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How important is this?
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Author:  R.G. [ Wed Dec 24, 2008 5:19 pm ]
Post subject:  How important is this?
I'm sure there's a better name for this, but in the meantime I'm going to call it the "Not just another girl" complex.

My question to you is that in your opinion/experience, how important is it to convey to your target that she's not just another girl you're going to bed?

I mean we all know that all girls want sex and once you've created attraction it's just a case of breaking through her barriers to get to the jackpot, things like her ASD, need to create comfort, trust, need to prevent buyer's remorse etc. And a lot (if not the vast majority) of girls know when you're hooking up (especially with SNL's) that she's not "special" and she's just another fuck.

Do girls actually care if they're 'just another girl'? And is it worth conveying that they're not, or would this appear try-hard, fake and/or AFC?
Author:  lawls [ Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:00 pm ]
Post subject: 
The MOST important in my mind, because she is with you- that merits at least some respect where she should be the ONLY one at that moment you would kill or die for- no one else/nothing else should exist at that time except her and you.

Doing this to break it down...she won't even think about the "what if" scenario or start thinking about future problems. Your GOING be totally with her, I mean every part of you...the only reason everything else you said comes out is because women over half the time sense a guy is not with them emotional- meaning they distance themselves when thinking about something- meaning they ain't there with her which goes into they can't protect her.

On a sidenote: STOP USING PUA TERMINOLOGY! :p
Author:  870 [ Wed Dec 24, 2008 6:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
I can't tell you whether girls care about being considered "special" or not, but I can tell you that I care, because I have no interest in hooking up with women who aren't unique :)

That said, this isn't something that needs to be explicitly stated during the interaction--that would be AFC and try-hard. Instead, I let them know subtly by discussing the super-high standards I have for people I allow into my life. I started doing this for a number of reasons, but one side-effect of it that I never expected when I implemented it as a component of my game is that it makes the woman realize--maybe for the first time in her life-- that she really is a beautiful, sexy, intelligent, amazing individual.

After all, if she wasn't, I wouldn't be involved with her, right? :D
Author:  R.G. [ Wed Dec 24, 2008 8:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey 870.

I am inclined to agree. That's a good point actually, the standards thing. I think every good PUA has to understand the concept of standards, and so many so called 'mPUA's' preach it. I suppose putting that across, apart from the other good things it does, somewhat innoculates you from the "Just another girl" complex.

For Zac:
Quote:
The MOST important in my mind, because she is with you- that merits at least some respect where she should be the ONLY one at that moment you would kill or die for- no one else/nothing else should exist at that time except her and you.
I disagree, I think a PUA should do the exact opposite, at least to start with. You have to come from an abundance mindset, not a scarcity mindset, to quote TD. You could be anywhere else and loads of hot girls want you, what is this particular girl going to do to keep your attention and to win YOU over? That's the question, and i suppose that ties nicely in with standards. I suppose also if the girl wins YOU over, or she feels like she has (reward her for qualifying behaviour etc), then that would also innoculate you somewhat from the "just another girl" complex, because she feels she has earned you. Nice! Good discussion.
Author:  lawls [ Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:44 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:

For Zac:
Quote:
The MOST important in my mind, because she is with you- that merits at least some respect where she should be the ONLY one at that moment you would kill or die for- no one else/nothing else should exist at that time except her and you.
I disagree, I think a PUA should do the exact opposite, at least to start with. You have to come from an abundance mindset, not a scarcity mindset, to quote TD. You could be anywhere else and loads of hot girls want you, what is this particular girl going to do to keep your attention and to win YOU over? That's the question, and i suppose that ties nicely in with standards. I suppose also if the girl wins YOU over, or she feels like she has (reward her for qualifying behaviour etc), then that would also innoculate you somewhat from the "just another girl" complex, because she feels she has earned you. Nice! Good discussion.
OK, I'm not coming from a PUA viewpoint. Personally I think it analyses WAY too much. Mind you..with the mindset I stated above that isn't a scarcity mindset- its just if I value a women enough to spend time with me she deserves EVERYTHING I got. That means my honor, respect, and essentially my life to some degree. I'm fully there with her. I'll go so far as say SURRENDER to her.

