last night i decided to put into practice for the first time what i've been reading about PU etc, in my goal to become a better person, to be more confident and ultimately be good at attracting woman. this thread I intend to update regularly on my progress at becoming a PUA as i do consider myself an AFC still.
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Below is some background which you might or might not choose to read
The night started out at a party I went with a chick friend of mine, who i have only known about a month. She's very average looking overweight and I guess around a HB5, what she doesn't have in looks she makes up for in personality. She is seriously one of the flirtiest girls I know, so talking with her can be fun at times. She also works as a massage therapist and doesn't have any problems touching, in fact she goes too far and initiates touching, often too much and i get uncomfortable, but it seems the more i reject her touching the more she actually ends up liking me, since most of her male friends welcome the touching...
Oh and she has ALOT of male friends, and just for the record I did actually sleep with her once when i first met her but since have decided not to go there again... Now the crazy part she has a boyfriend. the most passive AFC boyfriend ever.. he was told that i slept with her, but he had only been together with her two weeks and didn't even dump her.
Next I actually meet the guy when i arrange to hang out as friends with her he's there too! and he doesn't smash me, in fact I ended up getting along really well with him and got his cell number so we can hang out and play pool together etc. And i have seen the guy stand there passively while another of her male "friends" blatantly rubs her leg under the table... I've been told that he really likes her, that he has even said he's "in love" with her. I can't understand why he would put up with this behavior from her! He is obviously an AFC also...
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So anyway she invites me to a party tonight with her boyfriend also where I know there will be alot of HB's. I end up meeting alot of chicks at the party. I talked to a few of them for a while, but my mind went blank alot of the time getting stuck for things to say - guess it is all practice, my mind was racing trying to remember names as I got introduced to 7 or 8 chicks in a very short time...
after a while trying to figure out what chick I should talk to more - ended up choosing the flirtiest girl, she was acting single, and thought i could practice negging a bit with her. HB8 I would say. Was a dress up party I had a crocodile on a chain around my neck - steve irwin. She asked me who I was I said I'm the crocodile hunter! she looked shocked. "It's a bit soon don't you think! That would be as bad as dressing up as Michael Jackson!" I really couldn't think of a come back from that so I just laughed, then asked her who she was supposed to be. She said somebody who i had no idea who they were, had a blank look on my face so she asked "have you heard of her before" I said no... she said "well she's a total hot babe!" so I said... "You're supposed to be a hot babe? I don't see the resemblance" I thought for sure It wasn't going to go down well at all, and it felt more like I was insulting her than negging. I think this was a pretty lame thing to say. fortunately she didn't seem to mind?! I know a neg should be a backhanded compliment here it just seemed like a straight out insult.
I went outside for a ciggie and starting talking with this guy out there who in my opinion was the coolest guy in the whole party, he had the hottest chicks and my female friend came outside also and she started putting her arm around me, I was giving off uncomfortable body language but it carried on, and her bf was standing there passively again. It really was starting to bug me. I didn't want to be seen having this really average chick around me so I took her arm from around me and said at the same time to her bf "dude can you control your girlfriend please?!!" If anything that might have made me look a bit better but is it a good idea for me to keep hanging out with this chick? I haven't known her long - but I really don't want anything to stuff up my game. Shes cool with me gaming though and does help me with it, like I will talk with her about what i'm doing and stuff. How can I stop all this touching from her?
Near the end of the party people were going to town, getting in taxi's etc and I was outside with just me and her. I was following behind her so i said "where are you leading me?" she said i'm not leading you anywhere. I said "yes you are. Im following you, and you're leading me somewhere!" she said.. "Maybe back to my house"... I was said "Oh really?" she said yes but "I live with my mum" I think this whole thing could have been a shit test to see how keen I was cos I didn't kino her at all or anything. I said the wrong thing. I said "oh you live with your mum, thats ok thats still kinda cool, i'll come back with you" I just shot myself in my foot. I was acting too egger and things got awkward pretty fast after that... Have learnt my mistake here. She went back with her friends and I never really spoke to her again. I'm wondering now if the whole thing was a so called "shit test" I think I should have joked around about NOT wanting to go back with her... in fact I was indifferent to the idea of going back so maybe saying yes I was acting too out of character... In any rate alot of the conversations at the party went well and If I see any of those chicks again I'm sure i will do better next time around.
went clubbing next.
Was dancing in town looking for IOI's and HB girls that i would actually be interested in approaching. after dancing next to these two girls and choosing who i wanted to approach I starting thinking of my opener... looking at her she had amazing hair, but I couldn't think of anything to turn that into a neg. then I saw it. she was wearing a scarf, the only chick on dancefloor to be wearing one. so I approach her and say
"Hey I like your scarf!"
she looks at me but doesn't say anything so i repeat myself again...
"Hey I like your scarf"
she says .."thanks"
waiting for a bit then i say....
".....Do you think its going to snow in here or something?"
her friend who she was dancing with which I had been ignoring up to this point turns to me and says "we're on a girls night tonight" and grabs her friends hand back and pulls her closer
I begin to attempt to talk about how there girls night is going and they start singing the music to each other and dancing close, louder the more I try to talk. i get the body language that they don't want me to continue talking to them so I return to my friends.
Overall I enjoyed the opener, got a bit of a kick out of it. I probably wasn't as confident as i should have been.. and I think i made the mistake of only talking to one of the girls initially. maybe I should have opened both of them with a "chicks opinion." but do girls know about "chicks opinion" by now? I mean that is a pretty damn common way to open, every website out there talks about it im sure its so commonplace chicks will roll there eyes.... I was hoping for a more flirty response from the snow in here... I am sure I was onto something there.....any feedback on how i went? I was rejected although it wasn't a harsh rejection.
I am reasonably shy and quiet, it does take a while for me to be comfortable around chicks and i have serious inner game issues in general - which is bound to affect PU, I have been fighting depression so it takes alot of effort to mask this, and pretend to be the happy and fun guy that chicks are going to want to date. Believe me I am working on my inner game so i wont have to mask anything. but having more attention from girls would really help me alot...
I'm going to keep using this thread in future so anyone interested can follow my attempts as I plan to practice openers every weekend now, or at least every time im out with my mates - practice, practice, practice.
I guess there is also the possibility for me to look at trying day game too, girls seem less approachable during the day, but It is worth a try.
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" to which she replied "me too i have a doctorate in it!" I said "wicked! you'll be able to teach me a few things" then i started talking about what i really do, and found out what she does. I didn't see her again and didn't number close or anything. Good chance i might see her again though.
and she invited me to a bus trip in a few weeks so that should be interesting...