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Getting VERY frustrated
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Author:  Steel654 [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:15 am ]
Post subject:  Getting VERY frustrated

plentyoffish.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=21129523

^^^My profile

So I've been sending messages like crazy to HBs & I've have a few nibbles - I've got two dates at the end of the week. But that's out of about 80 messages or so that I've sent.

I've tried taking some things from this forum to write in the 'About Me' section, as well as when sending out messages. Yet so many girls simply say "hi how are you?: and then stop replying.

The girls I've gotten numbers from respond really well on MSN to my banter - almost all of them have said they can't figure me out & that I'm great fun to talk to. Mostly HB 7s & 8s. I've gotten 4 numbers so far, haven't bothered setting up more dates just yet.

This is what I send in msgs:

Hey you, just thought I'd say you seem cool and you don't have your head all the way up your rear-end.

I'd like to hangout and find out more about you.

Cheers,
[NAME HERE]

PS: Only if you think you can handle me that is.


What am I doing wrong here?

Author:  -Ember- [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:26 am ]
Post subject: 

As far as I know, all of the pick up is done in the real world, not on the internet. Just go out and try your stuff. You wouldn't expect to see major pick up artists doing online dating, it doesn't work. You seem to be able to talk to them well enough. You would have a MUCH better chance in the real world.

Author:  AverageFrustratedChump [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:31 am ]
Post subject: 

I'm sorry but I could not disagree more. I just ended a long relationship and online sarging seems to be a perfectly good way to pick up girls. Mainly because there are so many girls to choose from, but also because the competition isn't very stiff. I think what you've done wrong with your opener is you're negging them right away. The first thing you say is a neg, which turns them off. Instead of being an irresistable asshole you're just being an asshole. Also that's too early to ask to hang out. If you're trying to hang out with them before they ever say a word to you, you're going to have to be alot more clever. No offense or anything bro just trying to be helpful.

Author:  Steel654 [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:31 am ]
Post subject: 

Thanks for your reply man.

I like to alternate between online & offline. Honestly, I probably do spend more time doing it online though because I like to be able to think before I speak. But I have definitely gotten to a point now where I can hold in person convos & phone convos without any real drama. Girls always tell me I have a hot voice and in person, I've kissed closed the vast majority.

There's been a few F closes as well. There were two girls I slept with on the day I met them, both of which I ended up being in a relationship after a period of time. I don't have any issues in the bedroom/escalating.

Honestly, I do still get a bit nervous when approaching but I do my best to ignore it & remain congruent. It really seems online, girls are a lot more shallow & don't take it seriously.

Many thanks for being constructive, I'll change my opener a bit & report back! :)

Author:  AverageFrustratedChump [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:33 am ]
Post subject: 

Yeah, haha I just made a plentyoffish account a few hours ago. We should collaborate about what works and what doesn't.

Author:  Steel654 [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:42 am ]
Post subject: 

Okay here's my revised message, I normally use a totally random title like "goats milk & bubblegum!!!":

Hey you, just thought I'd say you seem cool and refreshing. You also don't seem to have your head up your backside. Kudos!

I wouldn't mind having a chat with you to find out more about you!

Cheers,
Mick

PS: BUT there's a catch, you're going to have to try to keep up with me hehe.


What do you think?

Author:  AverageFrustratedChump [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 10:50 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Okay here's my revised message, I normally use a totally random title like "goats milk & bubblegum!!!":

Hey you, just thought I'd say you seem cool and refreshing. You also don't seem to have your head up your backside. Kudos!

I wouldn't mind having a chat with you to find out more about you!

Cheers,
Mick

PS: BUT there's a catch, you're going to have to try to keep up with me hehe.


What do you think?
yeah i use "hey you" too. i feel like it's very alpha. i think that if the previous one has only gotten 2/80 like you said then you should go back to the drawing board. i just started today and i've tried a variety of things. i used hey you, hey how are you, for a couple i asked them questions about their profiles, and for one i even pretended that i met her the other night. i'm doing this just to get a feel about what works. i think that online sarging has the potential to be a fucking goldmine. it can be done when you're bored at home. the key is you can't let it get too time consuming because that defeats the purpose. it's like pickup artistry on the side only you can't let it replace picking up girls in real life.

