PUA Forum :: the drastic change

I agree about not getting consumed. There will come a time when
this stuff becomes natural, that you stop playing games and start
being human. I think that was the whole point of "The Game"

The core principles, esp. what the dating gurus teach, have nothing to
do with being an a**hole; abusing, or manipulating women. It's about
growing, being more social, and being a man.

It's when guys take this stuff too far or start abusing it is when you
can be seen as negative. When being cocky/funny for instance; you
can use waaay too much cocky and not enough funny and you end
up sounding like a prick.

Though my progress has been slow, I'm surprised at how well my
friends accept any major changes I've made. That's why they are
your friends. They accept you for who you are and who you will be.
I wouldn't sever any ties. And make sure you aren't blaming them
when it's your methods that may need adjusting.

Author:	Dolphin [ Fri Sep 07, 2007 12:23 pm ]
Post subject:	the drastic change
Some background... Been in the game for about 10 months now and am going through a huge soul search/inner game/finding my path kinda thing. A stage we all must face. This has hit home for me big time and a lot of DYD material has helped me along the way. As an AFC back in the day I was very passive, quiet and an approval seeker/very clingy when it came to women. Man that sux! Now days I am getting far more out of this area called 'dating' than ever before, sweet! I'm at a turning point in my life where I am beginning to find my path and purpose in life but find my old AFC surroundings are holding me back i.e. friends, living arrangements etc. I'm sure many people have found themselves breaking off relationships with their old buddies and creating new more inspirational friendships that challenge and encourage your growth as a man! This is where I'm at. Finding myself a bunch of success models to hang with, share, learn and grow. Old friendships with buddies I've had for years are deteriorating and new friendships are on the horizon for me and I'm lovin’ it. Anyway, DYD says to surround yourself with success models every way you can; book, audio, video, friends etc. This is something I am now trying to adapt in my life, listening to audio when I exercise, watching vids when I have the time and developing better relationships with successful and like minded people. This also involves disconnecting with all the unsuccessful models in my life. As an AFC it is easy to attract a lot of unsuccessful models in your life. My living situation is tough as I am flatting with my best mate from high school. This was good at first but now after a year or so and 10 months into the game I have come to realise how much of a bad influence he has been to my life. His success with women is poor but still has a very alpha way about him. He doesn’t really get the steps in building attraction and isn't really doing anything about it. I've found it very hard to grow with this kind of person in my life. It is time to move on, break away and move out. Now, the idea of having my own space like a studio apartment where I can have DYD/Mystery/PUA material of any type running 24 seven on my lounge room TV is a dream come true... a place to further grow as a mature man, my own territory where I can complete my goals, have similar minded people over to discuss, laugh and practice this shit freely in an environment that doesn’t have to be so secretive! I think I am trying to convince myself more than anyone here but I wanna know what others have done to surround their selves with this stuff. What drastic changes have you made in your life? Dolphin

Author:	EvoJ [ Fri Sep 07, 2007 2:09 pm ]
Post subject:
This is just my opinion! Be warned! I am going to make this really short ... Don't Do That. One of the biggest pitfalls of a PUA is getting Too caught up in it. Don't let it take over your life. Just learn enough for it to Enhance what you already have. Just my two cents EvoJ P.S. Wow I actually kept it short... never did that before. Huh feels pretty good.

Author:	Dolphin [ Fri Sep 07, 2007 11:17 pm ]
Post subject:
cool man, thanks

Author:	Mr Fahrenheit [ Sat Sep 08, 2007 6:25 am ]
Post subject:
Nah, let it consume you. 'The Game' has taught us that even the most far-flung in this art can still latch unto and have a successful relationship. What the game dosen't say is that Neil Strauss kept working, he kept pursuing employemnt goals aswell as pua goals. So dont assume that 'The Game' was his life full stop. I only say let it consume you if you can pull yourself out of being imersed. And never sacrifice the other parts of your life for it.

