PUA Forum :: Making her chase you?

Some guys like to "flip the script" by trying to make the girl chase them instead of showing direct interest. It might sound good in theory, but what's going to happen when you actually try to get together with a girl who's chasing you like mad? I'll tell you what: she's going to lose interest because she's "caught" you and you're no longer a challenge.

How many times have you had a girl absolutely crushing over you, only to make a complete 180 degree turn as soon as you decide to reciprocate some interest? One moment you're stringing her along with cocky lines and feigned disinterest and she's hounding you with delicious attention and affection. The next moment you think "She's showing interest in me! I can now safely ask her out with no chance of getting my feelings hurt from rejection!" So you show some interest back and you ask her out. And she says "no" because now you've taken away the thrill of the chase.

Why do so many guys try to adapt this style of seduction into their game? Well, it sure as hell feeds your ego even if you aren't actually getting anything out of it.

When it comes to the world of dating and seduction, more often than not you're going to have to make a choice between your ego and actual success. Think about what guys normally do to boost their own egos, and how those actions affect the women they're involved with. John goes around bragging about how he fucked Jane in the club bathroom last night; Jane feels betrayed, people end up calling her a slut, and other girls now know better than to do any dirty things with John! One of the biggest reasons I ask girls to keep everything between me and them a secret just between me and them is that the smarter girls know that they have to keep their reputations in check.

We all want to feel wanted and there's no denying that. The fact of the matter is that some of us start using pickup techniques in hopes of just getting more attention from women regardless of other potential benefits like sex, romance, companionship, etc. In the end, though, would any of us be satisfied with just getting attention? If you get girls chasing you all the time, there's no doubt that you'll be disappointed when they run the other way as soon as you make yourself available to them. Spare yourself the pointless high school mind games and play the real game. There's absolutely nothing wrong with taking the classically masculine role of being aggressive and chasing after what (who) you want. You might think that trying to make a girl chase you is a neat way to avoid that nasty "rejection" thing, but think again. The more you try to avoid risk, the less reward you'll get. Risks are opportunities.

Author:	Chief [ Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:01 pm ]
Post subject:	Making her chase you?
Some guys like to "flip the script" by trying to make the girl chase them instead of showing direct interest. It might sound good in theory, but what's going to happen when you actually try to get together with a girl who's chasing you like mad? I'll tell you what: she's going to lose interest because she's "caught" you and you're no longer a challenge. How many times have you had a girl absolutely crushing over you, only to make a complete 180 degree turn as soon as you decide to reciprocate some interest? One moment you're stringing her along with cocky lines and feigned disinterest and she's hounding you with delicious attention and affection. The next moment you think "She's showing interest in me! I can now safely ask her out with no chance of getting my feelings hurt from rejection!" So you show some interest back and you ask her out. And she says "no" because now you've taken away the thrill of the chase. Why do so many guys try to adapt this style of seduction into their game? Well, it sure as hell feeds your ego even if you aren't actually getting anything out of it. When it comes to the world of dating and seduction, more often than not you're going to have to make a choice between your ego and actual success. Think about what guys normally do to boost their own egos, and how those actions affect the women they're involved with. John goes around bragging about how he fucked Jane in the club bathroom last night; Jane feels betrayed, people end up calling her a slut, and other girls now know better than to do any dirty things with John! One of the biggest reasons I ask girls to keep everything between me and them a secret just between me and them is that the smarter girls know that they have to keep their reputations in check. We all want to feel wanted and there's no denying that. The fact of the matter is that some of us start using pickup techniques in hopes of just getting more attention from women regardless of other potential benefits like sex, romance, companionship, etc. In the end, though, would any of us be satisfied with just getting attention? If you get girls chasing you all the time, there's no doubt that you'll be disappointed when they run the other way as soon as you make yourself available to them. Spare yourself the pointless high school mind games and play the real game. There's absolutely nothing wrong with taking the classically masculine role of being aggressive and chasing after what (who) you want. You might think that trying to make a girl chase you is a neat way to avoid that nasty "rejection" thing, but think again. The more you try to avoid risk, the less reward you'll get. Risks are opportunities.

