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Mixing eye contact and trite speech
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Author:  HearTheMusic [ Mon Nov 05, 2012 4:27 am ]
Post subject:  Mixing eye contact and trite speech

Do you look people in the eyes when conversing about day-to-day things? What about bullshitting with someone in a group setting? I find it hard to maintain eye contact. It happens when i've been speaking to an individual, asking questions for an extended period of time. Then, i expect them to return the favor as the conversation continues, so i'll hold contact at moments. During those moments, my clarity fades, and i'll sink into a pit of mindlessness. They'll look away, i feel they're uncomfortable and it makes me uncomfortable. Eventually i'll blurt something out ridiculous and things tend to get weird there. Any advice?

I try to keep the conversation not... well... going until something comes up that's fun to talk about. But i tend to stay so boggled up in my head that i take on what the conversation has become--boring. Am i asking too many questions? What mindsets work?

Author:  detox75 [ Mon Nov 05, 2012 4:58 pm ]
Post subject: 

Yes you have low status behavior which woman hate, or more accurately, find dismissible.

There was a good thread recently about holding eye contact and exercises to help with that. I would search for that. Good eye contact is essential for PUA, you wont get very far without it.

Author:  HearTheMusic [ Mon Nov 05, 2012 7:44 pm ]
Post subject: 

Why do i feel like putting on a show in the short-term won't help me DATE women? Rather, how was it decided that faking interest in a conversation would better the connection you build with someone else?

Author:  afcAL [ Sun Nov 18, 2012 1:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Mixing eye contact and trite speech

Quote:
Why do i feel like putting on a show in the short-term won't help me DATE women? Rather, how was it decided that faking interest in a conversation would better the connection you build with someone else?
Because you are right.

When it comes to the eye contact, do a little experiment. Record yourself (on video) telling a story. First time around, do it as you are talking with a real person. In a conversation. No biggie. Now record yourself telling the same story looking directly at the camera.
Play the two recordings back and look in your own eyes, as if a complete stranger.

This should drive the point home.

Al

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