PUA Forum
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/

So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=50&t=164845		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Stryker112 [ Fri Jun 28, 2013 6:32 am ]
Post subject:  So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Long story short, I got tired of being/feeling like a pussified manlet and decided to commit fully to the PUA community. It's difficult for me to even begin to describe exactly what I've been choosing to put up with for this past week, let alone my whole life... but I will say one thing is for certain: I am a loner who has been dealing with INTENSE internal toxic shame and It's practically seeping out of each and every one of my pores. I'm here today, because a recent string of events have sparked and lit a HUGE fire under my ass -- enough to go ahead and make me do something/anything about it. I'm a "nice guy", but really don't want to be anymore.

For those of you won't don't already know (I introduced myself yesterday), I'm a 27-year-old guy who stands at 5'8" tall and weighs approximately 112 lbs. No... I'm not trolling. Yes, I am "that small". No... I won't "eat something", just because you tell me to; I've had a stripper tell me to eat a cheezeburger just because I turned down her $300 VIP "special". And yes, I know you can "shit bricks larger than me". I'm not here for ANY that. I'm not here for tips and pointers on how to "get jacked". Why? Because I'm already shredded; I have a unique ottermode/athletic build that closely resembles that of Bruce Lee -- don't get me wrong, I'm still "smaller" than Bruce was at his prime. But the thing that got me to come here today is that women (strippers mostly) keep telling me that I'm a "7" as far as looks are concerned. These chicks dig my body, but the egoless betamale disposition is screwing me over each and every time. I want to be seen as an egoless alpha, but lack most of the "abilities" that go hand in hand with being able to pull such a feat off.

So here's my question: If you guys had a body just like mine (a 26 inch waist, 32 inch hips, and a body fat percentage of 4.7%), how would you use this to your full advantage in regards to sarging (I hope I'm using the right term here...) on OkCupid?
Author:  braaaaap [ Fri Jun 28, 2013 10:24 am ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
You talk about your looks way too much bro.... And they have nothing to do with being an egoless beta male or egoless alpha male. It's all in your head. I really recommend reading this thread about inner game before you start making some big moves - I think it's the best thing anyone ever wrote on this forum and it really opened my eyes... frame-control-defining-reality-and-bein ... 34530.html
Author:  ix. [ Fri Jun 28, 2013 11:56 am ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
haha stop putting so much emphasis on your body for a start. I'm 5'11 and 116lbs. I am significantly skinnier than you. The difference is. I don't care.

Here's the thing: Some girls like skinny guys other girls don't. If you accept that and stop worrying about it then your whole attitude will be better.

Your problem, as i see it, is you're far too self-absorbed and interested in qualifying yourself. Saying "I'm skinny but I am fit/muscular/whatever" when nobody has even asked you if you care highlights some real self-confidence issues. If that comes across to girls (which it will, you wrote 3 paragraphs here and 95% of it was trying to qualify yourself to us and seek our approval).

As polishmatt said, it's attitude not looks that are going to make a difference here, and from what you've posted so far, your attitude is quite a long way off attractive.
Author:  Stryker112 [ Fri Jun 28, 2013 5:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Quote:
You talk about your looks way too much bro.... And they have nothing to do with being an egoless beta male or egoless alpha male. It's all in your head. I really recommend reading this thread about inner game before you start making some big moves - I think it's the best thing anyone ever wrote on this forum and it really opened my eyes... frame-control-defining-reality-and-bein ... 34530.html
Thanks. This is stuff I can use to my full advantage.
Author:  Stryker112 [ Fri Jun 28, 2013 5:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Quote:
haha stop putting so much emphasis on your body for a start. I'm 5'11 and 116lbs. I am significantly skinnier than you. The difference is. I don't care.

Here's the thing: Some girls like skinny guys other girls don't. If you accept that and stop worrying about it then your whole attitude will be better.

Your problem, as i see it, is you're far too self-absorbed and interested in qualifying yourself. Saying "I'm skinny but I am fit/muscular/whatever" when nobody has even asked you if you care highlights some real self-confidence issues. If that comes across to girls (which it will, you wrote 3 paragraphs here and 95% of it was trying to qualify yourself to us and seek our approval).

As polishmatt said, it's attitude not looks that are going to make a difference here, and from what you've posted so far, your attitude is quite a long way off attractive.
I now see that my biggest problem is my overactive self-consciousness. And now that I know it doesn't matter, I can correct it. I wasn't seeking "approval". I never saw the problem until now.
Author:  ix. [ Fri Jun 28, 2013 7:18 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
You weren't seeking approval consciously, and it can be difficult to spot from the inside but saying "I'm skinny, but these chicks dig my body" comes across as a kind of pre-emptive assumption about what people are going to say, which means you are worrying about it too much. Nobody asked, you brought it up, and made a big deal of it. That's the problem and it's not attractive.

