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Fundamental problem with being a PUA
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Author:  gravesRR7 [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 12:56 am ]
Post subject:  Fundamental problem with being a PUA
before learning to be a PUA, any time i was in a relationship, it took so much work and time that I valued it so much.

Recently, as soon as I hook up with a girl, I start to resent her, because it was SO easy to seduce her. My skills have gotten pretty good, and I've seduced two girls this past week, and immediately after it happened, I wasn't attracted to them anymore.

I feel like, how can she be a high-value female if she was THAT easy to get in to bed.

anyone else?
Author:  .EnVy. [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 2:00 pm ]
Post subject: 
That happens sometimes to people.
I have heard a few people say that
to me, and I think it's something that
you can get over.

The point of you using the game is to
GET the girl. If you get her, then you've
succeeded in your attempts.

Even if you DO get the girl, that should
not lower her value...maybe it's just
because you know what you're doing and
she was attracted to you.

But I know what you're saying...to me,
it's more rewarding when the girl plays
"hard-to-get."

Regardless, being a PUA means you go
after what you want and you GET IT.
Author:  snubby (aka Zen) [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 2:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
Haha, now you see why women play hard to get and put up "bitch shields." Suddenly it all makes sense.

Don't lower a woman's value in your mind just because she enjoys sex. We are all human, and it's part of being human. Just be glad you've found a way to break through the barriers and connect with women. :D
Author:  Starbuck [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 3:32 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Fundamental problem with being a PUA
Quote:

I feel like, how can she be a high-value female if she was THAT easy to get in to bed.

anyone else?
She can't.

Anymore questions?

Snubby makes a great point. Now you know why women withhold sex, and are socially conditioned to be difficult often contrary to their nature, etc.. And why DHV is an especially attractive strategy when dealing with girls of higher value.

DHV on a girl with self esteem or other such issues? Often self defeating. Because they will always often overestimate your distance as a personal insult. I mean every guy wants them. If you don't you must be gay, or an asshole or something. I used this technique for years to weed out the undesirables. It sometimes meant sleeping alone, but heck I don't have a prescription for Valtrex and have never had an STD either.

These younger girls are so often hit on they tend to equate their desirability and physical attractiveness purely based upon your desire to have sex with them. This can be a slippery slope.

You know.., choke me in the shallow water before I get too deep?

Whereas you want to have sex with them. But then if it's this easy for you, what else does she really bring to the table. Not much. And that's the paradox between the pick up arts and long term relationships in a nutshell. Once you understand just how easy it can be with some girls, you tend to apply such conclusions to all women. And self sabotage your own long term relationships with them, due to a lack of trust in the female species as a whole.

That's the purpose of leading. You can sometimes snap a salvageable girl out of destructive social conditioning and behavior by simply showing her there's another way. And that means DHV. That means playing her role by withholding sex initially if she means anything to you beyond just a sex toy in the short term.

And if she shows a lack of character and self control/discipline in regards to her sex life and your personal health (in the form of promiscuity etc..) you're better of without that one. By the time she's 25 or 30 she'll probably turn into a decent woman capable of a relationship. Too bad she's still a depreciating and often damaged asset.

Because it's hard to give a girl the full SPAM sexually or otherwise while at the same time wondering which other guy was with her last night. And in the long term she will make your life miserable.

You end up with a girl like that, there's always the Jerry Springer show, Cheaters, DNA tests, etc... :lol:

It's not funny if it's you.
Author:  gravesRR7 [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 4:53 pm ]
Post subject: 
wow. great replies guys. :D


on a sidenote. my ex and I are thinking of getting back together. our problesm started because of lack of sex (initiated by her).

Maybe that's why I value her so much, we waited for a LONG time before having sex, and she is certainly not giving it away easily, even after 2 years of being together.

my advice to any aspiring PUA. Be the one to STOP the foreplay (as recommended by Mystery in his book). If you are the one to stop it, before it gets past the 'point of no return' you will both have increased desire for each other, and increased respect.
Author:  .EnVy. [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 6:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
wow. great replies guys. :D


on a sidenote. my ex and I are thinking of getting back together. our problesm started because of lack of sex (initiated by her).

