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Social life advice...
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Author:  Ka [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 2:46 am ]
Post subject:  Social life advice...
Well guys, im posting here tonight to help keep other people from making the same mistakes as me.

I didnt realize the importance of this until tonight and id like to share what i have learned.

It is EXTREMELY important, that you are not always available to go out with a target! I have been gaming a girl and so far the 3 times she has called me to "hang out" i havent been upto anything, at least not important enough to keep me from going out.

Huge mistake. I got burnt tonight im pretty sure of it. I got invited to go out with her tonight to a club. After getting ready and waiting a few mins past when she said shed pick me up, i got a text saying she wasnt going.

She didnt pickup when i called to find out why, but we texted back and fourth.

Its very important to plan your weekends ahead. Have something socail planned at least as a fall back. For some people this is just common sence but for people like be rebuilding thier socail lives its hard to do.

And as tempting as it might be to accept an invite out, sometimes your better off turning it down and going out another time.

Well i made alternative plans, not nearly as exciting, so im on my way out. Hope this helps.
Author:  Alphagame [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 4:40 am ]
Post subject: 
I have a rule I manufactured a few months ago for myself and that is I'll NEVER meet a woman out with her friends at a place of her choosing EVER again. At least not until I've fucked her real good several times.

Several reasons for this:

First, women want to be led by their man. They don't want to lead them, but they don't realize this. If you meet her at a time and place of her choosing, she'll instinctively be turned off by it. It's a DLV.

If she suggests a place and time to meet up, I think you have three options: 1.) Tell her you can't make it because you have something better going on 2.) Agree but then cancel at the last minute or just stand her up and see if she re-initiates communication or 3.) Agree but then call her 5 minutes beforehand and tell her you're at another place and see if she chases.

The MAJOR reason I'll NEVER meet a woman out at a place and time of her choosing is because there is like a 1,000% chance that she'll be with at least one friend and possibly several. The odds of her showing up alone to meet you are non-existent. She will be with friends. Several problems with this. If just one of her friends finds a fault with you, you're dead. Her friends are obstacles. The odds of her flirting with other men and ignoring you while running you through the jealousy shit-test are tremendous. I failed the last jealously shit-test I was dealt and just want to avoid these at all costs. There may be a good way to win them, but I don't want more experience with this shit. As far as I'm concerned, if a woman wants to play that kind of game, see-you-later bitch...too many woman want me...I don't have to put up with it.
Author:  PrettyBoy41 [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 7:47 am ]
Post subject: 
ya man, one of the biggest unattractive qualities you can demonstrate to a woman is over-availablity.
Author:  Ka [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:23 am ]
Post subject: 
Yea just to elaborate, now that im back home and still stewing over this thing. The first 2 times i meet with her on her terms were at her house without other friends. This time around her and some girl friends were going out.

I know for a fact i got stood up and lied to about it because she lives on the coner, on my way out i had to pass her house, and no one was home.

Id have been fine if she just told me its girls only or she even lied and said she couldnt get me in...fine. She told me her sister was sick and she had to stay home and take care of her.

I agree completely with both of you guys, but specificlly with Alphagame. For the first few dates control the location and the social circle that goes.

Secondly, keep active. Plan ahead even if its extremely tentative.

Im feeling really low right now and im trying to help you guys avoid this. Now ima go cut myself with saftey scissors and pass out...g'night.
Author:  underdwg [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 8:55 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Its very important to plan your weekends ahead. Have something socail planned at least as a fall back. For some people this is just common sence but for people like be rebuilding thier socail lives its hard to do.
No offense man, but maybe you were HER fallback ... and what she really wanted to do came through. It IS messed up that she lied about if she went out or not (if she did). Shit like that happens all the time, but no matter what it's pretty uncalled for. I have had to deal with girls like that before and it wasn't until I brushed them off and became "unavailable" to go out for a little bit that they could value the times when we did go out together. Personally I wouldn't make a big deal of trying to plan big fun nights with her just call her and invite her in on little shit during the week. ("i.e. come over toke a rip, help me find some new clothes at the mall, etc etc..) Also try not to plan nights with potentials on Fri or Sats just because of the fact that her friends will want to go out and she will almost always pick them over you until you become a bigger part of her life or feel you are acceptable to "showoff" to her friends.
Author:  Ka [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:58 am ]
Post subject: 
No offense taken man, it would take alot to upset me. I agree in a way.