Author:	Ilium [ Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:45 pm ]
Post subject:
Chief, this post if amazing and I agree with it whole heartily.

Author:	smokeit [ Tue Mar 20, 2012 8:56 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Making her chase you?
Quote: Some guys like to "flip the script" by trying to make the girl chase them instead of showing direct interest. It might sound good in theory, but what's going to happen when you actually try to get together with a girl who's chasing you like mad? I'll tell you what: she's going to lose interest because she's "caught" you and you're no longer a challenge. How many times have you had a girl absolutely crushing over you, only to make a complete 180 degree turn as soon as you decide to reciprocate some interest? One moment you're stringing her along with cocky lines and feigned disinterest and she's hounding you with delicious attention and affection. The next moment you think "She's showing interest in me! I can now safely ask her out with no chance of getting my feelings hurt from rejection!" So you show some interest back and you ask her out. And she says "no" because now you've taken away the thrill of the chase. Why do so many guys try to adapt this style of seduction into their game? Well, it sure as hell feeds your ego even if you aren't actually getting anything out of it. When it comes to the world of dating and seduction, more often than not you're going to have to make a choice between your ego and actual success. Think about what guys normally do to boost their own egos, and how those actions affect the women they're involved with. John goes around bragging about how he fucked Jane in the club bathroom last night; Jane feels betrayed, people end up calling her a slut, and other girls now know better than to do any dirty things with John! One of the biggest reasons I ask girls to keep everything between me and them a secret just between me and them is that the smarter girls know that they have to keep their reputations in check. We all want to feel wanted and there's no denying that. The fact of the matter is that some of us start using pickup techniques in hopes of just getting more attention from women regardless of other potential benefits like sex, romance, companionship, etc. In the end, though, would any of us be satisfied with just getting attention? If you get girls chasing you all the time, there's no doubt that you'll be disappointed when they run the other way as soon as you make yourself available to them. Spare yourself the pointless high school mind games and play the real game. There's absolutely nothing wrong with taking the classically masculine role of being aggressive and chasing after what (who) you want. You might think that trying to make a girl chase you is a neat way to avoid that nasty "rejection" thing, but think again. The more you try to avoid risk, the less reward you'll get. Risks are opportunities. That's why you should mix risk, with attraction. You can do AFC BEHAVIOR, and still F - Close as long a you are ALPHA and the hb know's you are ALPHA.

Author:	Cornishman [ Tue Mar 20, 2012 11:44 pm ]
Post subject:
This is a problem I've had with the few interactions I've managed to get to. How to chase a girl without seeming lame. Like by pure accident I'll have a girl all over me long term but only because I wasn't trying to pick her up then when I realise I put in interest and you can tell they've lost interest. Also as a newbie it can be hard to distinguish a girl being hard to get or just NOT ALL OVER YOU and a girl just not into you but just making conversation with you. Nice post. Any practical tips or anything?

Author:	smokeit [ Tue Mar 20, 2012 11:55 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: This is a problem I've had with the few interactions I've managed to get to. How to chase a girl without seeming lame. Like by pure accident I'll have a girl all over me long term but only because I wasn't trying to pick her up then when I realise I put in interest and you can tell they've lost interest. Also as a newbie it can be hard to distinguish a girl being hard to get or just NOT ALL OVER YOU and a girl just not into you but just making conversation with you. Nice post. Any practical tips or anything? That's why you kino/flirt. If she responds positively. Escalate. It's not rocket science.

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Author:	zappo [ Wed Mar 21, 2012 1:51 am ]
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My day game is like that, it works wonders for me in making girls "choose me" but then they hand themselves on a platter to me and i just feel like " eww no " as theirs no chase at all for me to persu. I see what your saying about making them chase you and then you turn around and be like " hey so we both like eachother lets do something" she runs a mile. I feel like if your always keeping her on her toes then shes likely to stay around a while longer but its no safe ground to start a relationship on.

Author:	TygaNasty [ Wed Mar 21, 2012 2:09 am ]
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Ehh I agree to a certain extent. It's not always "Oh you showed interest now I'm going to ditch you."

