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MY OKCupid Status: Replies Selectively?
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Author:  anonymousdt [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 2:21 am ]
Post subject:  MY OKCupid Status: Replies Selectively?
Okay, so we all know that when we see a HB8-10 on that site that she almost certainly has the red "Replies Selectively" status. This is because she gets tons of messages by lots of chumps and never replies. Also, those women get hit on a lot in real life, lessening the need or desire to resort to online dating. And when we see that status it demonstrates her high value and pre-selection. Simple enough.

This question has to do with a man's status. I made a couple of fake accounts, sent myself messages and didn't respond, thus giving me the "Replies Selectively" status. My first thought was to reap the same benefits from women who have that status: to demonstrate high-value, non-neediness, and pre-selection (since they see it as women are messaging me and I am picky and don't often reply). BUT, the dynamic is very different on an online dating site when it comes to who messages who. The men message woman way more often than women message men. Men hit on woman way more than woman hit on men in real life too, but there's something more formal and noticeable about messaging online. There's no two ways about it, a message is a come-on (unlike in real life where you can couch a pick up as something else, like to ask a question or get an opinion). So, my concern is that a woman might see that status and be more hesitant to message for fear of rejection.

So I guess my question boils down to this. What is more desirable? The green, approachable "replies often" status or the red, mysterious "replies selectively status." Even the colors have a lot to do with it. Green means "go, do it, message this guy." Red means "stop, be afraid, don't message this guy."

On the other hand, who cares if I get messaged. Most of my game is from me messaging others. They then look at my profile and see pre-selection and high value from the "replies selectively" status.

Anyways, opinions? thought?
Author:  jurupa [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 6:16 am ]
Post subject:  Re: MY OKCupid Status: Replies Selectively?
You are seriously over thinking this. Most girls don't send out any messages out to guys on dating sites, so you are making this "reply" status thing a bigger issue than it is. Saying that do you think girls that do send out messages are going to be deterred from such a "reply" status? I highly doubt it. Also hotter the girl the less guys hit on her and the more they check her out from a distance generally speaking in the real world. Online they tend to get blasted with e-mails from guys most with no game at all.
Author:  anonymousdt [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 6:46 am ]
Post subject: 
I overthink everything. I just like focusing on the little details. Just how I do it.

I was also thinking about whether to accept awards from people. Specifically, should I accept "Friends in Real Life" or whatever? The awards seem kinda cheesy.
Author:  maria_ [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 11:59 am ]
Post subject: 
If you are the one that initiates things then having any kind of status will not make a difference.
If a girl wants to do the first move and she must truly like you she will like you from the rest of your profile. Not just your status.
When you get lots of messages you don't even notice what the guy says. You go straight to the profile photo. You see from the ones that have messaged you who are the best ones and you read their message. After you finished with that and if you are bored you have a laugh with the rest that are begging. If anyone of them makes you angry or is funny you might think of replying, IF your attention is not already pulled by the good looking ones. ( if any of them has a game).
On the other hand for a girl being extremely pretty and doing the first move you must be either very good looking, a celebrity or a guy that has the rock star style.
Author:  AFC_confused [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 12:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
Is being a social, talkative, friendly guy a DHV? I don't think so.
Author:  Mig [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 6:33 pm ]
Post subject: 
I have replies selectively and I get a lot of messages still. In fact...girls even write "You seem like a bit of a ****, but you also seem fun; so I thought I'd message you even if you probably won't write back." I get that message pretty often actually.

Then it's easy. I have 5 dates this weekend with girls from POF/OKcupid, and a couple this week. I had to blow off an HB7 tonight for an HB8 with some real hot tattoos...(I like the wild girls).
Author:  daquix [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 10:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I have replies selectively and I get a lot of messages still. In fact...girls even write "You seem like a bit of a ****, but you also seem fun; so I thought I'd message you even if you probably won't write back." I get that message pretty often actually.

