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FR: HB in the gym
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Author:  AFC2012 [ Fri Jul 17, 2009 2:13 pm ]
Post subject:  FR: HB in the gym
Hi,

I am pretty new to all the vocab, so please bear with me.

About a week and a half ago, was a Tuesday at about 2.00pm I decided to go to the gym for a cardio session (my gym-chick day). As I came out of the changing rooms, I saw a 8.5/10 brunette wearing all black walking around and talking to some guy, walking towards the abs area (which i assume could be her BF, maybe brother?). As I walked towards the treadmills, I passed nearby and we exchanged brief looks.
So, I was walking on the treadmill for about 5 minutes (really can't say how long, could have been anything up to 10mins), when I see her approaching my proximity from the back of my eye. I am walking on a treadmill, sidebyside with 5 other treadmills. I am on the 2nd to the left tread. She steps on the 1st left tread.
I waited about 5 minutes (she ran for 5 mins and started walking like me) until i spoke to her and said:
Me: "How do you have the stamina to run like that?", (she ran like a duck, lol!)
HB: "Its easy, you just run to the beat",
Pause,
Me: "Dnt i look like i am walking to the moon, on this!"
HB: "Why aren't you running?",
Me: "I ve got a shin injury, so i gotta take it easy.."

Then i ran out of stuff to say! She ran for another 5 minutes and just walked off. She went back to talk to the guy again.
Any advice or opinions and what I could do if i see her again?
P.S. How would someone ask if the girl was with her BF at the gym???
Author:  Ordy [ Fri Jul 17, 2009 4:04 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'd like to hear about this as well. I'm decent at starting small talk like that, but don't know how to follow up on it.
Author:  kingcarmelo [ Fri Jul 17, 2009 7:44 pm ]
Post subject: 
when asked why you weren't running I would of negged her and said "so i don't put you to shame". You probably should of told a story about how you got your injury which would possibly of led her to continue the conversation.

When im trying to see if a girl has a bf I usually just make a statement that assumes she has a bf. e.g

me- how does your boyfriend put up with you?
her- who said I had a boyfriend?
me- who else is going to baby sit u.
Author:  Tigra [ Fri Jul 17, 2009 8:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
when asked why you weren't running I would of negged her and said "so i don't put you to shame". You probably should of told a story about how you got your injury which would possibly of led her to continue the conversation.

When im trying to see if a girl has a bf I usually just make a statement that assumes she has a bf. e.g

me- how does your boyfriend put up with you?
her- who said I had a boyfriend?
me- who else is going to baby sit u.
you MIGHT want to build some rapport before you say that. Dont want to come off as an asshole. Remember, there is a fair difference between negs and an evident insult.

cheers :twisted:
Author:  AFC2012 [ Fri Jul 17, 2009 8:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
You probably should of told a story about how you got your injury which would possibly of led her to continue the conversation.
This sounds like a good start, I had problems thinking of what else to talk about.
Author:  eskwire [ Sat Jul 18, 2009 2:09 am ]
Post subject: 
You're off to a good start - approaching and talking to the girl puts you ahead of 95% of the guys out there, so props for that.

You should have acknowledged her presence the moment she stepped on the treadmill instead of waiting five minutes. Just saying hello is better than nothing - then let her do her run and after she stops in five minutes start a real conversation. By waiting so long, the impression you give is you had to work up the courage to talk.

Your inner game could use a turbo charge. All you know is that she was talking to another male. You should not assume that because she is talking to a guy, it is her boyfriend. When you make an assumption like that the underlying belief that goes with the assumption is "since she has a boyfriend, if I pick up on her it will be unsuccessful." If you go in with that frame of mind, chances are your pick-up will follow your belief and you will be unsuccessful.

I would not neg the girl here. Neg's are only effective to even the playing field if your target thinks she is superior to you. By negging her you bring her down to your level. Nothing in your post suggests that this girl thinks she is superior to you.

In fact, she sounded like she was into you - she asked you a question, which could be construed as a glimmer of an IOI.

You answered her question with a factual statement: "I have a shin injury... so I gotta take it easy". Then you didn't say anything. You could have followed that up with something playful, like "well I guess my training regimen to qualify for the Boston Marathon is off to poor start."

And follow it up with "maybe this year I'll just walk a 5k".

Then ask her some open ended questions - they don't have to be carefully crafted questions, just get the conversation rolling - for example:

"What do you think of this gym?"

"What's a good cardio exercise besides the treadmill?"

Make closed statements:

"My name is Eskwire, it's a pleasure to meet you."

"It's a really great feeling to hit the gym after a long day of work"

Make up a story:

"I used to train with a former marine - she was like a drill sergeant, but I really got in shape. What do you think about having a personal trainer?"

Just remember, you gotta keep the conversation going. Good luck!
Author:  Exerio [ Sat Jul 18, 2009 10:25 am ]
Post subject: 
I would agree with what eskwire is saying, perhaps throwing in some fun facts along the way.

This is not gym-related, but yesterday a girl told me: "Wow, I really like the dragon on your t-shirt." Since this is an area I am fairly familiar with I had a conversation with her for about 10-20 minutes simply about that topic. Try to make observations like that yourself, and you'll find yourself never running out of things to say:)
Author:  Kalel [ Sun Jul 19, 2009 5:23 am ]
Post subject: 
In my experience the gym is a very odd environment for pickup. Some women only go their to be gawked at, so they can inflate their ego. Some women are in their own world and don't want to be bothered. But some are there only to meet men, so it's really a role of the dice when it comes to gym chicks.

One thing I have noticed is that everyone reverts back to their more primitive instincts at a gym. Most men are amogging other men. Women respond to strong body language and eye contact more. Guys try to win women over with feats of strength. The tension in the air is almost palatable. It feels like fighting over a woman with a bunch of cavemen. Must be all the testosterone being released.
Author:  cool_boy [ Sun Jul 19, 2009 9:08 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
me- who else is going to baby sit u.
I couldnt get the sense of tiz sentence.Actually i didnt understand what message it gives HB. Is there anyone who can explain the point of it?
Author:  trainspotter [ Mon Jul 20, 2009 1:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
If you see her again apply the 3 second rule
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