Generally you want to avoid qualifying yourself. Once you start making excuses (in this case being muscular) for what you see as your weaknesses (In this case being skinny) all it does it highlight your insecurity about your perceived weakness.

I can understand it though, about 3 or 4 years ago I used to worry so much about being skinny. I got quite muscular, it's so easy to look toned when you're this small. But I was still skinny, it's genetic. Nothing I can really do about it. However, after meeting a HB10 and then shortly after a HB8 who said things like "I love how skinny you are" it boosted my confidence, a lot and ever since then I stopped caring because I know there's plenty of girls out there who go for skinny guys. FYI, skinny guys can get away with wearing pretty much *anything* that fat/muscular guys just look silly in. I use this to my full advantage.
Author:  flybeta [ Sun Jun 30, 2013 12:01 am ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Your body needs fat you shouldn't be 112lbs at that height your not eating enough, eat regularly you should be able to at least gain 10-12lbs fast. Granted you might be stuck around that point until your 30's.

4.7% is very unhealthy weight for a guy your body is starving itself..
Author:  TheFury [ Mon Jul 01, 2013 2:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
If you really want to have this shitty body (in my opinion) that's fine. But definitely you are too insecure about it. I also hate to break it to you but your body is not an asset at 5'8" 112lbs. So what you actually want is to not bring it up/ignore it. etc. It isn't an asset. Just ignore it, be confident, and write a good profile. Showing off your abs, for example, may get you more meetings, but it would be misleading and when a girl sees what a twig you are, she will feel misled and the date will just be a waste of time.
Author:  Stryker112 [ Tue Jul 02, 2013 7:58 am ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Quote:
If you really want to have this shitty body (in my opinion) that's fine. But definitely you are too insecure about it. I also hate to break it to you but your body is not an asset at 5'8" 112lbs. So what you actually want is to not bring it up/ignore it. etc. It isn't an asset. Just ignore it, be confident, and write a good profile. Showing off your abs, for example, may get you more meetings, but it would be misleading and when a girl sees what a twig you are, she will feel misled and the date will just be a waste of time.
I have been showing off my abs:
Image

I've messaged over 100 girls in the last week alone. Only 15 out of the 100 replied. I asked one girl if she wanted to be my workout buddy. She said "Yes". So I replied "Send me your digits and we'll make it happen." She said "I'll think about it." and never responded back. I messaged her a day later asking if she had made up her mind yet. She never responded back, so I nixed it. Obviously, I'm doing something wrong here. Obviously, that something has to be that I have no "game". But why? If I'm not at work and It's not unbearably hot out, I wear this:
Image
Author:  Stryker112 [ Tue Jul 02, 2013 8:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
I'm determined to find a girl who's willing to meet up for a jog/run. I messaged yet another girl saying:

Me: Sup cutie? What's your name?

*Just seconds later* Girl: Torianna

Me: That's a pretty name. You a jogger Torianna?

*It's been 5 minutes and I'm still waiting for a response*

Seriously, wtf am I doing wrong here?
Author:  ix. [ Tue Jul 02, 2013 10:43 am ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
This one is really easy: Your opener was terrible. Read through some of the openers on this forum and use those. Any girl will get hundreds of "Hi how are you?" type messages.

Your opener should do at lest one of these

-Make her want to know more about you
-Invoke an emotional response
-Make her laugh

I'm surprised that she replied but I suppose it was little effort on her part. Your response to her answer was inane. You could have said "Do you get many funny looks with such an unusual name?" or inquired about where the name comes from, anything.