Author:	BlackBull [ Sat Sep 08, 2007 4:16 pm ]
Post subject:
"When one attains great power,greed for more power takes over,and then the one who seeks power searches for more power,as to become the most powerful being on earth.However,as the one who gained power keeps gaining power,that one person notices that there will always be another with even greater power,and therefore,will do more things to gain more power,so that the person may have ALL the power,and rule with ultimate power.As he beats out all others who have attempted to gain power,that same person finds that,after wiping out all of his power-hungry competitors,still needs more power to satisfy his urges.This becomes the eternal curse of the never-ending quest for power,when all that person had to do was maintain and protect his already immense power.That is the revelation of ruin." Anyway,point is: Nothing is wrong with gaining everything related to pick up,but realize that if you want to immerse yourself in it,and keep gaining more and more,that you will never be satisfied on that aspect alone,and it would be much more sensible and rewarding to protect your influence at it's peak. "Know your limits" is the key principle.

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Author:	Dolphin [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 12:14 pm ]
Post subject:
Ok I should have reworded the whole 24 hours a day thing. I am aware that people do get cought up in this stuff so much that it consumes their life...not so good! But... What I really wanted to know was what have others done to be surrounded by successful models...ie Books they are reading, seminars they attend, friendships ended, beginning new ones, moved house etc... The drastic change! I'm sure alot of people on this site have changed a hell of a lot, but that's not always easy to do with your AFC surroundings Please share...

Author:	EvoJ [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 4:15 pm ]
Post subject:
I listen to confidence tapes and read different PUA books when I got to bed at night. I also am learning NLP just because it is interesting and it shows how people actually work. And as for my friendships, I haven't lost any but I know I was creeping them out before I explained what I was doing. Except, I explained it like "I am improving myself so that I can improve my outcome with women" and they liked that. I don't use routines in front of them because in the beginning I did and they heard it twice and were like "Oh your using routines ect blah" and I responded with "I was because I was having trouble thinking up things to say. I'm glad your helping out with the positive comments, thnx." then they shut up and help. Cept one girl I am going to have to sit down with but I will save that for my field report later. EvoJ

Author:	Arkitekt [ Mon Oct 08, 2007 9:22 pm ]
Post subject:
I agree about not getting consumed. There will come a time when this stuff becomes natural, that you stop playing games and start being human. I think that was the whole point of "The Game" The core principles, esp. what the dating gurus teach, have nothing to do with being an a**hole; abusing, or manipulating women. It's about growing, being more social, and being a man. It's when guys take this stuff too far or start abusing it is when you can be seen as negative. When being cocky/funny for instance; you can use waaay too much cocky and not enough funny and you end up sounding like a prick. Though my progress has been slow, I'm surprised at how well my friends accept any major changes I've made. That's why they are your friends. They accept you for who you are and who you will be. I wouldn't sever any ties. And make sure you aren't blaming them when it's your methods that may need adjusting.

Author:	arkmandluxe [ Tue Oct 09, 2007 12:48 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: I agree about not getting consumed. There will come a time when this stuff becomes natural, that you stop playing games and start being human. I think that was the whole point of "The Game" The core principles, esp. what the dating gurus teach, have nothing to do with being an a**hole; abusing, or manipulating women. It's about growing, being more social, and being a man. It's when guys take this stuff too far or start abusing it is when you can be seen as negative. When being cocky/funny for instance; you can use waaay too much cocky and not enough funny and you end up sounding like a prick. Though my progress has been slow, I'm surprised at how well my friends accept any major changes I've made. That's why they are your friends. They accept you for who you are and who you will be. I wouldn't sever any ties. And make sure you aren't blaming them when it's your methods that may need adjusting. HEY....get your own name.

Author:	Arkitekt [ Tue Oct 09, 2007 4:13 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: HEY....get your own name. If you really wish...the newbie shall abide. arkmandluxe, If it's still too close for ya, pm me and we'll straighten it out. To remain on topic: I think when you surround yourself with this stuff, as long as you go out into the real world and actually apply it, you've made the biggest step. One of the biggest steps I made was establishing my own personal sense of style. Dolphin, maybe you shouldn't be so secretive. It seems to me that when you try to deny or cover up what you are doing, you're not being honest with yourself. It can only hold you back. What would you say if a girl, or anyone for that matter, asks you if you've been using dating materials?

Author:	drm050067 [ Wed Oct 10, 2007 2:13 am ]
Post subject:	post reply
That's really great! I am happy for you man. However, as a PUA, try really hard not to break off what you were used too. And also try not to get too caught up. It is fantastic that you are finally discovering the "inner mack" or PUA. I have had a similar experience and things are sooooo much better once you awaken that side of yourself. It is like I am a whole new man. Just make sure you do not completly break off your old surroundings or else you may lose yourself Good luck!

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