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| First day https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=22&t=172676 |
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| Author: | smith1 [ Sat Dec 07, 2013 6:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | First day |
Hey guys, like everyone on here I want to meet more women. Been in a long term relationship so I'm completely new to all this but have done some reading up. Thought I'd write up how I go on here, partly for my own benefit but also because it would be great to get advice! Today's Saturday, so I put on some smart clothes and went out to a nice part of town, and told myself that if I went up to one woman and told her she looked pretty, I'd have done OK. Took me a while to get the balls to do it and ended up moving away from the busy streets and going where it was a bit quieter (nice boutiques, really classy girls). Saw a really hot girl by herself and just walked up to her and said "Excuse me, I know you're really busy shopping [half sarcastically] but I just wanted to say that you looked really pretty - have a nice day!" Nothing crazy, but it went fine! She seemed pretty chuffed, so good start. Was really happy to have done something. Immediately afterwards I realised I'd been talking very quickly, so I think that's something I need to work on. Second girl a few blocks away, I stopped her in the street and said pretty much the same thing. She thanked me and told me it was very nice. Felt like I maybe came across as too much of a nice guy with her, kind of like the 'nice guy' in the movie who never gets anywhere. Know what I mean? Probably down to intonation. Lastly, I saw a girl with a really cool hat - crossed the road and said something like "Excuse me, I know you're busy shopping but I wanted to say that I really like that hat. Have a good day!" - she seemed happy enough, still talking pretty fast though! This girl was super well dressed and seemed composed but quite approachable. If I can get a date with someone like that, I'll be a very happy man. I also went up to a few people who looked lost and helped them out (properly helped them, i.e. walked them to where they were looking for, gave them advice) and that was good fun - met a beautiful Swedish woman who was with her husband, really got on with her (she touched my arm and told me how charming I was), shame she was married! Best thing about it was that although I was nervous, it was a lot of fun and I can't wait to do the same tomorrow. I definitely feel a lot less nervous - what can possibly go wrong with telling a girl she's pretty/has a cool hat etc? Seems easy written down but was hard until I did it. Learnings: - Talk more slowly - Possibly work on coming across like less of a 'nice guy' - Build these out into a convo - I'm thinking just bridge it out into "so what are you doing today" and see where that goes I also saw a lot of very pretty girls (in their 20s) out with their mums. Will try to approach them and have a bit of fun with it; what do you think? If anyone's reading this and has any advice, it would be gratefully received! |
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| Author: | Urbanerefine [ Sun Dec 08, 2013 1:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: First day |
fantastic start mate! work on situational openers to start you off such as the looking lost and ques etc. Regarding the lost girls sounds like you were in there hahah. provide good conversation, stick a time limit in there, ASK for there num or facebook if running out of time  . for example something along the lines of 'it was great talking to you stick your num in my phone (give her your phone)and well catch up properly.'hope this helps and welcome to the community Urbane. |
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| Author: | Zephh [ Sun Dec 08, 2013 9:10 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: First day |
Try different types of openers! Compliments are okay, but tricky. Although women enjoy compliments, they know you are trying to hit on them when you open with a compliment. That means she'll be qualifying you right off the bat. Of course, this isn't to say never use compliments. Try everything. |
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| Author: | fizk [ Sun Dec 08, 2013 11:38 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: First day |
Quote:
Today's Saturday, so I put on some smart clothes and went out to a nice part of town, and told myself that if I went up to one woman and told her she looked pretty, I'd have done OK. Took me a while to get the balls to do it and ended up moving away from the busy streets and going where it was a bit quieter (nice boutiques, really classy girls). Saw a really hot girl by herself and just walked up to her and said "Excuse me, I know you're really busy shopping [half sarcastically] but I just wanted to say that you looked really pretty - have a nice day!" Nothing crazy, but it went fine! She seemed pretty chuffed, so good start. Was really happy to have done something.
