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| FR: Tucker Max https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=22&t=41094 |
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| Author: | SUB-ZERO [ Sun Mar 08, 2009 6:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | FR: Tucker Max |
I went out last night having just completed the book called "I hope they serve beer in Hell" by: Tucker Max On his website Tuckermax.com you can read some of his drunken exploits that are without a doubt very funny. In the story about picking up a midget, he expresses that he is nervous about it and he is never nervous around women. (No AA ever) "Is this what average guys feel like when they are around women, this sucks" Anyway I went out and decided to try some of this outrageous behavior just to see what happens. I also brought a digital voice recorder to catch some of the highlights. Here is the most notable things I did pretending to be another Tucker Max. I was at a sports bar that had some pool tables, restaurant, and some band playing there. At the front counter 2 milfs came to get balls to play pool. ME"you guys think you can play pool?" milfs"yes" Me"I'm coming over in 5 minute to play with you" milfs"o.k." ten mins later I approach but now there is fou of them. They are part of a large group of hockey moms that are having girls night out. (sweet) I fluff them for a while and decide I want to smoke. Me"do any of you chicks smoke?" HB7"yeah the brunette" Me"hey smoker lets go have a cigarette" the hottest milf I have ever seen (smoking hot milf looks at me) Me"no not you, the brunette one who smokes" HB10blondemilf"We are gonna go dance but will get you to smoke later" Me"you have 5 minutes to get me, I'm going over to that table, it's where the cool people are and I'm their leader. I leave and noticed I just opened a set with no AA, but it wasn't very Tucker Max at all. I got my table with friends and notice another regular trying to mack on some lonely girl whos friends are dancing. "Look at scrotum head, he thinks he has a chance with her" friend"go steal her" Me"no problem, he is gonna hate me after this." I get to the table but lonely girls 2 friends come piling back to a square table and sit down. Than the waitress brings shots from the bar owner but gives one to me instead of the guy I'm trying to AMOG.(sucka) I do the shot and notice well if I'm gonna try and act Tucker I better start drinking more. I decide its time to start in with some insults. Me to lonely HB"Where did you get that watch" (it hand a pink band and fake diamond bezels) her"I got it from my friend" Me"It looks like it came out of a gumball machine from the grocery store" (not much response) Me"are you even old enough to be in here" HB"no I'm only 15" sarcasticly Me"thats good because Scrotumhead won't want you once you hit 18" Scrotumhead notices the girls are only interested in what I'm saying and I totally blew him out so he leaves. Me to girl #2 "I think I just insulted your friend" #2 "thats o.k." Me "If she can't take a joke, fuck her, so how do you all know each other" #2"me and her met because for 6 months we were fucking the same guy and than found out. #3"yes, what an assclown" #2"he actually had 2 other girls too but we never met them" Me"do you still have his number?" #3 "yes, why?" Me "I bet he'd be a sweet wingman" I eject to go get more booze. When I get to the bar another AMOG is sitting there asking why I tried to pick up a bunch of married cougars. I respond"They are funner to hang out with than all you fucking queers" He graciously shuts the fuck up. Jack Daniels please. I noticed the HB10milf and 3 others heading out to smoke, but I'm not at the table I said I was going to be at so they just wlaked out back. I asked my friend Joe to go smoke with me after I do a couple shots. We go outside and it was cold. I can start to feel the booze taking over at this point. Now Im getting in the zone. Me very loudly"Its kinda cold out here, my nipples are getting hard" Milfs look at me while I touch them Me "do you want to feel them" I walk closer and one of the milfs rubs mine nipples. Joe is liking this display as he sits as beta as possible 8 feet away. milf"your nipples are small" Me"what were you expecting, double Ds" milfs laughing, now she's rubbing hers as if I should touch them Me" I'm not touching your boobs, I'm more of an ass guy" milf "mine are small too, but you can grab my ass" she turns around and sticks it out. I of course grab and squeeze. Me"do you want to hear my worst married woman pick up line? milfs enthusiastically "YES" (this is stolen from Tucker) Me "so your married" milf "yes" Me"how is it going for ya?" milf "good" Me"so I don't have a chance to fuck you in my car right now, its parked right over there?" Milfs laughing, than HB10milf chimes in "thats like that one movie, so your saying theres a chance?" Joe"Dumb and Dumber" HB10 "yes" now laughing (joe just took my spotlight so I took it immediatly back) Me"remember the snowball fight seen" HB10"oh that was fucking hilarious" we start re enacting the fucking movie scene without the snow and Joe walks back to bar "so I guess you don't need a wingman then" Whatever, opening when you feel 0 pressure try and impress anybody at all really helps open sets. I was already impressing all the guys in the bar too afraid to even chat with these babes. I won the crowd over and naturally the HBs came with it. [/code][/url] |
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| Author: | Carnavorr [ Fri Mar 13, 2009 8:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
That's fuckin awesome man. Some hilarious stuff in there. I had a buddy that decided to do a night like that. He actually pulled a fuckin hot ass married woman back to his room but he could never turn the asshole stuff off. Eventually she got fed up before he got her naked and she left. Nice job though; and Tucker's stuff is all hilarious |
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