Maybe that's why I value her so much, we waited for a LONG time before having sex, and she is certainly not giving it away easily, even after 2 years of being together.

my advice to any aspiring PUA. Be the one to STOP the foreplay (as recommended by Mystery in his book). If you are the one to stop it, before it gets past the 'point of no return' you will both have increased desire for each other, and increased respect.
Exactly! You have the right idea.
It also prevents LMR from the
woman if one acts like they are
not after sex. She'll realize that
he will stay with her AFTER they
do it, and will be more willing to
initiate it.
Author:  gravesRR7 [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 6:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
quote]

Exactly! You have the right idea.
It also prevents LMR from the
woman if one acts like they are
not after sex. She'll realize that
he will stay with her AFTER they
do it, and will be more willing to
initiate it.
you just gave me an "Ah Ha" moment.

We did break up (for among other reasons) I was pitfifully unhappy with our sex life. It's not everything, but it is important to at least have one.

Since this has happened, she always gets very frisky, but it never leads to sex (or sex related acts). It's just always LOTS of foreplay.

Seems to me like i fucked myself over with her, because i did exactly that. I reinforced that I will not stick around if there is no sex.

but i feel like, if I go back to her, she'll know that she'll be able to take sex away anytime she wants to, and I'll still stick around.

any advice on how to demonstrate or show her that I will stick around after sex?
Author:  L.A. Tripp [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 7:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Well, I can understand the girl not giving it up easily AT FIRST. But, damn after 2 YEARS? With my girl, she knows that I'm not here JUST for the sex. She knows that I am her protector and her partner. She has NO DOUBT about that. BUT, she also knows that sex is a HUGE part of any relationship to me. I mean, she knows that she needs to "put out".

One thing that might help you with this one is thinking about the four core attraction switches. Two of them, at this point, probably won't make a difference in your situation, but I think the other two will.

The first two that probably won't matter for you at this very moment are:
1. Leader of men
2. Preselected by women

But, if you're needing to show her, or reinforce to her, that you're willing to stay around after the sex, then maybe these two will make a difference:
3. Willing to emote (in other words willing to show emotion)
4. Protector of loved ones.

Think about those two for a bit and see if that's what's missing.
Author:  L.A. Tripp [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 7:20 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
but i feel like, if I go back to her, she'll know that she'll be able to take sex away anytime she wants to, and I'll still stick around.

any advice on how to demonstrate or show her that I will stick around after sex?
For that, you still have to let her know how important the sex aspect is to YOU in the relationship.
Author:  .EnVy. [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 9:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
There are a lot of ways you can do this.
Use the "you've hijacked my brain routine."

What you say is:

"You know, the strangest thing happened
to me...for some reason, yesterday I could
not get you out of my head. I kept thinking
about you and I couldn't figure out why. Then
it hit me...you've hijacked my brain.

Damn, babe...what did you do to me? I hate you
for getting into my head like that."

That's one. Here's another:

"Whenever you sit next to me, I always end
up looking at you...I don't know why I do that
though. I wasn't given an instruction book on
how to be human, I just live my life day by
day, and for some reason I can't help but look
at you...and when I do, I look away, because
I don't want to creep you out...and I don't want
to creep myself out either! I've been with some of
the prettiest girls at (work/school/club/etc.) and
I seem to like them a lot, but I never look at them
the same way as you. I can't figure it out, but
I just like to look at you. Weird, I know..."

*Credit to Mystery.

Use vague reasons...don't logic her to death, just
tell her that you don't know why it's happening.
This way, she'll feel like she has you where she
wants you, and that you will not leave after sex.

There are TONS of stories that I could throw out
at you with these routines embedded in them. So,
just think of a few, and you'll be able to phase shift
into S1, S2 and finally, S3.
Author:  Cretin105 [ Mon Nov 19, 2007 8:53 pm ]
Post subject: 
in the words of Mystery . . "Its not just about picking up women . . . its about building a life" i think thats where also some people go wrong, yea for some you join the community solely for picking up women, but also look around you look how far you have come and look how many great people you have met on the way.

Still . . . IMO i love picking up women dont get me wrong


Happy Sargin
Author:  Starbuck [ Mon Nov 19, 2007 10:08 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
in the words of Mystery . . "Its not just about picking up women . . . its about building a life" i think thats where also some people go wrong, yea for some you join the community solely for picking up women, but also look around you look how far you have come and look how many great people you have met on the way.

Still . . . IMO i love picking up women dont get me wrong


Happy Sargin
Yes of course.

But then the choice is also building a life of superficial relationships, or building a life of deep and fulfilled ones.

At some point you will want to settle down and stop all the superficial nonsense. You will do so for a number of reasons. Children, maturity, economics, convenience, loyalty, etc..

Some people never reach this level, and they never find their match.

Learning the art of pick up among other things increases your opportunities to end up with someone you really care about, rather than someone that just happens to be around at the time.
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