Did the subject title seem confusing? Good, because it got you here.
Its not, however, just a ploy to attract you to this thread; its actually an accurate description of how I carry myself around women. Let me explain.
I don't have any set lines, routines or whatever when I approach an attractive girl. But I always have the same motive and objective.
The motive: I want to have a friendly conversation with a stranger today.
The objective: I want to find out something about this girl.
Both my motive and objective are simple. Mainly because they are easy to reinforce in my head whenever I prepare to go up and start talking to a girl. And they also simplify pick up to its most basic level: two strangers forming a connection.
My motive stems from my aim in life to quite simply be a good person. A person that people, both guys and girls, want to be around. A person that strangers want to meet and become acquainted with. This carries over into improved lifestyle, improved friendships, improved career, etc. The bottom line is that if you're a closed off person to other people, you won't enjoy the best that they can offer. This is same whether its sex, friendship, etc.
Now onto my objective; "I want to find out something about this girl". This is obviously more specific to pick and the girl in question. But again its about being an open person, interested in others. When I say I want to find something out about the girl, it could be as simple as her name, what she's doing in this area, what her hobbies are. Note: its never whats her number or how I can sleep with her. Thats too specific an aim and creates unnecessary pressure on yourself. Instead numbers and sex should be your overall motive for picking up girls, but for each one simplify the situation.
For example, the other day I was waiting for a bus at the stop and there's a cute girl next to me. Nobody's talking; everyone's on their phone (as you would expect in the wonderfully sociable 21st century). The bus doesn't arrive for another 10 minutes.... I have no battery on my own phone.... fuck it lets say hi. I notice she's wearing a Blink-182 t-shirt. Thank the gods; they're one of my favourite bands. I open with "excuse me (I'm British... deal with it), thats a really cool t-shirt. Where did you get it from?" She responds by saying how she went to see them live and got it at the gig. Awesome. We talk until the bus comes about the band and what music we like. We finish by exchanging numbers and agreeing to check out an indie CD shop nearby (we live close: extra awesome). I'm seeing her next week.
Despite the conversation being a relative success in terms of pick up 'aims', I completely achieved my own objective; that of finding out something about her. In this case, where she got that t-shirt.
I'm not claiming that my philosophy will get you laid 8 times in a week or anything like that. But sometimes pick-up can be extremely confusing or daunting, especially to a newcomer. So I thought I'd share my thoughts and philosophy on the matter. Hope it helps at least one person.
Constructive criticism welcome
. Peace brothers x
yeah yeah I know) and a playful bump. Something. I understand your technique and it's good to overcome approach anxiety. But you are missing qualities that will get you into that potential lover territory.