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| day game anxiety/problem https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=43&t=136016 |
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| Author: | tay [ Wed May 16, 2012 3:00 am ] |
| Post subject: | day game anxiety/problem |
I started going to a local gym. I saw these two girls signing up right before me. I noticed one of them had my university's t-shirt, so when I was done with membership sign up, I went to work out. After a few minutes I went up to a girl and said something like "hey do you go there and there" and she was like "yes" looking a bit confused. I told her I go to the same university and she says the girl she's with is her roommate. We talk for a bit about basic stuff.. While were talking, in my head, I am starting to get really nervous and I started to talk little faster than I normally would, real non-confident on my part. I completely forget to keep direct eye contact, talk loud and clear, and worst of all I am not smiling as much as I should. As I was becoming more nervous and beginning to sense that my inner game is just destroying me from having fun with the conversation, I just said, looks like you girls are busy so am just gonna let you work out, and I left. I think one of the girls was kinda shy judging from her expressions, but regardless I messed up. I usually don't introduce myself until they ask for my name, but I've only approached girls during night time at parties, never during the day. I am not afraid of rejection, I am just afraid of talking to new people, especially attractive girls, and this scenario proved it that I need to work on my inner game. It's like I don't care if they don't find me attractive, but my problem lies from within me, not from the judgement of what they think about me. I know this is weird but I just can't get over come this, and it's severely limiting my day game abilities. I can make small conversations with other people, especially anyone that is not a girl of my age and I don't have much stress. Has anyone been in a similar situation and got out of it? I understand I have to just man up and talk to girls like normal people, but it's just not happening, I can't make myself do it. Sometimes I think about it before going to sleep, saying to myself, oh I will talk to a girl that I would like to get to know from class, gym, but guess what I puss out. What can I do? thanks for reading |
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| Author: | Jaypeg [ Wed May 16, 2012 12:28 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
I think you eloquently described exactly, what everyone goes through and is afraid to admit. That's exactly why everyone is here and most people have gotten into this. I am forced to talk to 50 - 100 university girls every day at work. It's amazing that once in a while, that HB10 comes up and it throws a hurdle at me and them bam, I feel myself slipping into AFC mode. There is that theory of observing ego which might help. The idea that you develope. Skill to step back from the conversation as it's happening and evaluate your progress and recalibrate. It takes lots of practice. |
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| Author: | ibhaZaa [ Mon May 21, 2012 11:49 am ] |
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what you posted is basically what everyone goes through. this is how you get better. the best master PUAs had this too, but they've done it so many times, that they got good at it. i recommend watching youtube videos on daygame, there are really good ones, and quite motivational. it is good to introduce yourself if you wanna go direct. this way your target will know that you are not just there for chit chatting. non verbal communication, including body language and tonality is more important that the actual words, scientifically proven. you just keep doing what you just did and you ll get really good. this is the only way to get better at doing anything. keep practicing. |
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| Author: | MadTown Mayhem [ Tue May 22, 2012 3:17 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
One can tell from your detailed description that you are thinking waaayyyy too much during the conversation with women. It's OK to be analytical afterwards, all the gurus are analytical, which is why they can write books about pick up & social dynamics. But the initial conversation should just be fun for you and the girls, and then guided towards an outcome (rapport, building sexual tension, etc.). You're also pre-supposing what the whole conversation and end result should be, as well who the women are. You don't really know them, but you're trying to unlock their psychological keys to turn them into sexual beasts, all within the first 30 seconds of conversation. In fact, you're trying desperately to do so. All they want to do is go to the gym, something they are already probably nervous about, and in the back of their minds they're hoping they'll meet a nice, funny guy they can have a good time with. Yes, a guy who has good game can get something more in that situation, but that's not what we're talking about here. You're also focusing on what YOUR feelings are during the conversation, which is never a good plan when talking to women. But the main problem is you're placing attractive women on a pedestal when they're really not much different than other women, just with better hair and bigger tits. You treat them differently because you want something from them that is different from what you want from unattractive women, and it is affecting your behavior and communication. Vin DiCarlo's The Attraction Code talks a lot about inner game in this sense, and I really like David Wygant's Master Series and No Excuses. TAC is more like reading a mystery novel that has been decoded, and Wygant's work functions more as a wake-up call. I recommend you locate these products and keep practicing. We've all been there at one time or another. |
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| Author: | tay [ Tue May 22, 2012 3:42 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
thanks for advice guys. I appreciate it. Is mater series and no excuses a video lesson or a book? |
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