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Asked a girl on okcupid for her number....
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Author:  Ability [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 5:45 am ]
Post subject:  Asked a girl on okcupid for her number....
Had a long conversation with a girl on okcupid and tried to number close, but she didn't reply back. Any tips on how to precede?
Author:  Ability [ Thu Jun 02, 2011 11:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
I was thinking of saying something like "It's ok that you're shy. I won't hold it against you." Then either starting up a new subject or just throwing out my number. Any thoughts?
Author:  PSyKaD4LiC [ Fri Jun 03, 2011 2:05 am ]
Post subject: 
just start a new subject and try to build rapport with her and try to get her number later. don't ask again too soon or risk being labeled creepy or annoying. OR, if you want to stop putting forth effort just ask for it again and cross your fingers. then she'll say yes and give you her number or say no, and label you as creepy and/or annoying, but at least you didn't waste any more efforts on her. you never know. it depends on how much you actually enjoy talking to her. build rapport. any time you ask for a girl's number there's always a risk she wont want you having it but at least you can't say you didn't try. "make the ho say no". in the meantime be hitting up other chicks.

use PUA techniques. say funny/clever things that will make her remember you. DON'T just ask the "where do u go to school" "what's your major" "whats your favorite color" type questions because they're boring and girls probably wont give a fuck. she wont remember you for those types of questions. DON'T CALL HER PRETTY OR BEAUTIFUL. Too generic. Instead say something like "you have a really interesting face i really like the curves". whatever. She will be more likely to remember you then. My favorite thing is to make up a fake story between you and her. for example i've been texting 2 girls now that i met on okcupid both with different funny made up stories. the first one is a CIA agent and I am a terrorist and together we are conspiring to take over the world. the second one is my ex lover and we had an incredibly passionate past but it just didn't work out all those years ago and now we are reminiscing about the past. both made up BS stories, but both are funny and entertaining. truth be told it is hard keeping girls attention that you meet on the internet. because it's fucking cyberspace. but it can still work. meeting girls in field is much more effective for keeping their attention as long as you have good body language, make good eye contact, and aren't a total pussy, the girl will be interested. so if you're gonna make part of your game on okcupid, send a shitton of opener messages out to a wide variety of bitches and whichever ones take the bait, have fun with it!

if your girl decides to stop chatting or making the conversations difficult then forget about her. it's her loss.
Author:  Sektor [ Fri Jun 03, 2011 7:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
Very insightful response, Psyk! I was logging on to ask about something similar, and your post hit the nail right on the head. Thanks!
Author:  eripmav [ Sat Jun 04, 2011 6:57 am ]
Post subject: 
You need to go back to Comfort and game again from there. :wink:
Author:  Faust23 [ Mon Jun 13, 2011 2:48 am ]
Post subject: 
Your doing it wrong.
Online is all about seeing her as fast as possible.
Texting email messaging is all bad you want the number as fast as possible then set up date asap.

I send a message to a girl that ask for their number and I get it 90% of the time. From then a quick opener text some cocky funny and set up the date.

If you spend extra time they will flake or worse yet build up a better version of you that you wont live up too.

PS. how do you get comfort for some stranger on the internet. Untill you meet her your just some guy on the internet once you see her in person you become legit.
Author:  Jer585 [ Mon Jun 13, 2011 3:50 am ]
Post subject: 
If you were talking via message not IM on okcupid then send her a wink with something to get her to talk more... I wouldn't send another message because she may find it annoying that when she stopped responding you just sent another message
Author:  PSyKaD4LiC [ Sat Jul 23, 2011 10:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Very insightful response, Psyk! I was logging on to ask about something similar, and your post hit the nail right on the head. Thanks!
You are welcome, kind sir.
Quote:
Your doing it wrong.
Online is all about seeing her as fast as possible.
Texting email messaging is all bad you want the number as fast as possible then set up date asap.

I send a message to a girl that ask for their number and I get it 90% of the time. From then a quick opener text some cocky funny and set up the date.

If you spend extra time they will flake or worse yet build up a better version of you that you wont live up too.

PS. how do you get comfort for some stranger on the internet. Untill you meet her your just some guy on the internet once you see her in person you become legit.
I think you are right. I've been having trouble setting up dates to meet in person with girls that I have met on the Internet. My approach is that I try to build up rapport with the girls by texting/messaging and then meet them up, and I've noticed that an alarming amount of the girls I've been texting I will never end up meeting up with. I just figured it was because it was the fucking Internet, but perhaps I am wasting too much precious time. To be honest, after a while of building rapport, I start to fear the girl will reject me, so my mental game starts to go, and that's when I start to doubt the things I say and therefore fail. Often times I just start to lose interest too. If they are texting me back at all it clearly means they are interested. So yeah. I think I will take your suggestion and escalate to a date much sooner for the next few people i am talking to and see how it works out
Author:  darkstar1731 [ Sun Jul 24, 2011 6:35 pm ]
Post subject: 
After a few messages back and forth, I just said "give me your number and I'll text you sometime". She did, maybe try that.
Author:  Keno512 [ Sun Jul 24, 2011 7:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
I've found it to be true as well, that you NEED to get a number and set-up a meet as fast as possible. I've found that getting the number and sending texts and emails back and forth just kills things. After all, they have even LESS invested in someone online than someone they have already met in person.

I mean, it's like window shopping anyway. If you don't like this display, then simply hang a left and peer into the next. I might do a follow-up or two, if they really seem to be interesting, but if they don't respond, I would say their loss. Move on to the next window.

Good luck brothah....
Author:  ItsAlwaysOn [ Sun Jul 24, 2011 7:33 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I was thinking of saying something like "It's ok that you're shy. I won't hold it against you." Then either starting up a new subject or just throwing out my number. Any thoughts?

god no. just move on. you've done your job. have a good conversation for a few messages, then go for the number. if she doesn't respond, that's not your fault. sending her more messages after that point is just a gigantic waste of time. i mean, there's Plenty Of Fish in the sea. (see what i did there?)

if you've done this enough, you'll realize that girls online will sometimes just randomly stop talking to you. even after you've had a conversation thats been pretty fun and interesting. usually they dont withhold their number after a good conversation, but it does happen occasionally.

there could be tons of reasons why, some of which dont even pertain to you. maybe she recently started seeing her exbf again. maybe she met another guy from the site and is focused on him. maybe she just decided she didnt want to try online dating. maybe she just hasnt been on the computer for the last couple of days (btw, do you know if she even got your message yet? obviously theres a huge difference between it being deleted vs it being unread).

so, dont sweat it. start messaging some other girls on the site. heck, message ones that you arent even all that attracted to. work on different types of openers and conversations just to get practice. your results will improve because of it.
Author:  ItsAlwaysOn [ Sun Jul 24, 2011 7:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
After a few messages back and forth, I just said "give me your number and I'll text you sometime". She did, maybe try that.

yeah, this is pretty standard i think. sometimes ill seed it a little with something like "i think im gonna be pretty bored at work tomorrow so give me your number and ill send you a text if i have the time"
Author:  Teknine [ Mon Jul 25, 2011 6:36 pm ]
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Don't send another message after asking for her number. As said already, you've done your part.

I usually just suggest we meet and ask for her number then, couching it in a logistical framework.
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