, "Why did you ask us?" "Are you asking everyone else?" And of course any guys in the set never warm up to me because they know what's up.
I usually open the guys. Much less likely to get rejected.

- Well of course it depends in which way you open them . They might think your gay , you're weird or just trying to get to their girls.

But if done correctly you will be able to create the 'buddy-buddy" vibe and then they usually start warming up to you.

Use the guys to get introduced to the girls.

Try it. Open a few guys.
Author:  Melodical [ Mon Jul 02, 2012 5:32 pm ]
Post subject: 
I've used the opinion opener a lot over the last ten years probably over a thousand times give or take. The girls unconsciously know what your doing but consciously they're on autopilot. I originally started using it as a way of having plausable deniability to protect myself from rejection but once I was comfortable in myself it became more of a screening process to weed out the numpties.

In answer to the question "why did you approach us?" simply reply "Because you're friendly intelligent girls" It's a basic language pattern where you piggyback a trait you want the girls to exhibit "friendly" to a one you know they would like to be perceived as "intelligent" after the statement just keep talking, it's a technique called "barreling through" that Tyler teaches, basically the girls step into your reality as being the dominant frame.

Bizzarely my most successful opinion opener has been "does this shirt go with these trousers?" and I've even had girls pull in HB's from neighbouring sets to join in the conversation.
Author:  zlibby76 [ Mon Jul 02, 2012 7:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
Saturday nite I took out a group of students to SHOW them how to open EVERY set and to make it easy for re-entry.

My group was already in the bar, so I entered solo, walked down the main part of the bar REALLY slow, with a smile, CHEERsING everyone that made eye contact with me and clicked drinks.

In about 10 mins. our group was THE GROUP to be around. B/c... once I had my guys do the same, EVERY set was open.

Here's what we did: We would approach EVERYONE, yell "HEYYYYYY!", click drinks, take a drink and ask, "what are you guys celebrating tonight?"

Once every table/set was open we posted up and in a short time, had the WHOLE BAR raising their glasses, screaming "HEYYYY!!!" and watching everyone take a drink b/c we approached every table and did the same thing with them on the initial approach. We OWNED that bitch!

So APPROACH EVERYBODY and ask, "what brings you guys out?" or "what are you celebrating tonight?"

By time you get to the set you WANT, you've already estbalished yourself as a "somebody."
Author:  TheKoon [ Tue Jul 03, 2012 6:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
I like this. This really makes you stand out and be the alpha male. Once you got everybody's attention you can go approach who you want. good post.
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