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| Reasons to drop the girl completely? https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=99076 |
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| Author: | DJ_Z [ Wed Aug 17, 2011 5:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Reasons to drop the girl completely? |
Hey guys, once again I'm taking my previous experience to make a little hypothetical. Last night I went to the bar with a couple buddies, and had a great time. I actually found out a girl that graduated from high school with me works there now, and I stuck around for a little while to catch up with her at the end of the night. Unfortunately, in the conversation I found out that she does have a boyfriend, and that makes her persona non nookie to me. Now, a few years ago I may have just been done with her right there. What's the point of chillin with a girl I have no intention of sleeping with was my mindset. Nowadays, though, I realize that's completely ridiculous. First off, she's a bartender, free drinks, anyone? Second, I think I now recognize the value of female friends whether for legit friendship or even just pivots and preselection. Unfortunately, the only other girl there I talked to was my buddy's ex. Wow, gotta find a new bar. My question coming from that little experience, is do you, studying PUA, think that female friendship is possible? Does it always lead to sexual tension and complications from someone? Is it only worth having female friends for preselection? Aaaaand GO! |
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| Author: | Tasty [ Wed Aug 17, 2011 5:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
You're mindset is how mine used to be, and is counter-productive. Only wanting to talk to girls and befriend them in order to sleep with them is outcome dependent, and is not good for your game at all. The girl can typically feel this vibe coming off of you, where you are seeking value and less likely to be giving value. I would talk to a cute girl, find out she has a BF, then just give up and not really care about her. It's best to befriend EVERYONE. Married women, girls with boyfriends, girls with no boyfriends, guys, guys with girlfriends, guys with wives. This way you are that fun social guy who just knows everyone. Also, when a girl sees that you genuinely want to get to know her and enjoy talking to her, even though she has a serious boyfriend, other girls can feel that you don't care about the outcome. You're just a cool social dude, which is pure value. On a side note.. it's fun to flirt with girls with boyfriends. Many of them enjoy it, and its just harmless flirting. You are pumping eachother's egos up and making eachother feel good, and attracted. Nothing wrong with that. I do this all the time, and the tension is a little different than with single girls. Now when you start getting her number to hangout and feeling up on her is another story. But when should you drop the girl completely? When she has no personality, you find her boring, there is absolutely no vibing going on between you two. As far as seuxally, I'll stop pursuing the girl when I realize i'm no longer attracted to her physically at all. This happens with FB's sometimes. |
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| Author: | here2play [ Wed Aug 17, 2011 7:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Friends are always good and always have tremendous value. If a gal is attractive you are going to have some tension and some desire - big deal. There is a time and place for everything and if it is not an appropriate circumstance to try to score a piece so be it, you'll both survive. Here is the thing to consider and this is what I wish someone had filled me in when I was young. Attractive, young women always have an SO of some form or another. They are never completely free and single. But their involvements are typically temporary. The typical mating behavior of human females is serial monogamy. they screw one person for awhile then try to trade up. The typical algorythm is involvement with one person, then they start to get bored and start to check out the rest of the market. When one comes along that catches her eye in particular she will flirt and feel him out a little and if he seems like he is a step up from her current guy she will try him on for size and then tell the BF that she thinks they need a "break" and during that time she will have a hot and heavy encounter or two with him and see if he is a suitable step up or not. If he is, she will dump the BF and if he isn't they will get back together untill the next one comes along and then the process will repeat itself. The moral to this story is always be on your game and always be flirty and engaging and always be gaming even if someone has a BF and even if she isn't on the market today because the chances are she will be on the market again soon even if her BF isn't aware of it. As long as you maintain your masculinity and your sexuality and don't friendzone yourself and turn into her boybitch, you are in the game and stand a chance. |
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| Author: | The Designer [ Thu Aug 18, 2011 3:56 pm ] |
