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| deadly silence https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=43&t=3693 |
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| Author: | mazina [ Thu May 24, 2007 5:50 pm ] |
| Post subject: | deadly silence |
I'm from Finland, and here people are usually very silent, but even in here I'm almost a freak in terms of silence. I don't talk lot, and people get somehow unconfortable around me. (or maybe I smell bad but that's unlikely) I guess I'm not that ugly since few girls have come and talked to me, but I usually scare them away by bein too quiet. I mean do you have to talk a lot to be a PUA? Movies are full of silent strangers who pick up the HB10 of the city all the time, does that work in real life? Or do I just have to learn to talk a lot? |
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| Author: | Ekevu [ Thu May 24, 2007 7:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Yeah, you are going to have to learn some verbal skills buddy. Being too quite shows disinterest to the girl. I personally like asking the girl basic questions about her life (ie: age, location, job, hobbies, plans for the future, etc.). And just play the rest by ear. After a good conversation, you should be able to exchange phone numbers. |
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| Author: | Graffiti [ Thu May 24, 2007 10:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
well the question is, are you uncomfortable with the silence? If you're uncomfortable so are they. a good thing to do is have a good chat with them right away, then if you're naturally quiet they won't feel as awkward with it, they see you're not afraid to speak. The best thing to do would be to learn to be more social, it's as simple as taking your inner dialogue and changing it to outer, it can usually be a good conversation, unless it's you being uncomfortable, which would explain why they get freaked out with the quiet, your body language is screaming that you are uncomfortable. |
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| Author: | Difference [ Fri May 25, 2007 6:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
If you say that people get uncomfortable and that you scare some away with your freaky amount of silence, then I suggest you're gonna have to change something. Well, change isn't the right word. LEARN is more appropriate. Learning some social and verbal skills is something you'll need to do. When sarging, you are reciting routines. And the only way you can do a routine is by speaking. A way to get over your shyness and lack of speaking is, whenever you do anything around the place ie: buying food, catching a bus, waiting for a bus, ANYTHING, spark up a small conversation with some. When buying something from a shop, talk about anything, could be the weather, the product you're buying, the snail that recently crawled past, IT DOESN'T MATTER. This small talk will slowly get you used to talking to strangers, and get you feeling more comfortable and confident in general. Hope this helps mate. |
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