PUA Forum :: what is going on here??? lack of communication makes me!!

Ok I've been talking to this girl on internet for some months now she broke phone travels away to LA, then comes back gets into a bad wreck then she is basically in some care center where her parents don't tell her where and her "brother" was screening calls. I got through occasionally to her but couldn't like go see her or anything. Said she was there over a month.

We get along extremely well when we talk on phone and internet, Profile looks pretty real and its a pretty cute girl on phone, has plenty of pics.. Shes extremely hot 22 year old hispanic/indian girl. . .

Shes never once called me back to my knowledge, she recently put me as her top friend and change her status to in a relationship... She said it was because she was just interested in me... *wayy to reel me in*

Yesterday I said I wanted to hang out with her, and she answered it like she had a cold... And I asked if she was still on and she was like sureee but then never heard from her again.

Am I just getting played by like an actor or is this all just the worst luck, her not answering I normally give most like girls 2 shots to call back.......

Hmm well I sent her a message saying basically what you said browolf
"you have to start calling me back" , no I asked her bout webcam before cause I thought she was fake.. Took it as a "insult" Only bout 40min away not 2 bad....

... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ...

well shes been member on myspace since 10/06, and there was one guy on there he was her bf on there at one point..

hasn't talked with me in about 8 days so I should see her again online any day now lol!!

Quote:

... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ...

I agree with everything else apart from this bit. In my experience the longer you leave something online the less chance it has of becoming a real life relationship/meeting. It's quite rare for girls to suggest meeting so the man has to suggest/ask/tell them.

Quote:

... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ...

It kind of depends on how you play it. Generally speaking there's a relationship between the amount of time you spend getting to know each other online and how soon you have to ask before they start wondering why you are not asking and inevitably surmising reasons. You can pretty much guarantee those reasons won't be in your favour. Thus diminishing your chances of later success.

Ontop of that I think the more emotionally stable a girl is the less likely she is to ask ever.

Quote:

... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ...

Author:	flybeta [ Sat Nov 14, 2009 9:14 pm ]
Post subject:	what is going on here??? lack of communication makes me!!
Ok I've been talking to this girl on internet for some months now she broke phone travels away to LA, then comes back gets into a bad wreck then she is basically in some care center where her parents don't tell her where and her "brother" was screening calls. I got through occasionally to her but couldn't like go see her or anything. Said she was there over a month. We get along extremely well when we talk on phone and internet, Profile looks pretty real and its a pretty cute girl on phone, has plenty of pics.. Shes extremely hot 22 year old hispanic/indian girl. . . Shes never once called me back to my knowledge, she recently put me as her top friend and change her status to in a relationship... She said it was because she was just interested in me... wayy to reel me in Yesterday I said I wanted to hang out with her, and she answered it like she had a cold... And I asked if she was still on and she was like sureee but then never heard from her again. Am I just getting played by like an actor or is this all just the worst luck, her not answering I normally give most like girls 2 shots to call back.......

Author:	skypirate1965 [ Sun Nov 15, 2009 9:08 am ]
Post subject:	Re: what is going on here??? lack of communication makes me!
Quote: Ok I've been talking to this girl on internet for some months now she broke phone travels away to LA, then comes back gets into a bad wreck then she is basically in some care center where her parents don't tell her where and her "brother" was screening calls. I got through occasionally to her but couldn't like go see her or anything. Said she was there over a month. We get along extremely well when we talk on phone and internet, Profile looks pretty real and its a pretty cute girl on phone, has plenty of pics.. Shes extremely hot 22 year old hispanic/indian girl. . . Shes never once called me back to my knowledge, she recently put me as her top friend and change her status to in a relationship... She said it was because she was just interested in me... wayy to reel me in Yesterday I said I wanted to hang out with her, and she answered it like she had a cold... And I asked if she was still on and she was like sureee but then never heard from her again. Am I just getting played by like an actor or is this all just the worst luck, her not answering I normally give most like girls 2 shots to call back....... Is there a lot of physical geographic distance between you? If so then forget her , imho distance relationships do not work and she probably is just looking for a bit of online stuff to pass the time. Have you seen and spoke to her via webcam? If not try it as she may be fake If you've spent months chatting online and done several phone calls then I think you're in the cyber-friend zone.To be frank I think she likes your attention and this is just fantasy to her. "Shes never once called me back to my knowledge" I think that speaks volumes. Unless she has a perfectly valid reason why she cannot call you, then she is not making any effort... Sadly I think you should spend no more effort on her and let her go.Move on.