Then it's easy. I have 5 dates this weekend with girls from POF/OKcupid, and a couple this week. I had to blow off an HB7 tonight for an HB8 with some real hot tattoos...(I like the wild girls).
What do you have in your profile that makes you seem like an ass?
Author:  daquix [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 10:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
If you are the one that initiates things then having any kind of status will not make a difference.
If a girl wants to do the first move and she must truly like you she will like you from the rest of your profile. Not just your status.
When you get lots of messages you don't even notice what the guy says. You go straight to the profile photo. You see from the ones that have messaged you who are the best ones and you read their message. After you finished with that and if you are bored you have a laugh with the rest that are begging. If anyone of them makes you angry or is funny you might think of replying, IF your attention is not already pulled by the good looking ones. ( if any of them has a game).
On the other hand for a girl being extremely pretty and doing the first move you must be either very good looking, a celebrity or a guy that has the rock star style.
That's not true at all. I've seen some ugly dudes get walked up to from some beautiful 9's. Were you made fun of as a child?
Author:  maria_ [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 11:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
If you are the one that initiates things then having any kind of status will not make a difference.
If a girl wants to do the first move and she must truly like you she will like you from the rest of your profile. Not just your status.
When you get lots of messages you don't even notice what the guy says. You go straight to the profile photo. You see from the ones that have messaged you who are the best ones and you read their message. After you finished with that and if you are bored you have a laugh with the rest that are begging. If anyone of them makes you angry or is funny you might think of replying, IF your attention is not already pulled by the good looking ones. ( if any of them has a game).
On the other hand for a girl being extremely pretty and doing the first move you must be either very good looking, a celebrity or a guy that has the rock star style.
That's not true at all. I've seen some ugly dudes get walked up to from some beautiful 9's. Were you made fun of as a child?
Oh really? Well the fact that this is my attitude with guys it makes it true. And the fact that other girls I know do the same then it is also true. There are always exceptions of course. Some ppl have fetishes or are kinky in a way.

On the other hand, you seem to have been annoyed too much.I am sure that you were made fun of as a child. If not as a child then as a man.
Author:  Mig [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 11:11 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
What do you have in your profile that makes you seem like an ass?
It's probably because of this...

"I'll start with who you are...and weed out some: You're Unique , Responsible when needed, Stylish when you want to be, Dorky in your own way, able to be Spontaneous or well Prepared , In Shape (think you can keep up with me?), Fun to be around and yet Down to Earth ."
Author:  daquix [ Sun Sep 26, 2010 12:02 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:

It's probably because of this...

"I'll start with who you are...and weed out some: You're Unique , Responsible when needed, Stylish when you want to be, Dorky in your own way, able to be Spontaneous or well Prepared , In Shape (think you can keep up with me?), Fun to be around and yet Down to Earth ."
Very nice.
Author:  daquix [ Sun Sep 26, 2010 12:03 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Oh really? Well the fact that this is my attitude with guys it makes it true. And the fact that other girls I know do the same then it is also true. There are always exceptions of course. Some ppl have fetishes or are kinky in a way.

On the other hand, you seem to have been annoyed too much.I am sure that you were made fun of as a child. If not as a child then as a man.
I'm not annoyed, I'm just concerned.

Concerned about your lack of knowledge of woman ... being that you are a woman. (I think)
Author:  maria_ [ Sun Sep 26, 2010 10:02 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Oh really? Well the fact that this is my attitude with guys it makes it true. And the fact that other girls I know do the same then it is also true. There are always exceptions of course. Some ppl have fetishes or are kinky in a way.

On the other hand, you seem to have been annoyed too much.I am sure that you were made fun of as a child. If not as a child then as a man.
I'm not annoyed, I'm just concerned.

Concerned about your lack of knowledge of woman ... being that you are a woman. (I think)
Keep your concern for yourself. You need it more. :wink:
Author:  jurupa [ Sun Sep 26, 2010 12:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I overthink everything. I just like focusing on the little details. Just how I do it.
Dude you are going to kill your self doing that. True me. I did that and it made me worse with girls not better.
Author:  jurupa [ Sun Sep 26, 2010 12:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Is being a social, talkative, friendly guy a DHV? I don't think so.
In real life it can be. As most game is mostly about being social and being about to interact with people.
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