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I literally can't attract women
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Author:  slyder2412 [ Fri Sep 12, 2008 6:00 pm ]
Post subject:  I literally can't attract women
Hey what's up guys? I know i'm good looking enough to do so, i know i have the physique to do so, but yet i can't seem to attract any of the women i want to attract, or MOST in general, even some low HB's which i would think would be cake.

I have alpha body language....not 100% eye contact, but maybe 70-80% eye contact....good conversational skills (i think).

When i say good conversational skills...i mean that i can branch out from things said, into stories, or into tangents, "oh that reminds me of blah blah"...i can keep a conversation going w/o ever getting into typical questions.

Lately i've been told by a few girls that i speak "so professional, very mature, like a psychologist" with the questions i ask. And i'm sure they are right, and in all honesty i like that. Why not take what someone says and try and redefine it and see if it applies to other areas of life, what made them decide on that emotion for that situation, if they want to change it, or if they are content, etc?

I am really clueless as to why i can't attract women where they are kinoing me, giving me dog bowl eyes, really trying to hang out with me, talk more. I'll even to compliance tests like break rapport in the middle of a good conversation and see if they will re-iniate, most don't. They don't WALK away, but kinda just stand there...but no where's near the desired response of "yeah....so as we were talking about...."

I kino...not A LOT really to more sensitive areas b/c i try to calibrate i guess and i don't "feel" the rapport really increases too much. It's usually me doing the talking, asking the questions. I don't entirely shine the spotlight on them by non stop questions, i'll tell shit about myself/stories also.

I am completely LOST.....i hope someone can help me out b/c although i won't say "this sucks" b/c i won't put all my worth as a person on getting women, i have too much confidence now a days to do that again. I'm not sure what i'm doing wrong though....thanks for reading.
Author:  Chino Kapone [ Fri Sep 12, 2008 7:08 pm ]
Post subject: 
I hear you talking, but that seems thats all you are doing. Are you taking the chance to put yourself out there and close? Have you attempted to close? #, K,F?
Author:  frekinrican [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 1:05 am ]
Post subject: 
^^ I agree it also sounds like your not catching their attraction spikes or even building enough comfort. Think about it.. if you liked a girl your attracted too but shes being alpha female while your trying your damn hardest to show you like her but you give up- same situation. Also I think you got the attraction but when you try to calibrate to comfort your iether doing it too early or not enough.. my advice.
Author:  slyder2412 [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 2:47 am ]
Post subject: 
Hey guys thanks for your responses. I do believe that esculation and a more effective closing will propel my game forward.

How best do i esculate? Of course kino, but sometimes given that i sit down at a girl at a table in the cafeteria, i can't really "casually"be touching her....so what else can i do? What techniques/things do you guys do that has proven to be most effective? thanks.
Author:  dieselfuel [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 4:41 am ]
Post subject: 
Gambler released a vid about kino recently. He was doing a lecture in Germany. He calls is "Boob and Pussy Kino," Its really good stuff. I had the opportunity to field test it today. I think I'll write a Field report abut it now.
Author:  SKY007 [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 10:44 am ]
Post subject: 
could be a lot of things
- maybe you ask too many questions... you should use more statements (dont say "where are you from", but say "i think you are from xxx")
- maybe you are not in a frame of qualifying her, but in a frame that you have to qualify yourself to her (acting try-hard by using routines etc and becoming her entertainment clown that is trying for her to like him) (i think this is the one)
- maybe you lean in or dont act calm enough (or other bad body language)
- maybe your voice is bad (too high)
- maybe you look too friendly (too interested), or maybe you even look too negative towards them.
Author:  SKY007 [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 10:46 am ]
Post subject: 
btw kino helps a lot, but you can also attract them without kino... kino is not the cure-all or something. (and kino can also work against you if you mis-calibrate and go in too early)
Author:  Bonita [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 7:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
I understand what you are talking aabout when you say you speak in a mature (almost psychologist) way. And that to me seems the key element to focus in on. There are women that do like to have deep conversations, but the initial conversations should more light-hearted and a sexual/flirtacious rapport breaker should be added. That will take you out of the LJBF zone. Even if you aren't engaged in deep conversation, just the tone itself can convey a mature attitude. Women don't want to think they are talking to their dad when they are having a convo, and if you come across too mature, that is what they will think because you will remind them of their dad (ehhh creepy!) haha...good luck! Hope everything works out :)
Author:  bradjackson [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 9:30 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'm going to play Dr Phil here and turn this around on you.