None of that is needy, if anything that takes alot of courage because YOU know where your coming from & your not doing this to impress her. Its a sincere genuine act that she knows is real if not unbelievable. Chivalry isn't dead...the scholar warrior still exists. To be able to do this though, you need to have your sh!t fully together, cause it can come off as you said needy (then its an act), the real stuff (genuinely have you sh!t together) is rare and women value that SO MUCH.
Author:  %Neo% [ Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:52 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:

For Zac:
Quote:
The MOST important in my mind, because she is with you- that merits at least some respect where she should be the ONLY one at that moment you would kill or die for- no one else/nothing else should exist at that time except her and you.
I disagree, I think a PUA should do the exact opposite, at least to start with. You have to come from an abundance mindset, not a scarcity mindset, to quote TD. You could be anywhere else and loads of hot girls want you, what is this particular girl going to do to keep your attention and to win YOU over? That's the question, and i suppose that ties nicely in with standards. I suppose also if the girl wins YOU over, or she feels like she has (reward her for qualifying behaviour etc), then that would also innoculate you somewhat from the "just another girl" complex, because she feels she has earned you. Nice! Good discussion.
OK, I'm not coming from a PUA viewpoint. Personally I think it analyses WAY too much. Mind you..with the mindset I stated above that isn't a scarcity mindset- its just if I value a women enough to spend time with me she deserves EVERYTHING I got. That means my honor, respect, and essentially my life to some degree. I'm fully there with her. I'll go so far as say SURRENDER to her.

None of that is needy, if anything that takes alot of courage because YOU know where your coming from & your not doing this to impress her. Its a sincere genuine act that she knows is real if not unbelievable. Chivalry isn't dead...the scholar warrior still exists. To be able to do this though, you need to have your sh!t fully together, cause it can come off as you said needy (then its an act), the real stuff (genuinely have you sh!t together) is rare and women value that SO MUCH.
I agree with some points of what you say Zac but why should I surrender myself if the girl isn't. Relationships are a two way street and if I am going to surrender shouldn't the girl?? This girl needs to see that I am the catch and if she doesn't work fast she'll lose me, because if its the other way around I would be the one getting dropped. Wouldn't you agree?

-Neo
You have to let it all go. Fear, doubt, and disbelief. Free your mind.
Author:  %Neo% [ Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:54 am ]
Post subject: 
Plus PUA terminology is useful. Try saying Neuro Linguistic Programming 5 times fast.

-Neo

You have to let it all go. Fear, doubt, and disbelief. Free your mind.
Author:  lawls [ Thu Dec 25, 2008 6:28 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Quote:
Quote:

For Zac:
I disagree, I think a PUA should do the exact opposite, at least to start with. You have to come from an abundance mindset, not a scarcity mindset, to quote TD. You could be anywhere else and loads of hot girls want you, what is this particular girl going to do to keep your attention and to win YOU over? That's the question, and i suppose that ties nicely in with standards. I suppose also if the girl wins YOU over, or she feels like she has (reward her for qualifying behaviour etc), then that would also innoculate you somewhat from the "just another girl" complex, because she feels she has earned you. Nice! Good discussion.
OK, I'm not coming from a PUA viewpoint. Personally I think it analyses WAY too much. Mind you..with the mindset I stated above that isn't a scarcity mindset- its just if I value a women enough to spend time with me she deserves EVERYTHING I got. That means my honor, respect, and essentially my life to some degree. I'm fully there with her. I'll go so far as say SURRENDER to her.

None of that is needy, if anything that takes alot of courage because YOU know where your coming from & your not doing this to impress her. Its a sincere genuine act that she knows is real if not unbelievable. Chivalry isn't dead...the scholar warrior still exists. To be able to do this though, you need to have your sh!t fully together, cause it can come off as you said needy (then its an act), the real stuff (genuinely have you sh!t together) is rare and women value that SO MUCH.
I agree with some points of what you say Zac but why should I surrender myself if the girl isn't. Relationships are a two way street and if I am going to surrender shouldn't the girl?? This girl needs to see that I am the catch and if she doesn't work fast she'll lose me, because if its the other way around I would be the one getting dropped. Wouldn't you agree?

-Neo
You have to let it all go. Fear, doubt, and disbelief. Free your mind.
Heres an analogy to think about:

You tell a women you have an awesome room. Its the MOST fantastic room in the world! It has candy mountain, it has gold and silver, it has everything anyone could want. Same time...its a dark pitch black room. You obviously can't tell her its the best thing and expect her to walk in, you have to walk in 1st then turn on the light- she will follow after...

So to answer you Neo, its a trust issue- your expecting her to take the 1st step which isn't going happen. In you surrendering she will follow suit.
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