Good start! Similar to what i started out with, feels really good afterwards! Quote:
Immediately afterwards I realised I'd been talking very quickly, so I think that's something I need to work on.
This is something i have problems with aswell, i did record one of my conversations and i do talk very fast  I think that just by thinking about it helps alot while talking to the girls and with experience you will be able to talk slower. Overall i think we become more confident with every approach! In a while we both can approach and be totally comfortable with talking to beautiful womens. Quote:
Second girl a few blocks away, I stopped her in the street and said pretty much the same thing. She thanked me and told me it was very nice. Felt like I maybe came across as too much of a nice guy with her, kind of like the 'nice guy' in the movie who never gets anywhere. Know what I mean? Probably down to intonation.
I think you are wrong here. Nice guys dont stop pretty girls in the street and compliment them.Sure, in the beginning you(and me) probably come of as nervous guys and doesnt build any attraction, but with experience(and success) comes confidence. I might be totally wrong, but i dont think this is a issue. Quote:
Best thing about it was that although I was nervous, it was a lot of fun and I can't wait to do the same tomorrow. I definitely feel a lot less nervous - what can possibly go wrong with telling a girl she's pretty/has a cool hat etc? Seems easy written down but was hard until I did it.
Sweeet!Know that it feels very easy to do approaches and stuff while sitting in front of the computer, but then when you are there, its easy to start hesitate! So next time, approach asap to get into the right state and not overthink. As you know, i am also totally new to this, so dont take the stuff i say as "truths" 
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| Author: | smith1 [ Sun Dec 08, 2013 2:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: First day |
Really appreciate the feedback guys - unfortunately I only saw this after getting back from my second try. Fizik you were spot on; it's a lot easier to say/think this stuff when sat at a computer, as soon as I was back out there I was backing out, not approaching etc. Only managed two approaches; it was quieter out there but I could have easily done 5+ if I'd been fearless. Will have to try approaching a few people early no matter what to get into it next time. So - first girl I spoke to was walking on the same pavement in the opposite direction, cute girl probably from Spain in her mid 20s. I stopped her in the street and said "Excuse me, I can't really hang about but I just wanted to say, I think you're gorgeous." I figured gorgeous was a better word than pretty as it feels less mincey and you need some balls to come out and say it. She looked utterly shocked at first but then broke into a massive smile, which was awesome. I should have stayed and talked, but it seems like an odd thing to do if you've just said "I've got to run/I can't stay and chat" - see what I mean? Probably shouldn't matter to be honest though. I was on a bit of a high so went looking for more people in the park this time and approached an eastern European-looking woman in her late 30s taking a picture - not my type but attractive in her own sort of way. Told her the same thing and she had a face like a bulldog licking piss off a thistle - I'm not sure if she understood me or not but she definitely didn't appreciate being approached. Understand that it's bound to happen at some stage but it feels shit when it does. So, I didn't really do what I set out to do, but the first approach felt great and I think if I'd been smart I could have been onto something. Zephh and Urbane, really appreciate the feedback. Wanted to be direct and not mess about hence coming straight out and saying stuff, but happy to try new stuff. Do you mean saying something along the lines of "Saw you looking at x, does that mean y?" or asking where the best place for z is? Last question - weekends are fine for me but during the week, the only times I'm out of the office it's dark. Feels like girls wouldn't want to be approached in the dark, even on a well-lit street; is that fair? Cheers guys, thoughts much appreciated. |
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| Author: | Urbanerefine [ Sun Dec 08, 2013 4:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: First day |
your right concerning the situational openers but by all means if you have the balls as a beginner to be direct approaches straight away go for it! See how far you can push the social norms. What I would recommend though is that you go out there and try five direct and indirect openers and see which appeals more to you. Just bare in mind that when being direct your showing her that you are a sexually active man who knows what he wants, be the ultimate alpha male. Have a look at Sasha day game by far one of the best out there at the moment. best of luck, Urbane. |
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