From the story you just told, it's not that "you can't attract women"
If they are giving you kino, attention, doggie dinner bowl eyes, standing there hanging out with you...all your words....then it's not that you can't attract them, YOU JUST CAN'T CLOSE THEM.

HUGE DIFFERENCE

Also, you said you break rapport to do a compliance test. I know you may have read something like that somewhere but it's a stupid idea to ever break rapport. Do a compliance test if you DON'T have rapport.

Rapport's the most important thing there is...never break it. It's like saying I'm going to dump the gas out of my car while I'm cruising down the highway and hope I coast to a gas station.

It sounds like you have trouble ESCALATING. Take the interaction somwhere more seductive. You enter the Friend/Advisor zone with all your "professional questions."

I don't know enough about you or your situation to give you real advice, but I can tell you it's not that you can't attract them. It's that you aren't escalating and closing.
Author:  slyder2412 [ Sat Sep 13, 2008 11:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
Guys i really appreciate the advice and escalating is definitely the issue, i guess i have to do more kino....and more be sexual overall, flirt and shit. I'm so caught up in having a "quality" conversation that i guess i forget the primary reason of why i'm talking to her to begin with. Also i think getting the number close at the RIGHT time is important, after an instant of good rapport has passed, instead of at the end of the interaction like i've been doing.

What are some good escalating topics of conversation would you guys say?
Author:  Bonita [ Sun Sep 14, 2008 11:51 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Rapport's the most important thing there is...never break it.

On the contrary bradjackson, basically any PUA will tell you that a rapport break is key to attraction. Rapport break does not mean leave them and go talk to someone else. It does not mean awkward silence or diss them completely. A rapport break is, after good rapport is established, you say something sexual or very flirtacious to throw them off. It should be a little uncomfortable, and slightly forward. When you have good rapport, it is common to see that person as a friend. The goal of a rapport break is to make them see you as more than just a friend. They trust you already, and then you add in that element of sexual attraction. Some people can sexually attract by their looks alone, and others are very flirtacious from the start. But if you go indirect, you need to break that "friendly" chit-chat (i.e. rapport break)
Author:  Ezo [ Mon Sep 15, 2008 12:08 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
basically any PUA will tell you that a rapport break is key to attraction
So on the spot!

Thats also known as push-pull... Very effective, a woman will think of you more if she feels that she is losing you.
Author:  kasabi [ Mon Sep 15, 2008 1:31 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
A rapport break is, after good rapport is established, you say something sexual or very flirtacious to throw them off. It should be a little uncomfortable, and slightly forward.
Slyder,

This right here is the ace in your deck!

Thus far, you seemed to have rolled right into your comfort zone. This is a good thing as many have trouble even getting this far. I love the "under the radar" approach but Bonita is 100% right. Now you have to force yourself to unchartered territory. In fact, if you haven't done this much, it will be more than just a "little uncomfortable" but you gotta take those punches if you want reward.

Also . . . I don't know what the PUA's would call this but I've tried it with some great results. Basically, I begin with the upper cut followed by jabs instead of the other way around. Although I've never crashed with it, I guess it's possible . . . Just know that when you make it past the open, well, you'll be comfortable with further escalation . . .

Start off with a sexually charged opener . . . then just bridge into rapport.

Maybe:

"Woh, that's a hot dress . . . You're making me think naughty thoughts."(Eyes, hands . . . I mean really work it) Don't give her time to say anything(usually they blank for a few) and bridge right into a routine or neg that engages her. . . I mean, this can be a totally different topic.

2 minutes . . . 5 minutes . . . Yeah, she's still thinking about the naughty thoughts comment. But now, you've shown her through regular conversation that you're not some crazy stalker. Now don't even mention your "naughty thoughts". Just bring up the "dress" topic. Just bring up the "body" topic. She knows what you're thinking and will reward you with IOI's which makes escalating that much easier.

A little variation for fun . . .
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