PUA Forum :: Update on seducing my friend

Things went ok at the mall.

The Bad:

1. Virtually no Kino. It was crowded so there was some arm to arm, but besides the in-car hug at the end, all kino was limited and incidental.

The good.

2. Besides me being in the friendzone, I'm convinced I'm superior to homeboy. If we were in the same room, My social proof should put us at completely different levels. I know her better and what she wants in a man. My challenge if showing her I have it.

we had about 5 hours of time with no awkwardness . . .
Clothes, went clothes shopping. It was awkward at first

but eventually I was able to pick out things that I thought she'd look good in. She even bought one of the dresses I picked. I didn't get to see her trying anything on, but not too concerned about that. I just wanted to show that we can have a good time doing anything, Something that homeboy lacks.

I don't think she is aware of my intentions, which is a bad thing. how should I go on from here?

Author:	eye-Z [ Fri Nov 16, 2007 10:28 pm ]
Post subject:	Update on seducing my friend
Update of my last post on trying to get a friend that knows I used to like her. Spent some time getting in good with the friends, and they like me now. Now I'm moving in to isolate and build kino I'm supposed to call her later today with weekend plans. I know this is a test because she has a thing with people breaking their word in the past. I have two fears: I. She'll expect a group outing, and be surprised when she finds out its just the two of us. II. I don't want to escalate too quickly -- I don't want to say time is on my side, but we've been friends for so long my chances won't decrease with time at the rate they would with girls I just met. I told her I liked her in the past and her friends say I woulda had a chance if I acted years ago, when It was clear from my actions that I was interested. I'm just worried that If I show interest now, It'll seem like I was lying when I told her (even though at the time it really was past tense) any advice before I go in?

Author:	L.A. Tripp [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 12:16 am ]
Post subject:
I would actually say do the opposite of what your fears are. DON'T be afraid of her thinking it's a one-on-one deal. If you make it enticing to her, she will love that idea. She might already be hoping for it. You never know. Also, don't focus on "taking your time" because time is on your side. No. Escalate as fast as she will let you. If she doesn't stop you, that pretty well means you have an open door to keep going BECAUSE SHE WANTS YOU TOO. So, go for it.

Author:	eye-Z [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 1:50 am ]
Post subject:
Thanks trip, its helping to get me in the right state of mind. what about me saying That I liked her past tense? I'm worried that she thinks its all in the past, when really i got over her at the time because I was with someone else.

Author:	L.A. Tripp [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 2:17 am ]
Post subject:
Just don't worry about it unless she brings it up. Go with the present and just roll.

Author:	eye-Z [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 8:41 pm ]
Post subject:	update
I called her at a bad time but she stayed on the phone, no awkwardness about it being just me and her. I proposed we go to the mall and eat and go shopping (I'm going to get CD's instead of cologne though). She was excited cuz she wanted to go to one of her stores that was having a sale. looks like I better break out the red bull. one of my other posts someone mentioned that shopping is good because I could help her pick something hot. I'll keep you posted

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Author:	L.A. Tripp [ Sat Nov 17, 2007 9:20 pm ]
Post subject:
The fact that she stayed on the phone with you when it was a BAD TIME for her is good. That's an IOI. Going to the mall is great. Yes, the shopping thing can be cool. But, instead of YOU spending all your money on her, what you need to do is just FIND INTERESTING AND COOL things to show her and talk to her about. Don't go throwing all of your money away at the mall either. Remember, you're not going there to show her your rich. You're showing her that you are an interesting and cool person to be with. And that she should want to be with you more.

