the zone is great. i've been there before, everything i said was spot on, i could do no wrong. but how do i get there? all the previous times i've been there, it just kind of happened. i notice that around some girls i know, i can get in the zone more easily and frequently. but i don't know what exactly it is that gets me there.

also. i have trouble being in the zone/alpha with a mixed gender group. it's hard to avoid these situations sometime and it really messes me up. i think the primary reason for this is that with the guys, im not usually loud, vocal or alpha unlike when i'm with the girl which i see as inconsistency and it screws me up.

Your first question: it's a release of endorphins, neurotransmitters, and confidence. For example, you can't read a book about being in the zone and be in the zone, you have to feed off stimuli of the environment to be in the zone. It's when you realize you aren't even thinking and "performing" naturally, that you are in the zone...and it only happens after you've been building it up.

Second: Disarming can be done friendly, or it can be done sarcastically and vindictively. Depending on the target's nature (from your cold reads and routines), will give you clues as to what satisfies her with that specific obstacle/AMOG.

What's wrong with your vocals? You said you're usually not loud, which means sometimes you are. Vocal loudness, with same tone, provides an image of confidence. Practice befriending them and leaving the women alone for a few sets/nights. Focus on the guys first, and get them on your good side. If you do slip up, and use pussy-voice or whisper, they'll be more likely to lean in and say "sorry buddy, can you repeat that?" as opposed to "did you say something?". This doesn't work for all obviously. What types of males are you confronting that you are finding trouble with, and what type of trouble is it that is causing you to slip up?

I'm still kind of new to this but would building up be opening "warm up" sets? i feel like just talking to some friends who are girls will do just as much good if not more since i'm already more comfortable and confident around them.

disarming is something i haven't really looked into because when it backfires, it's a bitch. i've only really done it when im in the zone.

when i say im usually not loud, i mean that i usually don't have much to say unless i'm gaming a girl. so i'll be really talkative when im alone with the girl. it'll be a good time. but when i'm in a group, i'm less talkative and more quiet. then i get caught up in my thoughts which is bad but its hard to avoid. i end up thinking how this inconsistency would appear to the girl, what i should say to contribute or take control of the conversation etc. and this pretty much screws me