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shyness is ruining my life
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Author:  jcl85 [ Fri Dec 17, 2010 6:15 pm ]
Post subject:  shyness is ruining my life
Hey

I have been really shy my whole life and im so fed up with it, I always thought it would just get better as I got older but it hasn't improved at all and im 25 now.

It happens with guys and girls, even things like getting my haircut are always so awkward and I must come off so dull, when im with my friends im not quiet at all, I am confident and fun but even if one of them brings one of there friends out that I dont know I will hardly say a word..I just dont know what to say whereas when im with my friends I dont even have to think.

I haven't had a gf for 3 years now, Im not bad looking and I have a real gd job which allows me to go and live anywhere in the world making very good money. Given that, I feel like I have the chance to have an awesome life but I just cant get over this shyness.

Pleease help

Thanks
Author:  IvanDyn [ Sat Dec 18, 2010 1:29 am ]
Post subject: 
hey man,

I hear ya. I know exactly what it's like, I've been traveling myself over the world in the past and I had the same problem. Luckily I could overcome that.

What I guess is that you have a lot of deep emotional blockages stuck in your unconscious mind (this is what usually causes shyness), many times it's some shame or guilt issues that you are not even aware of.

I suggest you look into some energy healing practices. The one I use is EFT, because so far it has been the most powerful one and it has changed my life i a very short time. You can use it to get rid of of all the crap that is holding you back from being more alive and vibrant. Once you do that, you will have women all over you :). The only issue is to find a suitable coach.

pm me if you have more questions.

Cheers,
Ivan.
Author:  puadk [ Sat Dec 18, 2010 5:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Overcoming shyness with professional help
Hey brow,

You problem with shyness sounds to be a big problem for you :(
What i notice in your post is the feeling of the awkward situations wich is also
a big problem for me to. Maybe you could try to contact a hypnotherapist to
get rid of the feelings :wink: that is what i will do.
Author:  speedfeed [ Sat Dec 25, 2010 6:38 am ]
Post subject: 
I know exactly what your saying, I'd say that I should be more desirable than 75% of guys (I look great, have a great job) but, I never get with the girls I want, I even try with girls that I think aren't even of the quality that I think I should be able to get, but yet I still F it up with them, that's what really frustrates me. I'm generally very confident in every other area of life, but I just flop when it comes to women.
Author:  MynameisFisher [ Sat Dec 25, 2010 7:32 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'm not shy with my friends, not shy if at least one of my friends is with me in the group. Not shy if noone knows noone(like in the camp just before first year @ the university). And not shy if it comes to 1-2 women. However, if I'm all alone and try to open a mixed set which consits of people who know each other well while I don't have anyone around, that's when I'm fucked. Working on that :)
Author:  zeus11 [ Wed Jan 05, 2011 5:58 am ]
Post subject: 
I too am dealing with this man and something that i found to work REALLY well is visualisation/mediation. Basically all you do is sit down, RELAX, take deep breathes and let go of all your worries and fears for the next couple of minutes..just relax! Then you visualise a social setting in which you want to be more confident in..imagine how you want to be talking, standing, imagine how confident you are, imagine that you are at your best in that social setting. Try to incorporate as much sensory as you can..how your body would be feeling, what you would be smelling, hearing etc...IMAGINE IT VERY CLEARLY AND HOW YOU WANT TO BE IN THAT SOCIAL SETTING and magnify that feeling 3x! After you feel really confident and you feel like you cant be more confident you can either ANCHOR a word ad a body movement (which i recomend) or you can just continue with your day. What i recomend with the anchor is making the A-Ok sign with your index finger and thumb and say YES as you anchor all those feelings into that sign...MAKE SURE YOU ANCHOR WHEN YOU ARE FEELING THE MOST CONFIDENT IN YOUR VISUALISATION!! Once you have done that just forget about it...then repeat this exercise 3x a week or more if you like...the more the better. Then use the anchor once you find yourself in that situation and BOOM your subconcious mind kicks in thinking that your are what you told yourself you are in that situation and you become super confident and cocky!! enjoy
Author:  MynameisFisher [ Wed Jan 05, 2011 4:46 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I too am dealing with this man and something that i found to work REALLY well is visualisation/mediation. Basically all you do is sit down, RELAX, take deep breathes and let go of all your worries and fears for the next couple of minutes..just relax! Then you visualise a social setting in which you want to be more confident in..imagine how you want to be talking, standing, imagine how confident you are, imagine that you are at your best in that social setting. Try to incorporate as much sensory as you can..how your body would be feeling, what you would be smelling, hearing etc...IMAGINE IT VERY CLEARLY AND HOW YOU WANT TO BE IN THAT SOCIAL SETTING and magnify that feeling 3x! After you feel really confident and you feel like you cant be more confident you can either ANCHOR a word ad a body movement (which i recomend) or you can just continue with your day. What i recomend with the anchor is making the A-Ok sign with your index finger and thumb and say YES as you anchor all those feelings into that sign...MAKE SURE YOU ANCHOR WHEN YOU ARE FEELING THE MOST CONFIDENT IN YOUR VISUALISATION!! Once you have done that just forget about it...then repeat this exercise 3x a week or more if you like...the more the better. Then use the anchor once you find yourself in that situation and BOOM your subconcious mind kicks in thinking that your are what you told yourself you are in that situation and you become super confident and cocky!! enjoy
Hypnotizing yourself. I like that. Maybe I'll try it thanks :)
Author:  LVATTEMPTS [ Thu Jan 13, 2011 1:56 am ]
Post subject: 
talk to your friends that your comftorable with and your family that you are cool with, and than if possible immeadilty talk to someone you dont know and the energy kind of shifts into the new conversation........obviously it isnt easy to talk to a good friend and than instantly switch to a HB9 or whoever it is, so if you are alone just imagine that person you are gonna talk to is an old friend and try to really,really bring that "good freind/family" tone into the conversation.... just my 2 cents
Author:  Capo4 [ Wed Feb 02, 2011 8:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
try a course of CBT to overcome your social anxiety and youle get over it try moodgym its free on the web
Author:  ArKiTeCk [ Thu Feb 24, 2011 1:27 am ]
Post subject: 
Alot and i mean alot of people have this feeling myself included. Anyway learn to develop an attitude known as the "Fuck it" attitude. Next time dont think just do it, if anything goes wrong so what... :D
Author:  Shift Happens [ Thu Feb 24, 2011 9:52 pm ]
Post subject: 
I know how you feel...

I used to deal with social shyness my whole life and you will overcome being shy with more practice and maturity. Keep doing your research and exploring new options and you will figure it out. Good luck bro!
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