PUA Forum :: Humiliation and Embarrassment

Hello Guys,

I would like to apologize for my English, as it's not my first language.
I don't know if this post releted to this forum, and maybe I should have write where I can get professional advice.

In these days, I'm dealing with terrible emotions. I had a very unpleasant experience that left me with Anxiety, Embarrassment and Humiliation. A very traumatic incident.
The most hurtful thing is that many people, I meane...many many people know about this Humiliation and Embarrassment that I'm afraid to leave my house and deal with thier whisperd and stares. I'm talking about a very serious embarrassment that I had in public. I feel shock everytime I remember it. sometimes I take Valium to calm down.

When I've read the game, I remember that Style met two spciel people. Steve P and Rasputin (Hypnitica) that really don't give a shit about what other people think about them and live in thier own reality. I must quote Rasputin:

"You don't shower
or shave for a month, until you smell like a sewer. Then you walk around
for two weeks wearing a dress and a goalie mask with a dildo strapped to
the front. That's what I did. And I will never be afraid of public humiliation
again."

Now, I dont even consider to do that but my point is that two people and some other Inner Game teachers and maybe even you guys can help me to deal with this thing. I really want to walk around all this people and don't give a shit about them but it just look impposible, I can't ignore it. I know they talking about what happend to me in from of so many people. How can I walk through them calm and apathetic to their gossips?

Author:	The Squirrel [ Wed Aug 21, 2013 8:58 pm ]
Post subject:	Humiliation and Embarrassment
Hello Guys, I would like to apologize for my English, as it's not my first language. I don't know if this post releted to this forum, and maybe I should have write where I can get professional advice. In these days, I'm dealing with terrible emotions. I had a very unpleasant experience that left me with Anxiety, Embarrassment and Humiliation. A very traumatic incident. The most hurtful thing is that many people, I meane...many many people know about this Humiliation and Embarrassment that I'm afraid to leave my house and deal with thier whisperd and stares. I'm talking about a very serious embarrassment that I had in public. I feel shock everytime I remember it. sometimes I take Valium to calm down. When I've read the game, I remember that Style met two spciel people. Steve P and Rasputin (Hypnitica) that really don't give a shit about what other people think about them and live in thier own reality. I must quote Rasputin: "You don't shower or shave for a month, until you smell like a sewer. Then you walk around for two weeks wearing a dress and a goalie mask with a dildo strapped to the front. That's what I did. And I will never be afraid of public humiliation again." Now, I dont even consider to do that but my point is that two people and some other Inner Game teachers and maybe even you guys can help me to deal with this thing. I really want to walk around all this people and don't give a shit about them but it just look impposible, I can't ignore it. I know they talking about what happend to me in from of so many people. How can I walk through them calm and apathetic to their gossips?

Author:	Artwork [ Thu Aug 22, 2013 1:04 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Humiliation and Embarrassment
I went through some shit like this in high school. The quickest most effective way to get through these situations is to surround yourself with new people. Do things like take dance classes, go to coffee shops, get a job in a different part of town, or anything that involves new people. Then if the old people are really that important you can return later with a new found confidence and possibly even a girl! Either way.. Staying still and doing nothing will get you nowhere.

Author:	fishnwomen [ Thu Aug 22, 2013 1:33 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Humiliation and Embarrassment
Surrounding yourself with new people isn't a bad idea, as mentioned above. But, I bet your problem is more of an internal one, you may have had an embarassing experience, but everyone does at some point in their life, the question is how you deal with it. Are you going to go out a fighter or are you going to take the emotional hit from society? Society can have a huge emotional impact on people, for example, in some cultures they celebrate the deaths of loved ones, they find it to be a joyous occasion. The day after a loved one dies, these people wake up, and continue living happily. To us, that sounds foreign, and even disrespectful to the dead. Similarly, if you have your pants pulled down in public, or if you piss your pants, our society dictates that you should feel embarassed, and ashamed, and because of that expectation, you do feel embarassed and ashamed. There's nothing preventing you from laughing at yourself other than your own mind, and your limiting beliefs. Think about it, are you all of a sudden a different person because of this event? Your mind will set you free.

Author:	wingintyme [ Thu Aug 22, 2013 2:12 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Humiliation and Embarrassment
tell us what you did son. did you go to the store, then the bank, then the post office, then the coffee shop, then work and then realize you forgot to put on clothes that day

Author:	The Squirrel [ Thu Aug 22, 2013 4:26 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Humiliation and Embarrassment
Quote: tell us what you did son. did you go to the store, then the bank, then the post office, then the coffee shop, then work and then realize you forgot to put on clothes that day I don't wnat to share it but it what you described is worse

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Author:	Jay (Majik) [ Thu Aug 22, 2013 6:36 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Humiliation and Embarrassment
Quote: Hello Guys, I would like to apologize for my English, as it's not my first language. I don't know if this post releted to this forum, and maybe I should have write where I can get professional advice. In these days, I'm dealing with terrible emotions. I had a very unpleasant experience that left me with Anxiety, Embarrassment and Humiliation. A very traumatic incident. The most hurtful thing is that many people, I meane...many many people know about this Humiliation and Embarrassment that I'm afraid to leave my house and deal with thier whisperd and stares. I'm talking about a very serious embarrassment that I had in public. I feel shock everytime I remember it. sometimes I take Valium to calm down. When I've read the game, I remember that Style met two spciel people. Steve P and Rasputin (Hypnitica) that really don't give a shit about what other people think about them and live in thier own reality. I must quote Rasputin: "You don't shower or shave for a month, until you smell like a sewer. Then you walk around for two weeks wearing a dress and a goalie mask with a dildo strapped to the front. That's what I did. And I will never be afraid of public humiliation again." Now, I dont even consider to do that but my point is that two people and some other Inner Game teachers and maybe even you guys can help me to deal with this thing. I really want to walk around all this people and don't give a shit about them but it just look impposible, I can't ignore it. I know they talking about what happend to me in from of so many people. How can I walk through them calm and apathetic to their gossips? Stop taking life so seriously. There are over 7 billion people on this planet. Why do you think you matter so much?

Author:	Eyrie [ Fri Aug 23, 2013 8:15 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Humiliation and Embarrassment
As a someone recovering from depersonalization and derealization I sympathise about the anxiety and embarrassment you are suffering from.... There is nothing I can post here that will remove your symptoms, your road to recovery will be a long tedious affair and your the only person that can do it. You have obviously decided to improve your current situation otherwise you won't be here so lets get down to the details. You had a bad experience and this bad experience was the trigger for you to descend into high levels of anxiety around people which I guess has now turned habitual. Your real issue isn't this "event" its the habitual anxiety which you have to contend with daily. Once you see your "terrible emotions" as just a bad habit it should make it easier to contend with, all you have to do is correct a bad habit.... Now back to that incident, I strongly urge you to post it on here as keeping this emotional trauma locked up inside you isn't doing you any favours. Draw a picture, write a poem about it, anything... expressing your feelings about it will noticeably help. There is hundreds upon hundreds of practices littered across the internet to help you deal with this anxiety so I'm not going to list them all , I would recommend developing the habit of self amusement mentioned above, throw in some meditation and exercise should defiantly help you out.

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