Author:	skypirate35 [ Sun Nov 15, 2009 10:50 am ]
Post subject:
it's like she's running push pull on you! and you've totally fallen into her frame, whatever that might be..... this should be a lesson in don't compromise your standards for anyone (without really good reasons). If they don't measure up, openly friendzone them straightaway. It might change the dynamics in your favour or it might not. Either way you get to say "my way or the highway"

Author:	flybeta [ Sun Nov 15, 2009 5:30 pm ]
Post subject:
Hmm well I sent her a message saying basically what you said browolf "you have to start calling me back" , no I asked her bout webcam before cause I thought she was fake.. Took it as a "insult" Only bout 40min away not 2 bad.... Not totally blind I messaged one of her other top friends, and he had planned on meeting her as well before her accident.. But she never gave him her new number apparently he kept begging me for it. Gonna check out of this emotionally no love on the internet

Author:	ThomasX [ Sun Nov 15, 2009 5:56 pm ]
Post subject:
Well post her profile. I'll figure out quickly if she's real or not lol

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what is going on here??? lack of communication makes me!! https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=50&t=55806	Page 1 of 1

Author:	tekryder [ Tue Nov 17, 2009 4:53 am ]
Post subject:
dont tell her "you have to call me back"... i just ruined my chance with a girl in a simular fashion, been talkin for a year but i never took it serious til one week she really wanted to meet up and was excited to see me, then some things came up.. then one week "this guy i like is getting locked up".. then a few days later i call her "he got locked up" and was crying.. havent heard from her in like 2 weeks and i sent messages like "hey im really feeling you, hope your feelin better".. then this past week i blew it by lettin my emotions get to me and saying "imma delete you if i cant see you blah blah".. so now im probably on her shit list.. im hoping to give it time and make a come back. but yeah dont let her know your thinking too much of it, ive learned from my mistake.

Author:	Graybeard [ Wed Nov 18, 2009 11:07 am ]
Post subject:
to me it sounds like the girl is a fake. it's common to have webcams nowadays and many of the new laptops come with them. i'd just be playful and ask for a sign like "flybeta is the best." or whatever. if she can take all kinds ofpics but can't take a pic holding a sign like that then obviously she is a phony. there is always the chance she has a bf. but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. with all of the excuses and taking the webcam question as an insult, it all sounds really fishy. if you like the online company, there isn't any harm to chatting. but i wouldn't hold out for anything. mentally cut your losses and move on. there are plenty of other people out there that are real and don't play so many games.

Author:	flybeta [ Fri Nov 20, 2009 9:29 pm ]
Post subject:
well shes been member on myspace since 10/06, and there was one guy on there he was her bf on there at one point.. hasn't talked with me in about 8 days so I should see her again online any day now lol!!

Author:	skypirate35 [ Sat Nov 21, 2009 9:48 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Hmm well I sent her a message saying basically what you said browolf "you have to start calling me back" , no I asked her bout webcam before cause I thought she was fake.. Took it as a "insult" Only bout 40min away not 2 bad.... You can't be saying things like that! It's instant DLV. And calling someone fake is an insult lol. actions speak louder than words and can be more mysterious. Women are often suspicious of webcams cos of guys that have "unexpectedly" gotten their equipment out or been really pushy about cam cyber sex. As such you have to disarm suspicions and have them trusting you.

Author:	skypirate1965 [ Sat Nov 21, 2009 10:08 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: ... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ... I agree with everything else apart from this bit. In my experience the longer you leave something online the less chance it has of becoming a real life relationship/meeting. It's quite rare for girls to suggest meeting so the man has to suggest/ask/tell them.