As for her intentions i coulda been a fall back. Whatever the reason isnt important.

My point about planning your social events and whatnot ahead of time isnt directed to the target, and im not talking about fall back plans.

Setup time with the most reliable friends/gf's you have for your most vaulble times. For people you have just meet to get those times with you they should either be willing to meet up with you (if you invite them), or prove to you during less valuble time that they wont flake out on you.

What im talking about is planning your social life at least a week in advance. This way you are not readily available to your target whenever they chose. You will DHV yourself by doing this and avoid yourself from being put in a situation like i was tonight that severly damages your inner game and frame.

I was upset at this girl for most of the night, but the person whom i should be upset at mostly is myself. I let this get this way by not directing my social life and interactions better. Granted im in a rebuilding phase where not all of my time is utilized, however even nights where i plan on doing nothing, i should be able and willing to turn down an invite from a target just to show them im not gonna spend time with them whenever.

Hope this helps guys.
Author:  3 hands [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 12:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
A small tip I got from David D and have been using for some time is to just plan your entire agenda full, and if a girl calls with something just say, Hmm I was going to the local barn dance tonight with some friends but I can do taht every night, lets hear what you've got. Or hey XXX I was going to the local barn dance tonight You can come over and have some fun here instead. Or Nah sorry can't come I'm going to the local barn dance tonight.

If she knows you hang with other females this is even better :P As she will know your going to see them at the event. It will give her that jealousy complex (girls do this ALL THE TIME!)

Anyway it's not that important that you go to the event you have planned it is important to have it planned with the maybe I'll go attitude.
Author:  Ka [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 12:46 pm ]
Post subject: 
Well put 3 hands...this is the short version of what i was getting at.

Your plans dont have to be solid and definative, just have something to do...if you want include your target, if not exclude her...just dont be available everytime.
Author:  Roller [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 6:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
You had something more important to do than meet her anyway. Right?
Let her know that it's no big thing and you've already forgot about it.

If you ever do meet her friends... make it your job to impress the heck out of them.
Author:  Virgil07 [ Sat Jan 05, 2008 7:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
Wow I never anything about this. So the point is, don't be TOO available right?

No wonder i used to get BS excuses for girls not going to a particular place with me.
Author:  Ka [ Sun Jan 06, 2008 12:15 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
You had something more important to do than meet her anyway. Right?
Let her know that it's no big thing and you've already forgot about it.

If you ever do meet her friends... make it your job to impress the heck out of them.
No, my point is i should have had something better to do, she didnt earn the right to fit into my "prime time slot" and even if i didnt have anyhting to do i should have acted like i did.

Part of our problem is that we act hard to get at first and end up dropping that defense way before the girl does. She sees that she can have what she wants (you) now, and becomes disintrested.

Not only is it healthier to actively plan out your social life/outtings, but this will help fill your time and allow you to naturally not have all the time in the world for a target.
Author:  underdwg [ Sun Jan 06, 2008 2:30 am ]
Post subject: 
Lately, I as well have fallen into the "too available" category, but am working to improve that. Part of that is the fact my license was taken away and no vehicle to drive SPAM ... however that will change shortly when I get my license back and go to the dealership to pickup the Escalade EXT I've been salivating over. (If that doesn't DHV me I don't know what will haha). But yeah also another important tip is if a girl calls and you aren't doing anything but bumming around the house. When they ask what you are doing, don't say "uh, just chillin", or "nothing".. Say "oh I just got in from blah blah blah" or "getting ready to go blah blah".. Even if you didn't or aren't prepare something ahead of time b4 you hit ANSWER on your phone!
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