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here2play and taSty both have great advice. One of my biggest flaws as an AFC was not projecting myself as a sexual creature. Flirting only happened with girls I really liked. Sex talk was kept to a minimal to avoid "offending" a girl and sounding like a pervert. After reading PUA material, I started being a LOT more open about sex and flirtation with single AND attached women. Why? Sometimes just for fun. She's "safe" therefore there's no real risk. Unavailable women have friends. If they size you up for themselves and think you're great, they are much more likely to set you up with one of their friends. Women may not always be attached. This is what I call a "long term investment". A lot of PUAs are shortsighted into thinking about how their actions can gain them immediate results. A great PUA is constantly setting up potential. If you stay friends with this bartender, you can flirt. You have free drinks or at least a lower tab. You gain higher status by knowing the bartender...the hot female bartender. You have an excuse to talk to random women who approach the bartender while you're hanging out. And if the bartender breaks up with her man, you're available for fun. |
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| Author: | skills360 [ Fri Aug 19, 2011 5:09 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
yes, almost all of my friends are females, the problem will come when they get a serious boyfriend, the friendship tend to weaken, usually because the boyfriends become jealous of the friendship. Once you had a lot of female friends and get really good at pua, you will start internalizing and thinking like a woman, hahhaa lol! i know is crazy, but that is how it is, that happened to Jeff Allen form Rsd too, and too a lot of puas. |
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| Author: | vicparkguy83 [ Sat Aug 20, 2011 4:07 am ] |
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Quote: yes, almost all of my friends are females, the problem will come when they get a serious boyfriend, the friendship tend to weaken, usually because the boyfriends become jealous of the friendship. Once you had a lot of female friends and get really good at pua, you will start internalizing and thinking like a woman, hahhaa lol! i know is crazy, but that is how it is, that happened to Jeff Allen form Rsd too, and too a lot of puas.
Haha I got the same problem, I got too many female friends (either just friends or fuck-buddies) and not enough male friends. I think overdosing on female company might actually weaken your game.
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| Author: | ProfessorX [ Sat Aug 20, 2011 6:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
If you have a little sexual tension built up you want to stay in the picture so you'll be top of her speed dial when that asshole boyfriend breaks her heart! |
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| Author: | skills360 [ Sat Aug 20, 2011 6:55 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Quote: yes, almost all of my friends are females, the problem will come when they get a serious boyfriend, the friendship tend to weaken, usually because the boyfriends become jealous of the friendship. Once you had a lot of female friends and get really good at pua, you will start internalizing and thinking like a woman, hahhaa lol! i know is crazy, but that is how it is, that happened to Jeff Allen form Rsd too, and too a lot of puas.
Haha I got the same problem, I got too many female friends (either just friends or fuck-buddies) and not enough male friends. I think overdosing on female company might actually weaken your game.ah? why would it weaken your game, the opposite.. |
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| Author: | vicparkguy83 [ Mon Aug 22, 2011 11:03 am ] |
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Quote: ah? why would it weaken your game, the opposite..
Well right now in my life I spend about 80% of my time talking to females, and often I just get sick of it, I need to have blokey conversations sometimes or I'll go mad. Therefore weakening my game.
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| Author: | short [ Tue Aug 23, 2011 6:57 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
wow i never thought about it but about 75% of my friendds are female and i only fool around with mabey 25% of em. there great for jealousy and building value in the clubs. when i meet a new girl and goto the club with em' they often comment about how many people come up and hug or kiss me(on the cheek usually) |
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| Author: | T.Clean [ Mon Aug 29, 2011 4:15 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Highly agree with your thoughts. In fact I caught myself doing it again on the weekend. I enjoy female company, even if it's not sexual. It eases the mood of the night makes you feel better about yourself and the works. I literally last night went clubbing with a female friend of mine who I have very little interest in (not none but it's nothing major). I recently found myself rather attached to another girl and am forever grateful for how it allows you open your eyes just a little wider. The amount of time I have spent with a girl or been hit on by a girl has minimally doubled since maintaining a female friend with me. (Sadly enough I turned everyone of them this weekend down, the unfortunate side of a relationship) I often prefer spending time with a female over a male simply because once a pair of boobs walks in the room 90% of males will have a major personality overhaul. Females I have noticed do this very rarely and that I find more comforting being around someone who is more in tune with themselves. (Not a stab other males but I'm really saying that a lot of guys out there are not happy with who they are and fake an appearance) It took me a long time to work out the difference between what I wanted and what I wanted at that moment. Finding that balance is breathtaking and eases a lot of weight of your back. |
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