Author:	lolaskate [ Thu Mar 22, 2012 5:39 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Ehh I agree to a certain extent. It's not always "Oh you showed interest now I'm going to ditch you." I think he means if the girls entire interest in you was due to you not showing interest and being "mysterious". I like it

Author:	Seville [ Thu Mar 22, 2012 2:16 pm ]
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It's like eliminating the game all together in a sense. Go after what you want and be the man that isn't easy to get because they have to earn your trust, respect and attraction. Flawless victory!

Author:	eduardo2 [ Thu Mar 22, 2012 5:45 pm ]
Post subject:
I don't really believe in letting her "chase you". Girls don't chase. not hot ones especially because they have EGO too. they are so used to men going after them all along so it should take something out of this world to get her to call you couple of times, not to say "Chase you". I do believe in reciprocation of hit ups against each other (you contact her, she contacts you) but i don't think a hot girl will chase you all the way through. not even if you're super high value...

Author:	skills360 [ Thu Mar 22, 2012 6:01 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: I don't really believe in letting her "chase you". Girls don't chase. not hot ones especially because they have EGO too. they are so used to men going after them all along so it should take something out of this world to get her to call you couple of times, not to say "Chase you". I do believe in reciprocation of hit ups against each other (you contact her, she contacts you) but i don't think a hot girl will chase you all the way through. not even if you're super high value... Women do chase, you would be surprised...Specially when you have other women, they like competition...

Author:	Seville [ Fri Mar 23, 2012 1:56 pm ]
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Quote: Women do chase, you would be surprised...Specially when you have other women, they like competition... Marilyn Monroe is the perfect example. She had the worl in her hands and then she got hit with the JFK.

Author:	smokeit [ Fri Mar 23, 2012 4:25 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: Women do chase, you would be surprised...Specially when you have other women, they like competition... Marilyn Monroe is the perfect example. She had the worl in her hands and then she got hit with the JFK. yup, you stand out when they notice a lack of attention. its there DRUG!

Author:	Marc [ Sat Mar 24, 2012 11:04 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Making her chase you?
Quote: Some guys like to "flip the script" by trying to make the girl chase them instead of showing direct interest. It might sound good in theory, but what's going to happen when you actually try to get together with a girl who's chasing you like mad? I'll tell you what: she's going to lose interest because she's "caught" you and you're no longer a challenge. THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS EXPLAINING TO MY FRIEND the other day. This is soo true and I speak from experience. I was the Star Athlete of my School of 2000 or more students, Top Student and one of the Star Athletes amongst 50 schools in the district. Guess what - Never had problems in girls chasing me but always wondered how can someone chase somebody so much but then walked away after they have been with you. It took me a lot of years to figure this out and then my whole approach for whom I allow to enter in my life changed.

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Author:	Chris2k10 [ Sun Mar 25, 2012 3:23 pm ]
Post subject:
The only exception is when you've already gone direct and shown your interest but because she is still given you trouble after plowing, you can then walk away and say something like, "Say what you want, but I will never apologize for what I want." or the classic "It was a pleasure meeting you, first name." Do not judge her, do not break rapport. Sympathize, keep it genuine, but on your own terms. "Yeah I understand what you mean. It's just that you're pretty and I have to see you instead of talking to you on the phone for hours." If a girl chases you and you show some interest and she runs a mile, it's not because she lost interest in you. It's because she wants to see if you can be a male and if you really want her (are you being genuine?) I have had many instances where a girl was chasing me non-stop. Sometimes it was because I was playing hard to get or I was just aloof to the situation. Now I don't do it on purpose anymore because of experience. But I've been able to get plenty of girls back after they chased me. I didn't lose them forever. They just wanted to see if I liked them back. It's that simple. Attraction is neither created nor destroyed. ***The main point here is that there is almost NO difference whether you play hard to get or whether you do the chasing. The only difference is that if you play hard to get, you will eventually have to chase anyways when you could of done that from the beginning instead. You are wasting time. Also, let's not use the word "chase" here. All seduction is a MUTUAL agreement between man and female. Do not waste your time with women who have absolutely no interest in you.