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Directly asking for a date
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=50&t=41745
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Author:  tiemnao [ Tue Mar 17, 2009 10:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Directly asking for a date

I was tired with very low reply rates and how it never went past chatting anyway, and tried something else instead - I'm just asking girls out for a date right away. I just write a long and detailed message (written once, spammed a lot) about what kind of date I would like to go for (always something highly unusual), and ask her if she's interested in trying that out in my first message.

I'm getting a lot more replies now, some of them very enthusiastic, some not interested in the date but just want to chat, but I failed to close any of them. Any helpful tips? I find it frustrating that I get so many flashes of interest and attraction from girls live and online and I cannot convert them to anything lasting.

Author:  JSmooth [ Tue Mar 17, 2009 11:07 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Directly asking for a date

Quote:
I was tired with very low reply rates and how it never went past chatting anyway, and tried something else instead - I'm just asking girls out for a date right away. I just write a long and detailed message (written once, spammed a lot) about what kind of date I would like to go for (always something highly unusual), and ask her if she's interested in trying that out in my first message.

I'm getting a lot more replies now, some of them very enthusiastic, some not interested in the date but just want to chat, but I failed to close any of them. Any helpful tips? I find it frustrating that I get so many flashes of interest and attraction from girls live and online and I cannot convert them to anything lasting.
When you say "close" do you mean # close, date close, Kiss close, F-close?

Can you get dates but no realationships? Because then your problem wouldn't necessarily be online game.

Can you get responses but no dates? Because then it would be about your online process.

Help me narrow it down so we can work on it together.

Author:  tiemnao [ Wed Mar 18, 2009 12:01 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Directly asking for a date

Quote:
When you say "close" do you mean # close, date close, Kiss close, F-close?
I mean I cannot get date close.

My goal right now is getting reliable date closing from online dating. If I cannot go there, I cannot really go any further.

Author:  JSmooth [ Wed Mar 18, 2009 1:53 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Directly asking for a date

Quote:
Quote:
When you say "close" do you mean # close, date close, Kiss close, F-close?
I mean I cannot get date close.

My goal right now is getting reliable date closing from online dating. If I cannot go there, I cannot really go any further.
Okay, now that I understand the problem we can certainly fix this. There are basically one small part and one big part to getting a date, whether you are on dating sites or networking sites.

Small Part> Attraction. You need a descent amount of attraction before getting the girl. Some of the attraction is going to be assumed because she is responding back to you. And we know she can see our profile on the webpage.

Still there are things that need to be displayed to increase this intitial feeling. Typical DHV or Attraction Spikes like Pre-Selection, Leader of men, Protector of Loved Ones, Non-needy behaviour can be demonstrated in our conversations with the other person to create attraction. Of course you can use teasing, false disqualifiers, and other things too.

Bigger Part> Comfort and Connections. This is the part most of the guys I talk to on a daily basis have trouble with. You have some basic situational comfort and rapport just from emailing back and forth without saying anything creepy.

The hardest part for most guys is the Connection part of it. Actually, discussing things that are deeper than what most guys talk about. Most guys are quick to talk about their hobbies, where they hang, teams they like, friends, and that's about it.

When you start getting into actually talking about some of the experiences you've had in your life and then asking her if she can relate you build a connection. You might talk to her about the time you got in trouble as a kid for whatever, and you ask her if she ever did anything like that. Then she tells you a story, and a connection is made. She sees a part of her inside you.

Creating these connections and deeper rapport is essential in getting more dates. Otherwise, most women think "I don't really know him that well. What am I going to talk about on the date?" By creating a few of these connections they have some insight into your personality beyond just basic chit chat and attraction building.

If you do this stuff before setting up the date your success rate will go up. Of course, make sure to meet in a public place, and offer her to bring a friend along if she wants. It makes you look safer and not as 'skeezy' as my girlfriend would say.

Let me know how it works out.

Author:  nightrider767 [ Wed Mar 18, 2009 6:09 pm ]
Post subject: 

Smooth WTF!?! Man you nailed that one! Really well crafted post.

Tiem,, you say you got "flashes" of interest. Does that mean that after the opening, you let things drag.... Do the stuff that Smooth put out. Keep in mind, don't send anything unless it's a winner. One lame email can ruin it.

Also consider what you are up against. The chicks you are after are probably getting hit on by ten other guys at the same time. At least. Hot women get about 50 emails every day.

Two things to learn from that. First, that means that everything you send is really important. If you can't think of anything really good, sit on it till you do.

The other thing is that with all that attention,,, it's a major ego boost for the chick. Shit, she's got a fan club now... There is a very good chance that she now believes that she "qualifies" for way better than she actually merits. So keep that in mind.

You want a lady who wants to meet up. So get in there, set the hook and go for the date. If she's not up for that, it may not be you. It may be that she's:

Married/ got a boyfriend
Mis-representing herself and hiding
Not emotional open to actually meeting someone from the internet
Just adores the attention and has no real desire to meet anyone, short of the real Brad Pitt.
Or a ton of other reasons.

So find out if she actually wants to meet people and then move on.

Those are roadblocks for anyone. If roadblocks are a problem, find more roads. Us SMooths techniques to generate more interessts and attraction. And if you're still not getting what you want, increase your exposure. If the percentages are low, increase the numbers.....

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