Q&A messages (and real life conversations) are awful. They go nowhere, they're boring for everyone and simply will never build attraction.
Author:  TheFury [ Tue Jul 02, 2013 12:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Read okCupid's blog about first messages. cutie is a terrible word, so is beautiful, so is sexy etc. DON'T USE THESE. Write something relating to their profile or use a % opener (hey, it says we are only 35% enemy.. want to try to get that number up to 75% ;) something like that if you want easy and generic, or write something thoughtful based on their profile that is 1 line long (maybe 2 at most). That should up your response rate from like 15% to probably 30-40%.
Author:  Profile Diva [ Wed Jul 10, 2013 1:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Quote:
If you really want to have this shitty body (in my opinion) that's fine. But definitely you are too insecure about it. I also hate to break it to you but your body is not an asset at 5'8" 112lbs. So what you actually want is to not bring it up/ignore it. etc. It isn't an asset. Just ignore it, be confident, and write a good profile. Showing off your abs, for example, may get you more meetings, but it would be misleading and when a girl sees what a twig you are, she will feel misled and the date will just be a waste of time.
Good advice, although from a woman's POV, you don't have a shitty body. Pretty harsh in my opinion. Judging from your pic you have a GREAT body, just small, but that's fine. There are plenty of short, small guys who get plenty of fantastic women. Did you know Tom Cruise, Johnny Depp, Daniel Craig, Matt Damon, Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino, and Robert DiNero, are all 5'10" or shorter??

It's all about fitness and personality and charisma - not size. Sure, tall and big are assets, but trust me on this, personality is a MUCH bigger asset in attracting women. There are plenty of petite women (5' - 5'5") who would find you just the right size. If you're so busy worrying about your body you'll never develop a confident, fun personality. Very, very few of us look like professional athletes, movie stars, or swimsuit models, so we all have to come to terms with our limitations (looks wise) and just be the best we can be and be happy with that.

TheFury is right though when he says just ignore it, be confident and have a good profile. If you need some help in writing a confident, attractive online profile with no gimicks, games or tactics - check out my guides and other advice at http://www.profilediva.net/guides.html

Good luck and seriously, give yourself more credit. Be happy and confident in who you are and that will be all the attraction power you need.

Best of luck,
Author:  TheFury [ Wed Jul 10, 2013 2:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
His pic makes it look like he has a good body.. but that pic is very misleading given the stats he described... in real life, he will be tiny, and as I'm sure you know, false advertising is one of the best ways to have no success w/online dating.
Quote:
Quote:
If you really want to have this shitty body (in my opinion) that's fine. But definitely you are too insecure about it. I also hate to break it to you but your body is not an asset at 5'8" 112lbs. So what you actually want is to not bring it up/ignore it. etc. It isn't an asset. Just ignore it, be confident, and write a good profile. Showing off your abs, for example, may get you more meetings, but it would be misleading and when a girl sees what a twig you are, she will feel misled and the date will just be a waste of time.
Good advice, although from a woman's POV, you don't have a shitty body. Pretty harsh in my opinion. Judging from your pic you have a GREAT body, just small, but that's fine. There are plenty of short, small guys who get plenty of fantastic women. Did you know Tom Cruise, Johnny Depp, Daniel Craig, Matt Damon, Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino, and Robert DiNero, are all 5'10" or shorter??

It's all about fitness and personality and charisma - not size. Sure, tall and big are assets, but trust me on this, personality is a MUCH bigger asset in attracting women. There are plenty of petite women (5' - 5'5") who would find you just the right size. If you're so busy worrying about your body you'll never develop a confident, fun personality. Very, very few of us look like professional athletes, movie stars, or swimsuit models, so we all have to come to terms with our limitations (looks wise) and just be the best we can be and be happy with that.

TheFury is right though when he says just ignore it, be confident and have a good profile. If you need some help in writing a confident, attractive online profile with no gimicks, games or tactics - check out my guides and other advice at http://www.profilediva.net/guides.html

Good luck and seriously, give yourself more credit. Be happy and confident in who you are and that will be all the attraction power you need.

Best of luck,
Author:  GKS [ Wed Jul 10, 2013 2:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: So I Finally Decided To Commit And Go All Out...
Why do women like guys with great body? Not entirely because of how buff or cut they look, but they are attracted to the dedication, goal-oriented and self-discipline that they have.

As for your "game", I agreed you have none. Online dating is a bit different than day game due to the fact it lacks of person to person interaction and the ability to fully express your personality. In real life, you can just walk up to a girl and say "hi you're cute, give me your number". It would definitely work if you do it right with confidence and good body languages. Seeing someone in flesh standing in front of you create comfort between the two people. However, with online dating, you don't have this luxury. You start with zero comfort. She doesn't know who you are or whether if you're a creep or serial killer, so definitely she won't be giving out her number to you. Try to create more comfort before number close and do make it fun. Engage her emotional rather than just stay on fluffy talk.

EX: "Why do you like jogging? Is it because of the runner high? etc.... vs "so you're a jogger?"

Another key point is anticipating their responses when you ask a question. "so you're a jogger?" - what do you think she would answer with? Either "yea" or "no". If a question doesn't serve its purpose to get you closer to closing, DO NOT ASK.
Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/