Having trouble being social in school compared to being out



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PostPosted: Fri Feb 03, 2017 8:05 pm 
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During my upbringing, i was one of those really shy, quiet, introverted type of kids. In the first few years of school, my mind was in the "I dont give a fuck about what everyone think" persona. So i was very social and "loud". Then somewhere during my middle school years, we developed and got more sophisticated. Started thinking about what other kids think of me. And that's where i really stuck to myself and started shifting towards the quiet, shy, introverted type of personality. And so for many years I was basically a complete loner. I had a small friend group, but they were congruent with my personality (quiet, shy, introverted).


I'm now a junior in high school and I've been in the self-development journey for 2 years now. For pick-up, I started taking action that were inconsistent for about 7 months. My social skills are definitely a lot better than before i started this journey. But for some reason, I still can't seem to join into big group talks during class. Where everybody contributes to what the teacher says, I just sit quietly. Scared of people laughing at me or thinking I'm that weird kid. And yes there are weird kids in my school. They speak out but we ignore or laugh at them because they're just so socially unaware of the way that they present themselves. Why is this? Outside of school I'm able to speak up and be whoever I want to be especially in friends group. But when it comes to school, my mind shuts down and i stop talking.


I'm afraid if I just start randomly talking out-loud, people would think of me as "Wait, wasn't he just that quiet kid?". I've had friends who were like that. They started acting out of their norms to be more social but end up being made fun of. Like i said, i can do this out side of school without any problems. Especially with girls. My male to female friend ratio is like 10:1.

The same goes for sets with more than 1 girls. I can't bring myself to approach 2+ sets. Single sets are fine.


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