Author:	skypirate35 [ Sat Nov 21, 2009 10:31 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: ... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ... I agree with everything else apart from this bit. In my experience the longer you leave something online the less chance it has of becoming a real life relationship/meeting. It's quite rare for girls to suggest meeting so the man has to suggest/ask/tell them. It kind of depends on how you play it. Generally speaking there's a relationship between the amount of time you spend getting to know each other online and how soon you have to ask before they start wondering why you are not asking and inevitably surmising reasons. You can pretty much guarantee those reasons won't be in your favour. Thus diminishing your chances of later success. Ontop of that I think the more emotionally stable a girl is the less likely she is to ask ever.

Author:	skypirate1965 [ Sun Nov 22, 2009 9:14 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: Quote: ... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ... I agree with everything else apart from this bit. In my experience the longer you leave something online the less chance it has of becoming a real life relationship/meeting. It's quite rare for girls to suggest meeting so the man has to suggest/ask/tell them. It kind of depends on how you play it. Generally speaking there's a relationship between the amount of time you spend getting to know each other online and how soon you have to ask before they start wondering why you are not asking and inevitably surmising reasons. You can pretty much guarantee those reasons won't be in your favour. Thus diminishing your chances of later success. Ontop of that I think the more emotionally stable a girl is the less likely she is to ask ever. True. I have had girls basically say slow down.I just had one girl online who was asking me about 10 questions before she would give out her phone number. I actually answered her questions either truthfully and vague or in a funny way. I spent about 5 minutes only on this. Mailled her and I now have her number.She even apologised in a way for 'being tough with me'. It's important to realise that for a lot of girls online IS scary. Building enough trust IS important before meeting. Though if you do not move things forward promptly you do end up in the virtual friend zone.

Author:	Graybeard [ Sun Nov 22, 2009 12:08 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: ... but if there is a spark and youv'e been talking for awhile, meeting is going to be something that you don't have to even press for. ... I agree with everything else apart from this bit. In my experience the longer you leave something online the less chance it has of becoming a real life relationship/meeting. It's quite rare for girls to suggest meeting so the man has to suggest/ask/tell them. I do agree that interest can wane and like it or not things can just fade into an internet only thing. I think that usually you can get a rough vibe about someone's interest level. You have to monitor that sort of thing. There is only so much of a window and it can pass you by. But whenever i'm talking to girls online, it's mostly to kill time and have a few laughs. I generally haven't worried so much about rushing out there if there is slight interest. I think there are also advantages to going a bit slower. When online, the girls only have so much to go on, so what they aren't sure about they create for themselves in their mind. They are going to paint a positive picture about you. If you are picking up someone at let's say a bar, you want them to to create this better than reality version of yourself. It's a bit like watching commercials on tv. I've been to Mcdonald's many times in my life but I've yet to recieve a Big Mac that looks anywhere as good as the ones in the commercials. We all want to be thought of as the commerical Big Mac and not the real life Big Mac. I think the net is a good tool in creating that and even better than a real world pick up in that way. For me, and this goes against many of the teachings that you get for this, but I go a bit on the slow side. I would never say it's the route others should go and by all means go with what works. But normally when I get to chatting with someone, I weave between friend and pursuer. If you mix it up you stay out of the friend zone. By going a little slow you have them chomping at the bit to hang out and you can create anticipation. Personally I find that by the time of a date rolls around they have already planned on having sex that night if i pursue it. The more you talk to women the more they all seem the same. Yes there are subcategories or types, but if you did something that worked on one girl, odds are it will work on others. I got a bit off point there. Sorry about that. I just wanted to bring up some other thoughts for anyone reading.

Author:	skypirate1965 [ Mon Nov 23, 2009 11:01 am ]
Post subject:
Good points. I try to retain some flexibility in my approach online. If I stuck hard and fast to my rules , I would never have got that girls number. You have to view it like warfare and sometimes you have to lose a bit of a small battle to win the war. It all depends on how willing you are to compromise. On a side note and not on topic. I just heard from a woman I'd gamed online and met twice and was practically promised some fairly kinky sex. I did post asking for advice previously on this. I may even find the link. I thought she was a bit of a pricktease. It just happens she has totally backtracked and she said she doesn't do casual sex and considers me a good friend. Obviously so good that she's not willing to fuck me! Oh well, I sent her a mail basically telling her to move on as I am - I'm not being someones 'friend' after that game.

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