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Need a PUA to Critique my facebook bio.
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=50&t=69585		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  k1ngk0ng [ Sun Jun 20, 2010 8:10 am ]
Post subject:  Need a PUA to Critique my facebook bio.
Hi there, im new to facebook and the PUA lifestyle. Im 19 year old male trying to get on this boat of picking up women. please read my bio and criticize it. be honest, i want to see if there is anyway i can improve it.


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Hey, im Kishan. Also known as keesh! I remember when I got that name. It was freshman year and Becca Miller could'nt say my name right (still cant) so she called me keesh instead. It grew from there. Ok, back on track... I'm adventurous. I love traveling, road trips. I have an insane attraction to computers and cars. I take shit apart and put it back together. Whatever i see, all i need is my screwdriver kit. Haha, beware. There is a whole other side to me. In India I took Tae Kwon Do, and am continuing the education in Chico. from It I earned respect for my body and others. Even though I am a weapon, fighting is never the answer. Im not sayin i never beat the shit out of ppl. Just that I don't like to (you know who you are). Someone always ends up getting hurt. Whats next.... the party boy side. Yes. Get some alcohol in me and i am super flirty. I am poison, bad news for u. Don't let me influence u. Haha... That's enough, if u want to know more about me then just shoot me an e-mail or call me whatever. peace
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Author:  The Driver [ Sun Jun 20, 2010 3:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
I personally think its too long and full of pointless fluff. Too much swearing, an indirect threat and a reference to some random girl that they probably wont know :)

I woulda gone for something like;

"My name is Kishan! I like fishan!" (dunno if you like fishing - sounds funny tho... who cares? :D

or something :d
I dunno tho. Im not an uber PUA, or even close.

oh, and I, personally, wouldnt put "peace" at the end either :v
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