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telling girls no. (standards and such)
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=9952		 Page 1 of 1
Author:  Vida [ Tue Oct 30, 2007 2:32 am ]
Post subject:  telling girls no. (standards and such)
Hey guys, I'm in a situation here. I've been studying PUA material for a while now and I'll say that it's affected the way that I interact with people though I haven't had anyone who knows anything about PUAs tell me so because I just don't know anyone (anyone in atlanta care to wing?...different subject, moving on). Anyway, this girl whom I've known for about seven years recently told me she really likes me and wants more. I however just dont want to give up all I've learned and settle down. PLUS, I want to keep her as a friend. The "lets just be friends" I feel just wont work.
On a similar subject, how would you guys let a girl down without ripping her apart?
Author:  horseradish [ Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:21 am ]
Post subject: 
why dont you just tell her you're not looking for a relationship right now. Perhaps you can still sleep with her. By telling her upfront this is your get out of jail free card.

that way, you are not an asshole, you stated your intentions upfront.
Author:  Charm333 [ Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:29 am ]
Post subject:  I had this exact same problem...
I had this problem a few weeks ago:
I knew this girl for a while and she had seen me cycle through a few GFs but it never really phased her. then one night when we were chilling she grabs my hand and squeezes so I'm think "whatever" and just go with it and when I walk her to her car she kisses me on lips and says "I love you" so now I don't know whats going on and i say "cool" a week later I invite her to a thai restaurant (her fav. food) and let her down easy and it worked like a charm. Here are a couple points that I can't stress enough
1. Go somewhere public where she won't make a scene if she is a crying/screeming type
2. be really nice and take all the blame say "I feel" alot
3. at the end say how much you love her AS A FRIEND and make it clear JUST AS A FRIEND
4. the lamest part: If you want her to stay your friend you have to wait a little bit before dating (a few weeks to a month should do it) Otherwise she might think you are just an ass hole and not talk to u again.
This was my expierience. hope it helped.
Author:  horseradish [ Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: I had this exact same problem...
Quote:
I had this problem a few weeks ago:
I knew this girl for a while and she had seen me cycle through a few GFs but it never really phased her. then one night when we were chilling she grabs my hand and squeezes so I'm think "whatever" and just go with it and when I walk her to her car she kisses me on lips and says "I love you" so now I don't know whats going on and i say "cool" a week later I invite her to a thai restaurant (her fav. food) and let her down easy and it worked like a charm. Here are a couple points that I can't stress enough
1. Go somewhere public where she won't make a scene if she is a crying/screeming type
2. be really nice and take all the blame say "I feel" alot
3. at the end say how much you love her AS A FRIEND and make it clear JUST AS A FRIEND
4. the lamest part: If you want her to stay your friend you have to wait a little bit before dating (a few weeks to a month should do it) Otherwise she might think you are just an ass hole and not talk to u again.
This was my expierience. hope it helped.

I guess this is OK but perhaps a little embarrasing for the girl. It really depends on the guy's intentions.

I think if you make it clear to her that whatever happens between you will not lead to a relationship this will benefit in 2 ways:

1. because it is not specifically a relationship with her you are avoiding but a relationship with anyone it will save her some pride.

2. You might still be able to sleep with her if you want to.

3. You were honest in your intentions and trying to save her from a relatinship you are not ready for.
Author:  Vida [ Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks guys, I think I'll be using the "I'm not looking for a relationship right now" thing. I think this will let me meet and mess around with other girls and I wont have to hide it from her. Would you say that's right?
Author:  Raykast [ Tue Oct 30, 2007 6:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
Pretty much. The thing that women hate is being lead on and disappointed by guys. Many times guys will do this in a AFC way like saying "i love you" and how much they "care about" them just to get in the pants and then they realize they have a relationship when it really wasn't what they were looking for, then it just a matter of time before it all goes bad. Often times women will just do it to themselves to by reading into anything a guy does as a sign of relationship. I've had that happen to me.

Sometime I think it's almost better to come off like a little bit of a player from the get go. You don't hide it, even from your female friends. It keeps your value up, and makes you a catch, and there is really now way in hell they can be lead into thinking your going to commit to them unless you deliberately communicate that to them.

Okay, I went on a tangent....
Author:  L.A. Tripp [ Tue Oct 30, 2007 8:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
Are you saying you JUST want to be friends with this girl OR friends with benefits with this girl?
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