Author:  Brah [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 11:39 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Okay here's my revised message, I normally use a totally random title like "goats milk & bubblegum!!!":

Hey you, just thought I'd say you seem cool and refreshing. You also don't seem to have your head up your backside. Kudos!

I wouldn't mind having a chat with you to find out more about you!

Cheers,
Mick

PS: BUT there's a catch, you're going to have to try to keep up with me hehe.


What do you think?
This is terrible. you'll continue to only get a 1 in 40 response rate until you stop sending standard form messages. Why not take some time to read the girl's profile before you send her the message? In between your two sentences, insert two new and original sentences that are tailored to each specific girl's profile that actually use words/phrases/interests lifted directly from her profile. that will help you a bit.

Author:  Steel654 [ Tue Jul 27, 2010 11:54 am ]
Post subject: 

Thanks for the advice mate, much appreciated. As you suggested, I sent out about 20 replies tonight & inserted several personal things I noticed in their profile. So far 3 have been read but not responded to. The rest are still unread.

Will report back.

Author:  AverageFrustratedChump [ Wed Jul 28, 2010 2:13 am ]
Post subject: 

I think that online sarging is more like real life than you think. An HB in a bar is constantly hit on, and it's even worse for girls online. You want to try and say things that they aren't hearing from every single other guy, and you also want to escalate faster/smoother.

Author:  Steel654 [ Wed Jul 28, 2010 3:04 am ]
Post subject: 

Still no more luck so far. Most have been read/deleted. I'm going to the mall today so I'm going to try some more game.

Who dares, wins, right? lol

Author:  Solteris [ Wed Jul 28, 2010 5:55 am ]
Post subject: 

Eh, I never really messed with Plenty of Fish...but I still made an account lol. I had a similar problem, I lacked alot of passion typing this out online and just ended up sending a bunch of boring "How are you?" type messages with little to no responses. So I tried something different, with all of the replies I sent out with this change. 7/10 I got responses from. All I did was say something to the effect of:

"Hey! I noticed you said you liked (Random hobby/interest in their "about me") Sorry to hear :( Well, I guess everyone has their flaws. You seemed pretty cool but im not so sure now. I guess I could give you a chance."

Haha, thats actually my template from all of those messages and I got responses. Im not into the online thing anymore and they never went anywhere but I did get responses from this.

Author:  jurupa [ Wed Jul 28, 2010 7:42 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Still no more luck so far. Most have been read/deleted. I'm going to the mall today so I'm going to try some more game.
Using lines/openers like the one you posted above is not going to get you anywhere. Be more creative with a stock opener or use something on the girl's profile as an opener. You do way better.
Quote:
Who dares, wins, right? lol
More like one can not get the reward without taking risks.

Author:  jurupa [ Wed Jul 28, 2010 7:44 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
I think that online sarging is more like real life than you think. An HB in a bar is constantly hit on, and it's even worse for girls online. You want to try and say things that they aren't hearing from every single other guy, and you also want to escalate faster/smoother.
Your right that girls online get hit on way more than in real life. But the thing is most guys online use non interesting one liners. Most of which are on the lines of "your hot". So really one would think online gaming would be easier when your competition is using such lines. But yet its not.

Author:  Graybeard [ Wed Jul 28, 2010 12:02 pm ]
Post subject: 

If you must use stock/mass type copy and paste type messages take the time to go in and edit the girl's name into the message. It makes it come across as being a bit more personal. We all know how it feels to get some crummy stock message from a girl. Personally, I usually don't respond when I get one. It doesn't take much to seem like you are in the moment with what you write. We have some type of weather every day. You can always throw in "Is it raining out your way? It's pouring here." It's not exciting at all. But it makes your message seem more legit. If stumbling to get responses then experiment with openers with people a bit further away. It lets you practice but doesn't cut into your local dating pool. I talk to people outside of my state all the time though. It passes time. Even with the distance, many are willing to still meet up and most that meet up want to make the most of the limited time together. Then again, I'd almost prefer not having someone right down the road where they can bother me all of the time.

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