Author:	eye-Z [ Sun Nov 18, 2007 3:48 am ]
Post subject:
Things went ok at the mall. The Bad: 1. Virtually no Kino. It was crowded so there was some arm to arm, but besides the in-car hug at the end, all kino was limited and incidental. 2. She mentioned a guy (from now on referred to as homeboy) that she has been trying to get him to ask her out. After hearing her situation, I'm convinced He's either AFC/ not interested, or Stupid. But she still tries to get his attention. she mentioned some of the difficulties she's had, and I pointed out to her that it shows he's missing key personality traits she wants in a boyfriend. I think they have a date sometime this weekend The good. 1.At lunch she threw out the idea of ditching the mall for a movie. she later retracted because she didn't have a jacket and would get cold. but there was mutual interest in seeing movies that could definitely set-up later outings. 2. Besides me being in the friendzone, I'm convinced I'm superior to homeboy. If we were in the same room, My social proof should put us at completely different levels. I know her better and what she wants in a man. My challenge if showing her I have it. 3. I spent no money on her. from the get go it was just about us spending time together. we had about 5 hours of time with no awkwardness. When I liked her as an AFC years ago, there was a shitload of awkwardness. Clothes, went clothes shopping. It was awkward at first but eventually I was able to pick out things that I thought she'd look good in. She even bought one of the dresses I picked. I didn't get to see her trying anything on, but not too concerned about that. I just wanted to show that we can have a good time doing anything, Something that homeboy lacks. I don't think she is aware of my intentions, which is a bad thing. how should I go on from here?

Author:	L.A. Tripp [ Sun Nov 18, 2007 4:36 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: Things went ok at the mall. The Bad: 1. Virtually no Kino. It was crowded so there was some arm to arm, but besides the in-car hug at the end, all kino was limited and incidental. Ok, you should have been able to have your hand on the small of her back at the very least. Quote: The good. 2. Besides me being in the friendzone, I'm convinced I'm superior to homeboy. If we were in the same room, My social proof should put us at completely different levels. I know her better and what she wants in a man. My challenge if showing her I have it. Social proof should be able to be shown in any social setting. Quote: we had about 5 hours of time with no awkwardness . . . Clothes, went clothes shopping. It was awkward at first HUHHHHHH? Quote: but eventually I was able to pick out things that I thought she'd look good in. She even bought one of the dresses I picked. I didn't get to see her trying anything on, but not too concerned about that. I just wanted to show that we can have a good time doing anything, Something that homeboy lacks. I don't think she is aware of my intentions, which is a bad thing. how should I go on from here? Hmm, you should have had her to try things on that you picked. Yes, it's good that you had a good time. And yes, she does need to be aware of your intentions at this point. So, tell her. Get together with her again, have fun again, and tell her.

Author:	eye-Z [ Sun Nov 18, 2007 8:50 am ]
Post subject:
clarification on the awkwardness: There was no awkwardness in our interaction. But with the clothes it took me a little bit to get used to her sense of style and figure out how to pick things for her. Just my lack of experience with women's clothes made me feel weird, although I didn't show it in my body language. She's supposed to be out with homeboy right now, but I sent her a text and replied immediately, so it either ended earlier or he flaked. we're gonna try to do something next weekend. I guess I'm wondering what's the best way to let her know "I think we'd be good for each other, we should try dating." our next outing will prolly be a group one too, which I think is a good thing, I can work on being alpha and body language. How do I bring up the subject of us?

Author:	L.A. Tripp [ Sun Nov 18, 2007 8:55 am ]
Post subject:
If you go out in a group, at some point ISOLATE her. That's how you bring up the subject of you as a couple and that you think you would be a good couple. At some point during the outing, you just take her hand and say "come on, follow me." Take her somewhere away from the group, sit her down if possible, and start talking to her. I would say "look, let's quit playing around with each other. I like you, you like me. Let's take this to the next level."

Author:	eye-Z [ Sun Nov 18, 2007 2:23 pm ]
Post subject:
Thanks again dude, I'm trying to push this thing through and this forum is helping. I think next time I'll see her well be about a week, I hoping it can be a a club because dancing is actually one of my strength. my plan so far is to make her laugh, up kino, then Isolate.

Author:	VanHaven [ Sun Nov 18, 2007 7:29 pm ]
Post subject:
Don't be afraid to send out your own IOIs. Tell her she's sexy in that dress you picked out.

Author:	.EnVy. [ Sun Nov 18, 2007 9:20 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Don't be afraid to send out your own IOIs. Tell her she's sexy in that dress you picked out. But only in A3... A3 is the stage AFTER she has been attracted to you. A3 is the first time that you give the girl IOIs, and will only work successfully if the girls is attracted to you first.

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